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Elizabeth Boleman-Herring

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Selling Mother's Louis Vuittons on eBay

Posted: 12/16/2011 2:39 pm

2011-12-15-HerringFamily25.jpg
My family and a Korean grad student, Chinatown, LA, c. 1955

This year, I've been "house-cleaning."

That's just one of The 99 %'s euphemisms for "turning one's home upside-down looking for primo stuff one can profitably sell online for cold hard cash."

(We have other euphemisms, if you're interested.)

In the process of scrounging through my worldly possessions, however, I've made some startling discoveries, and I'm not simply referring to the analog wonders that have turned up: a grandmother's entirely crystal-beaded evening clutch, featuring, I believe, dahlias. I'm certain someone in Arkansas or Iowa has an entire collection of these surprisingly pliable (like Slinkies, really) treasures.

There's also Aunt Willie Sue's (named for one of her father's old flames) demitasse collection -- another analog wonder. An upscale Italian coffee bar somewhere in the city should snap up these fragile wonders ("Made in Occupied Japan"; "Bavaria, Germany, US Zone"; "Fondeville, England," etc., etc.). Even a demitasse of chicory coffee must have been hard to come by in Seneca, South Carolina in the last world war.

But it's not the actual stuff that I've found to be such a revelation: it's the chasm-like difference between the life of my late mother (Elizabeth Janette Boleman Herring, 1920-1992), and my own existence that's come as something of a shock.

My mother gave birth to me at 30 -- late for the 1950s -- but not really that many years separated us. And yet, between the objects that defined her, and those that characterize me? Well, there seems to be an intergalactic-sized caesura.

Her death occurred at roughly the same time -- 1992 -- as that of this country's middle class. (I lost most of her money in the .com bust.)

Characteristically, she was doing pretty well with Stage 4 cancer until a small tumor appeared on her face. Then, much like Oscar Wilde, either that horrid wallpaper or she would have "to go." Visible tumors, if you were my Southern Belle of a mother, were not to be borne.

She was a daughter of South Carolina, and of Pasadena, back when Los Angeles was still a paradise for a certain stratum of Americans (and hell, of course, for others, as it remains).

She learned to drive at about the same time I was born (of sheer necessity), and never really mastered the skill. At the scene of her first fender-bender -- in Altadena -- she emerged from her little coupe with dark glasses, chignon and wide-brimmed hat all firmly in place. In four-inch pumps. Tears streaming down her face. The policeman produced a handkerchief.

Was there ever really such a time and place?

Now, I'm putting her Louis Vuittons -- some never used -- up for sale. The garment bag is large enough for precisely two Pucci dresses, Size 4.

The set of Hartman luggage -- which never saw the interior of a jet's cargo bay -- is going on eBay as well. Pristine pieces, with tiny little wheels, "stroller straps," and combination locks set to her birthday.

The fur coats -- we didn't think, we didn't know, OK, we were idiots -- are already sold. The "good jewelry" -- and there was so much of it, my parents were married for 35 years, and he was smitten with her -- has already gone. Newt and Callista have done a lot more to underwrite Tiffany's than my mother ever did but she did have some loot, none of which suits her only child, who took after her Danish, Quarterback father in terms of limb length and height, rather than her 5'2" mom.

On me, that delicate little Tiffany watch on its gold chain looked like a strand of tinsel on a Sequoia.

My mother wore four-inch-heels and over-the-elbow kid gloves through the 1970s. I'm keeping some of those shoes, all of those butter-soft gloves. She wore and wore them and yet there's no wear on them to speak of. Nor on the hats -- most sold now, or given away before I left The South for good.

There's even a china "hair collector," an object with a removable top and a little opening into which my mother placed the hair she removed each night after brushing out her long black tresses. She used it to "fatten up" her Merle Oberon chignon, which she wore under an invisible net, held in place on the nape of her neck with beautiful Spanish and Mexican silver-and-turquoise combs.

She never changed her hairstyle.

She was a kind, gentle woman with a very straight back, a fierce social activist, a voracious reader, the wife of a therapist, without whose editing skills he would never have written a comprehensible sentence, a frustrated author, one of the first two women in her family to attend college (though both would marry before finishing degrees) ...

