Dead At 32: What Jamie Dyer Dordek Can Teach You About Living
I didn't meet Jamie until after she died. 
Think life is certain? Guess again.
Jaime was a blaze of florescent colors until she stepped off a curb and sprained her ankle. The blood clot from that minor accident traveled to her brain and killed her.
Jamie Dyer Dordek was 32.
I got to know Jaime through her family, friends and her wonderful blog before I spoke at her memorial service. Even though Jamie only got 32 years to cram her life into, she lived her life full out. There wasn't a person in that room whose life hadn't become more vibrant because of The J Woman. I couldn't help falling in love with her myself.
Jamie reached out. On line. Standing in line. Traveling. At home. With Andy. At work. Her smile and laughter couldn't be contained by physical space. She made the planet Earth a better place for being here.
So here are tips for living...Jamie Style.
1) Pick Out The Olives
Jaime had the guts to love bacon and hate water chestnuts, melon and olives. Do you eat food you don't like? With people that don't inspire you? Cease and desist. Life is short.
Water chestnuts are garbage. They make absolutely no sense whatsoever. Tasteless, obtrusive and disgusting. Melon I at least kind of understand. It's sweet, people like sweet. I consider it unnecessary filler. Olives make the most sense to me. I see why people love them. They're salty and can have real depth of flavor. I just happen to think they are also incredibly foul. Luckily, they are the kind of ingredient that one can simply pick out of an otherwise great meal. --JD
Tip: Give yourself what you love, love, love! It's your life. Pick out the olives.
2) Love it, Like It or Don't Look
Jaime was comfortable in her own skin. She was a big girl dashing about in a skinny-girl-hyper-hip world. Did she moan about her thighs? No. Did she focus on the small stuff? No.
I realize how unimportant most of the crap we worry about is. Do people like me? Do they want to hear what I have to say? Am I cute enough? Am I desirable enough? Jesus, Mary and Joseph, a person could go crazy. So, I say, Do what makes you happy. Unless pleated pants make you happy. In that one small case, do what makes me happy. Everything else is yours.--JD
Tip: Love it, like it or don't look.
3) WWBD?
"Life goes better with...bacon!" was Jamie's motto. Having grown up on a farm in Kansas I know what a pigpen smells like. I don't get near things pig related. Not so for our Jamie. She surrounded herself with all things bacon. She had bacon band-aids, bacon mints and her prized possession a folder the WWBD "What Would Bacon Do?" folder. In a bind? Spin the arrow to discover the sage wisdom of bacon to guide your decision-making. (I was so curious that I had to get one for myself.)
Tip: Find your bacon. Fill your life with what you love, love, love and leave the rest.
4) The Diet Coke Friendship Test
Jaime made friends...everywhere. And I do mean everywhere. She even made friends in business. (A huge tip for anyone in business.)
Pick your friends because they make you laugh. They look up to you and you can look up to them. Who cares what they look like or what social strata they belong to? If they can make diet coke fly out of your nose or pee your pants a little, they're keepers in my book.
I decided to pick my friends on how they made me feel. I found my chosen family based on actual emotion. I've never looked back.--JD
Tip: The Friendship Equation
They Admire You plus You Admire Them plus Diet Coke Runs Out of Your Nose Laugher= FRIEND
5) Make It Blaze, Baby
Jamie lived full tilt. She made a difference. Her family and friends say that the world isn't as colorful without her.
Now, it's our turn. Now, we are her hands. We are her smile. From this day forward how can you make a person next to you smile or laugh? Or give away that last pair of pleated pants?
You can receive notice of my blogs every Friday by checking Become a Fan at the top. Ask Eli a question at info@elidavidson.com or go to www.elidavidson.com today.
Eli Davidson is a nationally recognized executive coach and motivational speaker. Her book, "Funky to Fabulous: Surefire Success Stories for the Savvy, Sassy and Swamped", (Oak Grove Publishing) has won three national book awards. Eli is a reinvention catalyst, who can transform your professional and personal life from Funky to Fabulous with her ten, trademarked Turnaround Techniques that create rapid and remarkable results. Check out her blog at http://funkytofabulous.blogspot.com/
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Eli, What a wonderful story about such an incredible woman. We can all learn from this. If we want to leave an impression, we have to START NOW. I have always believed that if we wrote our obituaries now, we would have a guide book to use to get our goals met.
This was a woman who clearly knew how to make a day juicy. She knew how to make her friends feel special and she knew how to have a public profile that was rich and sustaining. She makes me want to take up bacon on general principals. Reminds me of the day I discovered that I really don't like salmon. It was a lot of peer pressure that made me think I liked it. How can you like a fish with a silent L anyway?
So, to all the Jamie fans, I toast you. It is hard to loose a shooting star.
Frances Holliday Alford
Jamie posted a video comment to Tumblr and she giggled...
I followed Jamie on twitter and tumblr. I was thrilled when Joe Schmitt (we work together) told me she was coming to Chicago. I was excited to meet her as I always looked forward to her tweets. All I can say is what "an amazing spirit". She was so genuine, kind and had a smile that made her eyes sparkle. We talked for a bit and shared our favorite food at Joan's On Third, where we hoped to meet for lunch someday. I was jealous that she live so close to this restaurant.
I liked Jamie immediately and will always remember thinking, "she is such a kind soul". Her parents must be amazing people to have raised such a wonderful person.
Thank you Eli for this article and thank you Jamie for being you!
We miss you more than you could ever imagine!
xo
justirish
You are teaching me.
Here I have been railing against Twitter -and look at the kindness and connection it provides.
Maybe we can all meet at
Joan's on 3rd
for a BRING ON THE BACON
Jamie Lovefest.
