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Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.

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The Joy of Play

Posted: 06/16/11 08:50 AM ET

I remember when I was a kid, playtime was what I looked forward to the most. I think that's on par with most kids. But something happens to us as adults where we get indoctrinated into a system where play gets relegated down the priority list. It's not something we intentionally choose, it's a subtle process where a belief is planted and nurtured that play simply isn't important and as the years go on we wonder why we "feel so old."

Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw said:

"We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing."

This quote hits the nail on the head. Youth is a matter of mind and attitude. I was recently sitting with a friend, who is 62 years old, but he doesn't look 62, he looks younger. He told me, "My face reflects who I am on the inside."

Yes, this is true; he is a playful guy, "young at heart" as they say.

Here is an excerpt from "A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook" that says it all. Read it over a couple times:

"Intention shapes our thoughts and words.

Thoughts and words mold our actions.

Thoughts, words, and actions shape our behaviors.

Behaviors sculpt our bodily expressions.

Bodily expressions fashion our character.

Our character hardens into what we look like."

It has been said that by the time a person is 50, he or she gets the face they deserve. This is how the mind directly affects the body."

The truth is, we're never too old to start playing again. The question is how can we bring more play into our lives?

Here's one thought:

In her book "The Artist's Way", Julia Cameron suggests creating an "artist's date." All this means is that you take two hours a week to do something creative and/or fun that you would normally tell yourself that you don't have time to do. If you are in a city, this could be going to a neighborhood you've wanted to visit, going to a museum, or even going on a hike somewhere that you've wanted to visit.

You can also take it to journal, play the guitar, read poetry, sit in a coffee shop and write, play video games, or start on that art piece you've been putting off because you "just don't have the time." The point is make it time just for you, a time of intentional play that you normally would not give yourself permission to do.

Don't negotiate with your mind that's telling you there's no time, just plan it and do it.

We need to water the seeds of playfulness in our lives. This is what keeps our youth alive and my guess is it also elongates our lives.

Give it a try!

As always, please share your thoughts, stories and questions below. Your interaction creates a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.

Adapted from a publication on Mindfulness and Psychotherapy at Psychcentral.com. Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D. is Co-author of A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook. You may also find him at www.drsgoldstein.com.

 
 
 

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I remember when I was a kid, playtime was what I looked forward to the most. I think that's on par with most kids. But something happens to us as adults where we get indoctrinated into a system where ...
I remember when I was a kid, playtime was what I looked forward to the most. I think that's on par with most kids. But something happens to us as adults where we get indoctrinated into a system where ...
 
 
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01:35 PM on 07/28/2011
Wow, this is pretty deep and interesting stuff. I'd like to share on my site (http://www.GNMGoods.com)
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french queen13
my beloved is mine and I am his
03:51 AM on 06/20/2011
I play every day. I stop at a cafe on the way to work to say hello to the other regulars there and read the paper, then stroll through the park to get in contact with my beloved (who's in Spirit) and find out what we did the night before. I catch up with a friend on Skype during the day (she's on the other side of the pond and my work allows that sort of thing - in fact my boss and my friend talk to each other too). Many evenings I write a diary of what my beloved and I got up to during my night-travels, and make pictures to go with them and post on a writers' website. Eventually I get around to answering the reviews we get, lol. And weather permitting, I usually go out on a Saturday, to stroll around favourite parts of Melbourne, by the bay or around the leafier suburbs or in favourite shopping strips. I spend as much time playing as I do working!
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Lawson Meadows
Plant in your kids, the seeds of greatness!
03:15 PM on 06/19/2011
Dr. Goldstein,

Excellent topic with a wide spectrum of application...

Playing is widly accepted as a time of diversion and rejuvination; its value is well proven and substantial. However, in the same way habituation to drugs shift the focus and the priorities, the combination of TV, the Internet, and even air conditioning have shifted the focus of generations.

Can the same benefit from a brisk walk, or a game of tennis, or even a lively discussion with friends be derived over time from a sitcom, or the downing of a boss on World of Warcraft?

Maybe that's it... the passive play has now displaced the active... I certainly hope not!

Lawson Meadows
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Arithrianos
reality has already (w)on(e), surrender!
03:11 PM on 06/17/2011
a whole army of dedicated gravitistas would be hard pressed to stop the play i engorge on momenteously, or secondaritatiously, or whatever, i am at play in the fields of the lord (samantabhadra/i) as the phrase goes, and since reality is playing with me as well, i get thoughtful read painful reminders is i give into that spirit of gravity and forget to play, so no danger really, the play must indeed go on.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Bill Duckworth
It is a DOOZY
09:24 AM on 06/17/2011
Life on earth should be the recess and the learning time should be how to have a better recess.

Unfortunately, we are spending TONS of money to administrate our youth and ourselves to accumulate, achieve and leave a huge pile of trash for the next generations to deal with or live without because it is all gone
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
khanti
Cultivator
08:07 PM on 06/16/2011
Great article gonna share it with my facebook friends.