... and thoroughly middle class. Upper middle class. Down to the Spectator pumps and up to the real pearls (the real pearls, which are going on eBay, too).

And I must say, I treasure those of her possessions I will keep, and am grateful to have been left the treasures I will now part with to buy necessities. And I don't want to go back to all that ironing, and those girdles and saggy silk stockings, and the Chanel make-up, and the Dior red lipstick.

But, too, I never, ever want to forget what a work of art Mother was ... and I'm sure that that Altadena policeman, if he's still around, still remembers the Merle Oberon lookalike he had to ticket back in 1955 -- not one hair out of place, but tears and black mascara everywhere.

 
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Bleedin Taxes
My micro-bio is empty... they taxed it to death
04:24 PM on 12/20/2011
It's nice to read a story about love and grace especially this time of year when families are gathering for the holidays. You must have had so many mixed emotions when deciding to sell her belongings. It's hard to let go sometimes but if you can do good with the money made from the sale then it's time to clear out the closets. And some lucky bidder wouldn't be buying them if they didn't value the items. I think it would be nice to include notes with the items giving their history. Like on Antiques Roadshow how they always ask about the history. I think most buyers would like that.
06:31 PM on 12/21/2011
That's a great idea, BT: gives "provenance" some heart to add to its history.
01:02 PM on 12/20/2011
What a beautiful story. I wish everyone had such loving memories of their mother. However, the author never did mention if she was a good mother or just a very stylish one.
01:08 PM on 12/20/2011
She was the best: style AND substance, teryflwr4u.....
01:47 PM on 12/21/2011
Some things are evident by the context. That this mother was a good mother goes without saying. The evidence? The obvious love of the child for the mother. Though "all" children love their mother, there comes a point when the "bad" mother loses the respect of her children. Clearly, the author has tremendous respect for her mother, still, years after her passing.
Good article. My own mother sent the link to me just a day after she sat down with me to inventory her Louis Vuitton luggage, wallet, key cases, etc. And the jewelry. And the gloves...
04:03 PM on 12/21/2011
Thank you for your thoughtful reply. A child's love for a mother is a beautiful thing. I hope you and your mother have a very positive experience with the ultimate divesting of your mother's things. Possessions are just that. Love is the best.
06:35 PM on 12/21/2011
LL, that's heartwarming. My mother "came of age" in the Great Depression. Married at 19, she was given her first "new" dress by her husband. Things meant a great deal to her for a very short time much later in her life, when she came into serious money; but the loss of the love of her life, early, and then cancer . . . well, things never meant much to either of us in the light of those great realities. Cherish your mother while you both walk the planet; AND after there is only one of you here.... Best, eb-h
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patric9956
FUD buster
11:26 AM on 12/20/2011
Cool, might as well use your column for a little free advertising and perhaps sweeten the auction return also. Nice way to use your dear departed mom to make a buck. Of course it wouldn't have occurred to you to post these w/o fanfare now, would it? I hope the folks on ebay get a steal (that is if you honor the auction results that is).
12:27 PM on 12/20/2011
Hey at least she did not include a link to the junk on Ebay or is that coming next do you suppose?
01:10 PM on 12/20/2011
NOT coming at all, rareearth. Keep reading me: you'll get a better sense of who I am. The $$$ for whatever I can sell is going to friends in Greece, not that I deserve kudos for that. I'm too old for seeking empty kudos. I think.
01:24 PM on 12/20/2011
p-56: you have a wide streak of cynicism in there, alas. I'm a WRITER: I write about my life. It's not "fanfare": it's conversation with, mostly, friends.
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patric9956
FUD buster
07:07 PM on 12/20/2011
Touche. If your motives are pure then I retract my comment. It's conditional. Take care.
11:25 AM on 12/20/2011
My mother is a "southern lady" and her outlook and attitude continue to influence me to this day. She was always fiercely independent, unafraid to tackle new challenges and so enjoyed learning new skills. Now in an assisted living facility, I miss that spirit and pride. I also miss the woman she was but feel so lucky to be her daughter. Please favor us with more articles about your mother; this one brought back such precious memories of mine. Thank you so much.
