The good news is that we have just unexpectedly discovered how social networking can generate a new type of forgiveness!
We aren't super tech savvy, and when we were finally able to get on LinkedIn, Ed wasn't sure what to do next. Pressing what looked like an innocuous button, he thought he was inviting just some new business contacts and work friends, but what he actually did was inadvertently invite everyone we had ever sent an e-mail to, including Deb's 88-year-old mother.
We only knew this had happened when we started to receive hundreds of "accepts" from everyone and anyone, including three people Ed used to know but, due to difficult circumstances, he no longer had anything to do with. In Buddhist terms, these people are simply known as the enemy -- anyone you had a hard time with or who is having a difficult time with you.
Our friend Kiri roared with laughter when we told her. She said it also happened to her and happens more often than we may realize:
What many of us fail to realize is that with a simple click of the mouse, our worlds open up far and wide, and, along with long lost friends, people we have consciously chosen to close out of our lives come tumbling back in. Suddenly we are faced with having to reject them again, or to open up and accept their online offerings of friendship.
Kiri's husband Phill experienced just that:
When Phill joined Facebook, it was for business purposes -- a way to promote his new tattoo shop and share photos of his art. What he didn't expect was that he would start receiving friend requests from dozens of people from his distant past. "Sure," he thought, "why not say hello?" He thought this would be similar to running into someone from high school in the grocery store. But after accepting someone he hadn't spoken to in nearly two decades, he then received a message wanting to rehash a fight they had had when just kids. "Why did you punch me that day?" the new/old friend demanded to know. Phill was faced with a whole slew of emotions about the vulnerability this world of social networking elicited. He had a choice: to close off again or see this as an opportunity to move forward and release old pains associated with his past relationships.
In the same way, unintentionally, Ed had accidentally invited three "enemies" -- three people he would probably have never communicated with again -- to be on LinkedIn, and he felt very odd. But in retrospect, it was brilliant. Or perhaps, as the saying goes, coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous! With their acceptance, anything that was unresolved was released within Ed. It turned out to be a simple, impersonal and neutral way to offer and receive an olive branch.
There's a huge feel-good factor when adverse feelings dissolve. Gone is that nagging and uncomfortable negativity hovering somewhere in the back of your monkey mind. Gone is that distasteful communication or misunderstanding. In their place is a sense of relief and even forgiveness. Your world can move forward again. In Ed's case, he doesn't feel any particular need to see or communicate further with any of the three people, but he has no concern if he does. This leaves him feeling a whole lot happier and freer.
Releasing past conflicts is, therefore, an unexpected fringe benefit to modern technology (we are sure it wasn't listed as one of the original purposes!). If you are at all shy, unwilling or otherwise unable to face someone you are having a problem with, then you can just e-mail them. And, hey, presto! No problem!
Have you ever accidentally done this? If so, what was the outcome? Do comment below. You can receive notice of our blogs every Tuesday by clicking" Become a Fan" at the top.
See our award-winning book, "Be the Change: How Meditation Can Transform You and the World," forewords by the Dalai Lama and Robert Thurman, with contributors Kiri Westby, Michael Beckwith, Marianne Williamson, Dan Millman, Jane Fonda, Ram Dass, Byron Katie and many others.
Our three meditation CDs -- "Metta: Loving-Kindness and Forgiveness," "Samadhi: Breath Awareness and Insight" and "Yoga Nidra: Inner Conscious Relaxation" -- are available at www.EdandDebShapiro.com.
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Mother Shares Information on the Healing Power of Forgiveness
fanned & fav'd
Fanned & Fav'd
Some people are a piece of work -
your attitude and composure sounds spot on picard922
fanned & fav'd
* LinkedIn * is not even in the Oxford dictionary -
we are 10 doors from the ocean in san diego. we are keeping glued to the tv. please send your best thoughts our way. we may be evac'ing soon. we have to see what happens in santa barabara.
may all being have happiness.
Peace peace peace
May all beings be safe !
thank you so much for the good vibes sent our way, i loved the mantra. it was calming and allowed me to see a bit further than my fear allowed for and i then knew our paticular situation was ok. I am going to keep close as things always change...
such a day my Reiki Master, Master Narvo lives in japan, i need to find out her status thru her family here. her niece is one of my bff's and i found out one of my lamas died in India. I took refuge with Lama Gyasto, he gave me my dharma name, Pema Chosynid
a couple of years ago we talked of going together on an adventure in tibet. look for some things left behind...what a day.
you two have allowed me to open my heart here and your always so kind. i felt you around me yesterday. and it was very appreciated!
happiness and peace to you.
Pema
Electronic clutter can be hazardous to one's well being, use with caution..............
On the other hand, we would not have been able to have moved our business out of the country without it......the proverbial "double edge sword."
