Maverick! The John McCain Theme Song

For years -- or is it centuries? -- we've been hearing that John McCain is a "maverick." We know it must be true because all the mainstream media say it, and the reason the mainstream media say it is because it must be true.

Still, two questions remain:

1. What is a maverick?

If you ask me, by which I mean, the American Heritage Dictionary, it's "an unbranded or orphaned range calf or colt, traditionally considered the property of the first person who brands it." (!!) Or, alt., "a horse or steer that has strayed from the herd," which is to say, "one who refuses to abide by the dictates of his group; a dissenter."

2. Why doesn't John McCain, the maverick, have a theme song?

Now, at last, he does, as follows. But first, for readers either too young or too old to remember the original, go here.

Yes, that one, from the great (if memory serves) show starring the incomparable James Garner as Bret Maverick, a roaming professional gambler too sensible, or vain, or lazy, or something, to willingly play the hero, but who somehow always ended up doing so anyway. It was half Western and half comedy and totally fun.

But that was then. This is now:

Strolls through a Baghdad market square
Maverick is McCain
Five helicopters in the air
Soldiers all around him
Tells us it's no strain.

Sunni or Shia, he don't care
Maverick is McCain
Long as the troops are over there
It's not too important
How long they remain

(Chorus)
Givin' the rich their breaks
Lettin' the poor eat cakes
It's economics that he can't explain
Family smeared by thugs
Then he gives Bush some hugs
Maverick is the legend of McCain

Questions if condoms block disease
Maverick -- that's McCain
Best way to stop them s.t.d.'s?
Teach i.d. in science,
Keep sex from the brain.

Held Jerry Falwell out of reach
Maverick -- yeah, McCain
Then gave a nice commencement speech
Praise for Hagee's backing
Turned into disdain.

(Chorus)
Overturn Roe v. Wade!
Keepin' them lobb'yists paid!
Gays wanna marry, let 'em go complain
Talkin' straight, true and blunt
Callin' his wife a cunt
Maverick is the legend of McCain
Maverick is the legend of McCain!

Crossposted at What HE Said.

Comments

[jollyelle]

Theme song for McCain, i like the old fav of Hall&Oates.......... Out of Touch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4UDm48ImL9w

"We're soul alone
and soul really matters to me............"

[rbloom]

Well, McCain is not the first faux Maverick in politics, or even the best. Back in the '80s, Jack Kelly, who had played Bart Maverick (older brother of Jim Garner's Bret Maverick) in the TV series, served as a city councilman and mayor in Huntington Beach, CA. He was known for holding court from his booth at Maxwell's, a steak-and-red-leather restaurant at the base of the Huntington Beach pier, and for five-minute ad lib speeches in coucil meetings that could be one long run-on, jargon-laden, stream-of-consciousness sentence -- they were kind of James Joyce meets Norm Crosby with touch of Huey Long, all after a couple of martinis.
Anyway, Jack was a lot of ego and bluster and was a reliable pro-development vote, but he had an undeniable rough charm, told some great stories and was clearly enjoying himself. He was a lot more fun than Johh McCain.

[BlueOnBlue]

He already has a theme song and you don't have to change the lyrics...

Waist deep in the Big Muddy
And the big fool says to push on.
Waist deep in the Big Muddy
And the big fool says to push on.
Waist deep! Neck deep! Soon even a
Tall man'll be over his head, we're
Waist deep in the Big Muddy!
And the big fool says to push on!

[Sciguy]

Looks great, but I can't sing along - the theme from Rawhide has been stuck in my head lately... :-)

[wldnswmmr]

It's even funnier when you sing it out loud, very loudly, as I just did.