01:31 PM on 12/20/2011
Thank YOU, GG, and hug your mother for me: she has to stand in for two now.
10:12 AM on 12/20/2011
This whole article sounds like a promo for the ebay auctions to increse biddding. The mother/daughter thing sounds like just the selling strategy.
01:11 PM on 12/20/2011
I think that's YOUR inner self talking; not mine. Projection's not a virtue, sometimes, happyjoyjoy.
06:11 PM on 12/20/2011
A tad defensive Liz?
Me thinks thou doth protest too much.
p.s. bragging about LV this and LV that is not a virtue either. How about you brag about selling those pricey bags and donate the money to a homeless shelter. Then I'd be impressed.
09:49 AM on 12/20/2011
Yes those Louis Vuittons do last as witnessed by the fact that she can sell them on ebay and they are no doubt in great condition. I too was born in the 50's and my Mom was also 30. She is still with us, and still dresses in heels and jewelry. She would be appalled at me running to the store sans makeup and in sweats. I do get dressed up quite a lot, she taught me well. Thanks for a great article. I think I will call my Mom right now.
01:08 PM on 12/20/2011
I too was born in the 50's when my Mom was 25 years old. Her second of 3 children. My Mom really didn't have any sense of style or taste. She came from a very humble background where money was always tight. She never had the opportunity to learn from her mother, since her mother died at a very young age. The orphanage she landed in didn't teach much style and grace. Yet, in spite of all she endured as a child, she became a wonderful, loving, caring mother whose family was the most important thing in the world to her. I am lucky to still have her in my life and honor her for being a great mother.
01:11 PM on 12/20/2011
Thank you, Twingit. My mother thanks you, too. You GOT IT.... Some readers did not, as you can see.
06:21 PM on 12/20/2011
Enjoying the 15 minutes of fame?
BTW, everybody who has written a novel thinks theirs will be a best seller....lol.
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k535panther
And now for something completely different
09:45 AM on 12/20/2011
to bad to few women posses the taste and class your mother had, those days are far gone... try and find a woman today that wears a hat??
01:13 PM on 12/20/2011
Lots and lots of Southern women wear hats. There's a great book out--5yrs old or so?--about Southern Church Ladies' hats. Worth the price of admission. Thanks for the good energy k535panther....
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k535panther
And now for something completely different
03:02 PM on 12/20/2011
How Ironic to get a reply, I was just thinking about the photo of your mother and how beautiful she was, to me the epitome of class and grace. Indeed a very lovely woman. There is that "something" that your mother had that comes across in the photo. You just don't find that today, it' seems like such an old school thing, you know..a certain refinement, quiet elegance... fortunately for me my fiancee' has it..took me awhile but I found it... now If I could just get her on the hat thing....LoL
08:51 AM on 12/20/2011
I absolutly LOVE this piece! It captivated me from the begining! I only hope to be written about and remembered so lovingly by my daughter even in the objects I dorned.
01:14 PM on 12/20/2011
The objects remain; the scent of Chanel No. 5 remains; her love remains. Your daughter WILL remember you the way I remember mine: as my guide to . . . it all.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
smp276dp
free us from the craziness
08:38 AM on 12/20/2011
Like the old song by the Interuders goes. One of my all time favorite songs. I'll always love my mama she's my favorite girl, I'll always love my mama she brought me in this world.
If you never heard it before please indulge at least once. Link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CA17LOabVGs
01:14 PM on 12/20/2011
Thank you: I WILL go right there now.....
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
smp276dp
free us from the craziness
01:26 PM on 12/20/2011
Enoy
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Connie Murray
08:22 AM on 12/20/2011
Your mother sounds like a delightful lady as do you. I hope you will keep some of her things as a remembrance of her. Your mothers sounds a lot like mine, missed terribly and never to be replaced.
08:10 AM on 12/20/2011
While your post was creatively written, I think it's sad that you're selling your mother's items. Perhaps it would be nice to hold onto things of your heritage for the next generation. Simply selling because it wasn't your style or fit you is an insult to the memory of your mom. As a parent, we wish to give things to our children so that they will have more than we did. It seems like you need the "cold hard cash" more than keeping the items you say you so cherish.
