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Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.

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Osama Bin Laden Dead: A Mindful Response

Posted: 05/02/11 11:34 PM ET

In his or her wisdom, one unknown person once said:

I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.

Osama Bin Laden is dead. But what does that mean exactly? Vindication? A cause for celebration? Justice served? Revenge?

When I heard the news, I was surprised. The thought that came into my head was, "Wow, I can't believe it really happened." Then I clicked on a video showing the crowds of lively people screaming and jumping around in jubilation over the death of a man, screaming, "U.S.A.! U.S.A.! U.S.A.!" as though we had just won the World Cup. I had this gut feeling that the reaction seemed sort of strange. This wasn't like we had just kicked in the winning goal; we had just killed somebody, and it seemed like I was watching some kind of dark comedy. I thought, "What is the difference between what I am seeing on the video and a crowd standing by and cheering while some enemy is getting stoned to death in front of us?"

You see, my reaction wasn't to Osama Bin Laden dying. He was a man who caused so many people much lifelong pain, and I'm glad we don't have to worry about him anymore. (That doesn't mean we don't have to worry about others who want to cause us harm.) But something just seemed off, as if we weren't processing our emotions around this properly. It was a good moment for America, yes, but was it a moment for cheering, laughing and jubilation?

I decided to sleep on it.

When I woke up this morning, I saw a post from Susan Piver, who seemed to have had the same reaction as me. She said something that made a lot of sense:

Look at your own reaction this morning.

Was there even a hint of vengefulness or gladness at Osama bin Laden's death? If so, that is a real problem. Whatever suffering he may have experienced cannot reverse even one moment of the suffering he caused. If you believe his death is a form of compensation, you are deluded.

There has been an outpouring of misdirected jubilation, as if a contest had been won. Nothing has been won. Unlike winning a sporting event, this doesn't mean that our team has triumphed. Far from it. There is only one team, and it is us.

How long will it take -- or maybe a better question is what will it take -- for us to recognize that we are all connected to one another? Causing pain to another group of people is a strange place to derive happiness from. It seems to be a false happiness; at the root it's really anger or fear.

Thich Nhat Hanh has a wonderful saying: "Peace in ourselves, peace in the world."

This isn't a Pollyanna notion that we should all just hold hands and pretend that there's no war, pain or trauma; this is a very real and practical path toward creating a better world. We need to learn how to take a good look at the wars we have raging inside each and every one of us in response to our own personal traumas in life -- whether that's the death of a loved one, harm inflicted on us, or some form of emotional trauma -- and learn ways to create peace within ourselves. It's a very simple path, but it's not at all easy. In my opinion, that's why we default to being reactive and causing more war.

So goodbye, Osama Bin Laden. May the families and friends who have suffered at your hands feel more at peace without you around. And may you be at peace with the wars that raged within you to the point that you held the misguided delusion that killing thousands of people was somehow a path in the right direction.

And may we all be free from our misguided reactions to the wars within and help guide all people into a direction of greater empathy, compassion and peace within ourselves and the world.

 
 
 

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In his or her wisdom, one unknown person once said: I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies ...
In his or her wisdom, one unknown person once said: I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies ...
 
 
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02:20 PM on 05/05/2011
WOW! Your commentary is so reflective of a deeply thoughtful, considerable response from a peaceful perspective, and I feel strongly that words such as YOURS need to be captured in our mainstream media. My heart feels weary from the internal pain I feel over how off-center we are as a nation... we have so far to go with what this represents on a global scale. My compassion for Afghanistan, Pakistan, and all suffering on the planet run through my blood intensely, and there's near sham for me as an American to see how we, as a country, are responding to this "justice" as we call it. Our ignorance is painfully clear... and thank you for shedding light on a highly complex and importantly relevant issue. I pray for the people of Afghanistan, and even more for Al Qaeda, whose delusion is so real they cannot penetrate it; much like our overall consciousness here in America. Thanks for a worthy article.
08:13 PM on 05/04/2011
Good article. thanks
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05:42 PM on 05/04/2011
I appreciate your perspective at this time.
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michelesda
My micro-bio is empty.
02:39 PM on 05/04/2011
One man's mindfulness is another man's mindlessness. Chacun a son goute!
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Ed and Deb Shapiro
12:25 PM on 05/04/2011
HH the Dalai Lama suggested the United States was justified in killing Osama bin Laden.

