THE BLOG
05/14/2014 04:57 pm ET | Updated Jul 14, 2014

Where Did My Super Cape Go?

Just spending a few minutes on Facebook, Pinterest or Instagram makes me realize I'm surrounded by super moms. I really don't mean to, but I end up comparing myself to these moms. Where did my super cape go?

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I've tried to do crafts with my kids, but it ends up being more stressful than enjoyable. Spilled glue, tiny little pieces of paper scattered on the floor, paint smeared on hair and face. It's exhausting. How do these super moms craft with their kids? Adorable little creations, with perfect lighting to snap memorable pictures of smiling faces. I missed the super cape for crafting (and photography!).

I don't necessarily want to get into the baking, but if crafting is a challenge, baking is the Olympic Sport of chaos in my home! When I'm in the kitchen, I just want to "get it done." I don't love to cook or bake, I just like to eat. Extra helpers throw me off, "Careful with that!" "You are about to spill!" "How did the dough end up on the floor?" I do have one rule, when I am in the kitchen, everyone is out unless there is a simple task they can help with while sitting at the table. How do super moms bake with their kids and keep their smiles on? I missed the super cape for baking.

I'm also a horrible housekeeper. One of the worst I suspect. For some reason I have this self-imposed expectation that I should have my laundry caught up, my dishes done, the house picked up. The super moms seem to be doing it, but I have no idea how they take care of their homes and keep them spotless in the midst of raising their children. I missed the super cape for housekeeping too.

I also don't have the time nor the energy to look like I am ready for a photo shoot every day. I wash my face in the morning and pull my hair in a braid; maybe if it happens to be a "good hair day" I let it down. Some days I put on some makeup. I wear my jeans for several days until they really need to be washed, and t-shirts are standard. How do super moms get to look so good all the time? Their outfits are amazing (although I have wondered the practicality of some of those), they same to have good hair days all the time, and their makeup is flawless. They seem so put together. Their kids are often just as fashionable... and clean! I missed the super cape for style.

But this is what I have not missed. I have not missed reading books and opening new worlds to my kids. I have not missed dancing in the living room and spinning around until I can no longer stay up. I have not missed sharing stories with them about their family legacy, of how I grew up in Mexico, or how their dad grew up in Montana. I have not missed the tears, or the fears, or the nights when it is hard to sleep. And I have yelled, and I have spent too much time behind a screen, and I have made mistakes and broken their hearts, but I have not missed the opportunity to apologize and ask for their forgiveness, to let them know that I am broken, but I love them with all my strength and fierceness.

So it's okay if I don't get a cape to be a super mom. I just want to be the best mom I can be to my kids. To be always present in their lives, to make them feel loved.

This post first appeared on ellenstumbo.com