09:56 AM on 12/20/2011
I think you missed the point that the writer is having to sell these items because she is a 99er and needs the money. Like millions of others you sell everything off slowly but surely to keep food on the table and a roof over your head for as long as you can. I realize that she is a writer but I am sure writing for the internet does not pay well at all. She is a wonderful writer and I hope someday she writes a best seller I am sure I will enjoy reading. Until then I hope she gets a good price for the items she must part with.
01:34 PM on 12/20/2011
Dear "me": writing for the internet doesn't pay . . . at all. I've written since I was 3, because that's what I am: a writer. And I HAVE just written a novel I feel will become a bestseller. leave it to me to wait till I'm 60 to finally get it together. Thank you for your spirited, right-on defense. The money, by the way, is earmarked for friends starving in Greece, right now.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
IRGrannyGoo
When it's hard to pray, pray hard.
10:25 AM on 12/20/2011
Oh, can you imagine what one's house would look like if everyone kept all their parent's belongings and passed them down? ALL of it? I have several pieces that came to the US on the boat when my ancestors sailed from England, I have a chair set that my great grandmother received as a wedding gift, a special bowl from my grandmother. Small pieces, which it sounds like this author is doing...keeping the special pieces and selling the rest.
01:26 PM on 12/20/2011
IRG, you're right. The treasures (many "worthless") will be with me, and go on to my cousins (no children, alas), when "I go on." The rest of it? The rest of it, like my body itself, was meant to be ephemeral.... Thanks for taking the time to write in.
07:26 AM on 12/20/2011
It is always nice to hear that somebody cared about their parents. We hear to many stories of how rotten a childhood we had. I had a very idyllic childhood and I know it was all due to the way I was raised in a moral, loving household. This time of year brings back all the good memories you have of your childhood. My mom has been dead since 2000 and we all miss her. Mothers are the heart of the home.
01:18 PM on 12/20/2011
She is still with me, I believe, every moment.....she, and what she stood for: grace, dignity, responsibility, beauty. Hard act to follow, for sure.
07:13 AM on 12/20/2011
I love handbags but Louis Vuitton, Fendi, Gucci, Valentino, etc. are a huge waste of money in my opinion, even on ebay. Especially as I get older, I wonder what was I thinking to spend thousands on a handbag?????? I needed my head examined!
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LivelyLexie
Don't panic.
07:53 AM on 12/20/2011
While it is overly expensive, the quality really can't be beat.
11:39 AM on 12/20/2011
The quality is good but I don't carry the same bag long enough to pay that much for that much quality...lol
01:19 PM on 12/20/2011
It was another time, another galaxy, far, far away....
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
ThatIsJustGreat
07:09 AM on 12/20/2011
What a nice article. My own mother passed on in 1999. I still have her favorite pair of kid gloves. And her pearls. In dismantling her house I found the same thing as you did.....her life is not my life. I finally sold the silver flatware on eBay after they sat in the closet unused for several years. Thank for the trip down memory lane. I miss her still.
01:20 PM on 12/20/2011
Still have the flatware. Grape scissors! Grape scissors, in 2011!!!! How the world has changed. I watch "Dr. Zhivago," the scene of the massacre, and Zhivago's face taking it in: the time for sterline grape scissors? Over, for the foreseeable future. We need jobs, bread, health care, etc., now....
03:01 AM on 12/20/2011
Please be careful selling expensive items on eBay.

Unfortunately selling high dollar items on eBay is now very risky. Ebay no longer supports casual sellers when "buyers' scam them with false claims through PayPal.

An eBay "buyer" can say that the Vuitton pieces are not what they wanted. Ebay/PayPal will tell them to return the item to the seller with Delivery Confirmation. The "buyer" can ship anything, magazines, rocks, dirt, anything to the buyer. If the package shows as delivered with "Delivery Confirmation", the buyer will get a refund of their PayPal payment. It is then up to the seller to contact law enforcement to try to get paid for the item.

Sad that eBay is being so mismanaged. It was once a great thing.
01:22 PM on 12/20/2011
J, you're right. Since writing this article, I've thought about high-end consignment shops in NYC. I also have a friend who has a friend who works at Vuitton. I can't just let these things "go," trusting the market as it is. So, thanks for the reminders.....