he said of Osama Bin Laden as a human being he may have deserved compassion & forgiveness

but you don't forget what happened

it is sometimes necessary to take counter measures...
10:34 AM on 05/04/2011
Look, I appreciate your sentiments about human dignity and the bonds that connect us, but we're talking about a psychopath who would have happily severed those bonds between you, me, our families, etc., all because we live in the "wrong" country, or practice the "wrong" religion. I am a card-carrying liberal -- college professor AND musician -- but it's arguments like the one you make here that drive the majority of people INSANE about liberalism and what we on the Left believe. I personally had a rather sober response -- I didn't take to the streets or shout "USA! "USA!" But I would not denegrate nor speak condescendingly about the people who do. OBL got his comeuppance, and I'm damn glad to have seen this moment finally arrive.
01:55 AM on 05/05/2011
Revenge creates more revenge. Obama said in his speech in the aftermath of bin Laden getting killed, "The United States did not choose this war."-He couldn't have been more right.
Justtice was definitely done in the death of Osama bin Laden. We didn't choose this war, so keeping it that way is what matters to me.
In no way, did the Doctor in this article sound like she was condescending to the people who lost loved ones in that terrible tragedy on 9/11. However, I agree, to celebrate killing someone like we just watched a touchdown at a football game and brag about how wonderful the U.S. is for a serious action they had to take glorifies revenge and after all, isn't revenge the very trait we despised in Osama bin Laden?
01:16 PM on 05/11/2011
She?
08:13 AM on 05/04/2011
If you are cured of cancer do you mourn the death of the cancer cells?

Bin Laden killed thousands of Americans and may have been plotting to kill thousands, maybe millions, more. I would rather celebrate their lives than regret his death.
02:43 AM on 05/04/2011
Gag me with a tampon. You smarmy people are too much. It is human and right to celebrate the death of a perpetrator. I am a poet and a pretty visible one and believe me, I'm not ashamed to exult over this. No one is glorifying anything; we're glad.
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onebluebrick
03:00 PM on 05/03/2011
I celebrate the death of no one. I don't have God''s permission.
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Ed Baker
All Hail Big Mother
04:31 PM on 05/03/2011
How would you get it? Hold a Séance? Dance a magic dance? Burn the magic powder?
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Myrna Minkoff
micro bio avec fromage
02:02 PM on 05/03/2011
I think people are feeling pride because there's not too much to cling to in that department nowadays. I wasn't happy to hear that Bin Ladin had been killed but I was glad that something promised was delivered. I was happy that the people who lost loved ones on 9/11 knew they had not been forgotten and the monster that brought so many innocent lives to and end was not being allowed to fade away quietly...planning his next attack.
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01:54 PM on 05/03/2011
No! what we saw, some of us, was that presiding spirit of self-worship (call it Patriatism) the same as ubiquitously displayed at baseball/football games, but more in-your-face and so nastily, at the last American Olympic games. And as hollow as it was thoroughly infantile, and at once in telling contrast to the end of World War 11, or even long before that, when the nation suffered a sneak-attack at Peal Harbor, and in the Newsreels of the time gave off flickering images of a crippled, and then wheelchair-bound President having been assisted to stand at the Rostrum and spoke in the unforgettably unmistakable Righteous of a whole nation.

Only a righteous America knew how to properly respond in kind to a vanquished and defeated foe.

There's is also many newsreels of the Nation's Armies parading in their lively ranks down Broadway, and there were pictures of them and all of us-or people in every newspaper and magazine like Life magazine in absolute unselfconscious celebration of our great Victory. And in none of the images did we see anyone act unseemly or even so much as put a foot wrong.
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02:16 PM on 05/03/2011
WE were attacked in WWII at Pearl Harbor---we invaded their countries for oil and minerals. Big difference.
Special Ops could have done what was done two days ago without sending troops to their death. We could have covered our own borders, ports, water supplies, ect (which are still very vulnerable) while Special Ops did their work. Not to mention our wealth as a country that could have provided Universal healthcare to every American, make SS fully funded---the list goes on.
If it gives you righteous indignation to beat your chest, do so. Karma has a funny way of coming back at ya.
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Ed Baker
All Hail Big Mother
03:53 PM on 05/03/2011
There isn't any oil in Afghanistan.
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boomer7391
Beliefs are the seeds of evil.
09:44 PM on 05/04/2011
sorry to burst your bubble of memories from a time long past....but....my dad created many of those newsreals during the war so i know for a fact that they were edited, how and why

there was no live reporter on the spot with a tv news chopper overhead back then to beam live into your home minute by minute anything

it was all edited
what you got was propaganda
you got to see what they wanted you to see, nothing more and nothing less

and that's the fact

today that's not the case, thank god, we don't need any sanitized versions of reality
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Lawson Meadows
Plant in your kids, the seeds of greatness!
01:35 PM on 05/03/2011
Elisha,