Love,
Eli
Like so many who have posted here I only knew Jamie through Twitter and Tumblr. She brought joy and fun and an effortless wit to both of these. Jamie's posts from her trips were a joy to share.
We all miss her, those of us who only knew her from a distance and for a very short time. This article, so filled with her warmth and humour is a wonderful tribute to a wonderful woman.
To Jamie's husband, family and friends, love and blessings to you.
Thank you so much for this lovely memorial to Jamie. It is almost impossible to capture her energy in written form, and you did a lovely job of it.
For her, I am choosing brighter colors when I get dressed in the morning. I am spending more time with the people who pass my diet coke test. Luckily smiling and laughing are two of my favorite things, but I'm trying to share them more with strangers. I'm following her charge not worrying about unimportant crap, and fighting the good fight against pleated pants.
I love her and miss her so much.
Hey Kkpdx,
Thanks so much for waving the
No Mo Pleated Pants Flag.
My bet is that lots of strangers are are having better days because of you.
Go Bacon Go!
Eli
Jamie was one of my favorites from a large group of friends I've made through Twitter/Tumblr. Above all, she consistently made me laugh and smile, and for that I will always remember her. From what I can tell, she lived her life to the fullest and enjoyed every passing moment, and that is something we should all aspire to do. Let that be her greatest gift.
Hot Damn!
Big, Bold BACON Blessings to you.
Thank you so much for sharing the Jamie Shout.
YOU MADE SOMEONE'S DAY.
Your Fan,
Eli
I only "knew" Jamie via Twitter and Tumblr, but nonetheless felt a deep loss with her passing. This article is a wonderful tribute to the spirit and delight with which she seemed to live her life. She was, and continues to be, an inspiration.
Hearts and stars.
Jamie was a beautiful person, and I'll miss the joy she shared. Wishing comfort to all those who love her; I am so sorry for your loss.
I love how one woman living in her authenticity instills courage in the rest of us to be willing to do the same. Thanks for the inspiration!
Amen!!!
and thank you Davia!!!
Many of us 'followed' Jamie on Twitter and/or Tumblr, and even those who (like me) never met her in real life, got to know her and love her as though she was our favorite friend and neighbor. Like everyone, I was shocked and saddened by her death. This article is a lovely and accurate tribute to a wonderful person, whose spunk and personality will shine on forever in the hearts of all who were lucky enough to have shared any part of her short but full life. Her online presence was always inspiring, humorous and witty; through her blog posts and photos, we got to travel along with Jamie and enjoy her experiences with her. I continue to 'follow' her on both sites, because I'm convinced, if there's anyone who will send us messages and pictures from the other side, it will be Jamie!
Dear Lisa,
THANK YOU! For standing up and sharing the JAMIE LOVE.
Your reaching out to is a testimony that LOVE will always win.
First, I want to say it seemed to almost take an act of Congress to make this comment, but that's another story. I loved this post. Thanks for such a lighthearted and wonderful introduction to this lighthearted young woman. It's such a joy to hear about people who are living authentically, and Jamie obviously was. I also want thank you and Jamie for introducing me to Perpetual Kid. Talk about lighthearted and playful!
:) Nancy
Hi Nanceyeve2,
Thank you so much for commenting. This post and its comments mean so much to those that loved this bright Light of a woman.
Jamie was and IS an inspiration.
We are all perpetual kids. I am so glad that Jamie introduced us to the site.
I am a big believer in having a Inner Child 'shopportunity'
Love,
Eli
Your best post yet! Loved it Eli!
See Dr. Cara Barker's Profile
Eli, I love, love, love what you have created here on more levels than I can name. Although I did not know her, you've done something remarkable: you've captured the Spirit of a slendid human being, I just know. What a comfort this must be to her family and friends: to know that 'their Jamie' was seen and heard as the brilliant young woman she was. Her Light lives on through your 'pen' and memories shared.
With gratitude,
Cara
Dearest Cara,
I am so deeply touched to have you participate in this conversation. Jamie was such a compelling human being, such a bright Spirit that she did brighten lives everywhere.
I am so incredibly grateful to have a platform on The Huffington Post. My intention has always been to use this opportunity for the Greater Good. There was such a calling inside to have Jamie take her place here.
If this simple act could bring comfort to Jamie's wonderful family and friends I am deeply blessed, humbled and grateful. (I have wept so much this week while reading the precious, tender and profoundly loving comments from her family and friends.)
Thank you. My bet is that Jamie would have loved, loved, loved that you read her wonderful writing.
In Appreciation,
Eli
I spent a couple of hours last night reading her blog (ORD to LAX) and her Tumblr post. She was very funny and has a great energy that bolts through in her words, face and smile that still feels here even though her body is not... Great taste in music, apparently in friends. and a really good eye for photos to capture her "moments".
namaste...
Hi Hippiechik,
Isn't her blog...wel
Tell us more about wordle.net.
What a great idea to have Jamie "word clouds"
Love,
Eli
This Is such a wonderful thing, you captured Jamie as well as anyone could have, She was the best person I knew, I had tears of joy running down my face when I read this. She loved the Huffington post and she is smiling, I can feel it, to know that so many people are reading about her. Thank you so much for this, it means so much to me and my family, may people forever remember wwbd, because I know to smile every day because of her, my sister taught me more then anyone will ever believe, and I am glad she is teaching more people, even after her untimely death, she will live on in the hearts of everyone who knew her, and who reads this wonderful blog.
Matt Tinnon
Jamies little brother
Dearest Matt.
There are no words to express how deeply I honor you.
Your sister loved you beyond measure. When I read her passage about how much she loved you and the rest of your family...I broke down in tears at the Memorial.
You have a great life ahead of you.
My prayer is that you live. Full out. Fully YOU.
Love,
Eli
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