We've been on the road this past week .......Pigging out on New England seafood and visiting old friends. We're looking forward to returning to Vancouver....." See" you next week.....Take care........SOF.
Fanned & Fav'd
If u don't have a sense of humor - it's just not funny!
Ed
I intentionally sent a bit of VERY GOOD NEWS ( The Meta Secret book and DVD that I am the one woman teacher in is #1 in Italy and #3 in Thailand.) to a woman that appeared to not wish me well.
Boy, was I right! Even though I hadn't even spoken to her in months she claimed that I was a liar...and it went downhill from there.
I chuckled to see that my suspicion was right, and that she had only pretended to be my friend to gain access to my social circle.(And get a shot at sleeping with my ex-boyfriend.)
It was such a great opportunity to forgive and weed out your rolodex!
Thanks for sharing -
life is a great University - we learn things that can make us stronger (or we can fall)
whichever we chose as long as we get up each time when we fall then we learn -
graduate and move on!
Lovingly,
Ed
But then I've seen this thing before so I guess this is one of those "cultural items transmitted by repetition in a manner analogous to the biological transmission of genes" from some funny and family-friendly site, I wonder which one…
what are you trying to say?
They used special proteins found in the brain to glue brain cells, called neurons, onto the chip. However, the proteins acted as more than just a simple adhesive.
"They also provided the link between ionic channels of the neurons and semiconductor material in a way that neural electrical signals could be passed to the silicon chip,"
The proteins allowed the neuro-chip's electronic components and its living cells to communicate with each other. Electrical signals from neurons were recorded using the chip's transistors, while the chip's capacitors were used to stimulate the neurons."
Lets all get connected.
Lets use technology to get to the higher centers instead of rising up ourselves. What could go wrong with that?
It is so much fun being a screen talking to other screens.
After all it is just a reflection of where we are at already.
Dropping the fixation with the screen within is the best way to "friend" everyone and everything.
appreciate your sharing of * wisdom through the screen * technology
Om mane padme hum
may all beings be happy & safe :-))
Sure is a beautiful day out though isn't it? ... feels like a real beginning of spring today.
I really love seeing the crocuses (croci) popping up.
Have a great end of week.
with a name like * SilGal * you are right when u say:
"I think with all of these sites, the key is a sense of humor and not taking ourselves quiet so seriously.Â"
As for Facebook - brr, that site can be just creepy. I had an account for a couple of weeks at the urging of another friend (NB these are real friends I've met in the flesh!) who said writers pretty much need to use sites like this. Well, I found FB terminally boring and the suggestions of total strangers I might like to be "friends" with irksome. But the killer was when my boss received an email suggesting he join FB and listed people he might like to be "friends" with. The list included me, our general manager, and a bloke I've never heard of who worked at the business a decade ago.
My boss doesn't use any networking sites. Our general manager might have a Facebook page. But I'd never put ANY personal information up - not my home or work address, nothing. I had the privacy settings as high as I could get them. Yet this creepy thing linked three people to where I work, and contacted a fourth. I can only guess it trawled our address from Amazon or suchlike, since we get personal mail delivered to work. Breach of privacy, much?
great story - it can be invasive at times for sure.
Maybe the old days when we would meet people in the here and now was better than we think :-))
but here we are in a vast range of social networking - sometime cool & sometimes.... oh well
And for some people, receiving an invitation is not an olive branch, and may be in fact seen as aggressive.
Now, what I am taking away from this article is that we should all go through our contact list and delete the enemies and 'don't knows' to not have this happen.
actually there are some people who may not know how to delete from their address list as it may take a computer expert to do that - it is not as easy as you suggest.
Yes! there are many situations that can be difficult - aggressive
Some lists seem to accumulate every email you ever sent.
Every e-mail client has a list of your contacts available, and usually to the left of each contact is a check box. Above the 1st check box, there is usually a 'select all' and/or a 'delete' button(s).
I also respectfully say that those who do not know how to cull and delete their contacts lists, maybe shouldn't be using e-mail in the first place. This does not a computer expert take.
I am aware of the auto-populating contact list like in gmail, but with all technological engagements, just like in real life, you must do some housecleaning every once and a while. (I recommend browsing lists at least once a month and cleaning up).
Thank you for your response.
that is the nature of social networking & that is what the delete button is for
enjoy your day,
Ed
You enjoy your day as well.
Thank you kat momma for sharing you lovely comment
I would recommend other read it :-))
quite a scenario :-))
Check out these websites and a humorous Dhamma talk by Ajahn Bramh!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dj98u8peZOU&feature=player_embedded
http://www.youtube.com/user/BuddhistSocietyWA
great youtube video/video's
thanks khanti