And I thought the Hatfield and McCoy feud was over... No, it is simply play out on a larger stage now. Because I am a member of the USA clan, I cannot help feeling an emotional reaction to the demise of one who admitted causing, then gloated about the death of so many, but, my reaction was remarkably mild, if my memory serves, compared to what it might have had ten years ago when I was in line with so many others, ready to gladly pull the trigger myself; national outrage was piqued by the sense of anger, despair, fear, and indignation, but I guess time allows perspective for some.

Maybe this is simply the way it will always be; focusing on past transgressions, being driven to avenge them under the guise of justice, and by so doing, fuel again the same from the other side: the cycle of revenge or justice, or whatever justification is used, will continue, many more will die, many more will celebrate in the streets, many more will die....

War, justice, and vengeance have been the way for so long; but ultimately, what price war, what price justice, and what price vengeance? Too much “eye for an eye” will leave both blind.

Honestly, I have only small hope that any change is in the wind, and for that I will eventually pass from this life saddened, because apparently we are OK with paying the price.

Lawson Meadows
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Ed Baker
All Hail Big Mother
03:54 PM on 05/03/2011
Right, it would have been better if we sat down with OBL, had some tea and petifors and discussed our feelings. :)
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Lawson Meadows
Plant in your kids, the seeds of greatness!
08:50 PM on 05/04/2011
Ed,

I wrote a pretty intense response to you concerning what I considered a shallow comment, but Huffpo apparently didn't like it. And that's OK, because after some thought, I believe you are on to something here... consider... if we had sat down with the parents and grandparents of those who are following OBL's cause, whether we had tea and petit fours, or Arabian coffee and sheer khurma, their children, the ones following him now, might not have been so inclined, because he would never been able to foment such discontent among them, and would have remained an angry, little man on the outside.

So maybe you have the right idea after all, if it is not too late.

Lawson Meadows
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Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.
Psychologist and Author of The Now Effect
04:53 PM on 05/04/2011
Thank you Lawson, I always appreciate your comments.
12:53 PM on 05/03/2011
Thank you for a post that helped me sort my emotions on this death. I was met with a bit of scorn last night when I commented in a group that I was having a difficult time celebrating any death.
As for the MLK quote, it doesn't matter to me where it came from, I just really liked it. Thank you again.
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kintarius
If you don't like it, you are wrong.
12:03 PM on 05/03/2011
"Deserves it! I daresay he does. Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement. For even the very wise cannot see all ends." - J.R.R. Tolkien
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Ed Baker
All Hail Big Mother
04:34 PM on 05/03/2011
How about this one? "Live by the sword, die by the sword."

He chose this for himself. I'm glad he's dead. I wish we could have killed him three times.
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kintarius
If you don't like it, you are wrong.
12:46 PM on 05/04/2011
Whatever makes you feel good. I'm not judging anyone or their opinions.

I like your choice of words though: "I wish WE could have killed him three times." Killing a person is no small thing and I doubt that you could do it yourself. People tend to talk big but when the moment approaches them, they aren't always able to back up their mouths.

All I was pointing out in my quote is that the judgement should be left to a higher power, not to people who just run around spewing what they think when they don't have any real idea as to what the consequences might be.
01:03 AM on 05/07/2011
Wonderful, kill him 3 times. Yet another marvellous, intelligent personal diatribe on how to dish out death. I've heard so many of these. What other ways might we have eviscerated him dead or alive? Oh please do tell...
11:53 AM on 05/03/2011
Compare this to hearing that Hitler was dead. Would you have celebrated then? I think so.
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Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.
Psychologist and Author of The Now Effect
01:19 PM on 05/03/2011
I'm not so sure you're correct here. Just the thought of Hitler dying would bring some peace to me, but I wouldn't be jumping in the streets laughing and chanting with jubilation. I'm sure if I was around during that time, deep sadness would also come to me at the same time in remembrance of all those who had suffered. That is really what I think I would've experienced.
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Ed Baker
All Hail Big Mother
03:55 PM on 05/03/2011
Great, now go and feel superior to everyone. :) I see you have your rectangular glasses, so you must think you're smarter than everyone too. :)
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02:19 PM on 05/03/2011
No---I would have cried with relief and hugged my fellow man and wept for those that had to suffer.