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Emily Bennington

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The Worst Career Advice Continually Given to College Seniors

Posted: 04/22/10 11:34 AM ET

It's graduation season and you know what that means, right? More unsolicited career counsel from people like me. Does it ever just start to sound like white noise? If so, tune it out.

That's right.

There's really nothing new you can learn at this point, and most of the advice is just warmed-over versions of the same old stuff you've been reading for years anyway. Honestly, do you really need to be told - again - what not to post on Facebook? If you want to upload a photo of yourself downloading dinner in the back of a cab, go right ahead. No one will notice and, if they do, they'll probably think it was as funny as you did when you sobered up.

While you're at it, hit the diner at 3am and be sure to chase your sugary cocktails with caffeine and bacon. What's another five pounds when you're already sporting the Freshman 19? (See, you're overachieving already!) Besides, it's not like they're grading you on appearance in the interview or anything.

But don't get too fat, though, because that would defeat the whole purpose of looking hot at work. Ladies, are you with me? The best way to be taken seriously in a professional setting is to look high maintenance, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with wearing your killer "Girl's Night Out" dress in the office. (Just be sure to tone it down with a blazer or something, okay?) And fellas, business or not, if a coworker catches your eye in that dress, by all means point it out in front of as many colleagues as possible. Trust me, she'll view it as a compliment.

Also, if you're still hunting for post-grad jobs at the moment, don't settle for anything too entry-level. Recession or not, you've just spent four years and five figures learning how to be a leader and deserve to flex those skills from day one. That means no data entry, no errands, no taking messages, and absolutely no refilling the copy paper. 72% of the American public doesn't have a college degree, so let them fetch coffee. That's not why you went to school.

Likewise, your compensation package should adequately reflect this new graduate status. Depending on your degree of course, you can expect to start somewhere in the upper five figures with rapid advancement opportunities and a performance review in six months. By the way, if there's no mention of your work space during negotiations, don't worry. Your new team wants to surprise you with an office on your first day. (Shhh.... That's a newbie secret you did NOT hear from me.)

Finally, be aware that your new company should have prepared for your arrival in detail so you will most likely have a thorough orientation outlining your specific responsibilities. Once you're ready to hit the ground running, though, you'll be assigned a mentor who will show you the ropes and take a personal interest in your success. P.S. If you're smart, you can have her job in two years. Welcome to the workforce, baby!

 
 
 

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It's graduation season and you know what that means, right? More unsolicited career counsel from people like me. Does it ever just start to sound like white noise? If so, tune it out. That's right. ...
It's graduation season and you know what that means, right? More unsolicited career counsel from people like me. Does it ever just start to sound like white noise? If so, tune it out. That's right. ...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Michael Monje Jr
10:45 PM on 04/29/2010
lol@all the stuff that never happens unless you major in engineering.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
eddiestardust
12:55 PM on 04/27/2010
My advice...

Don't take a lot of so called "advice" seriously.

Try to learn something about the company, look sharp, be nice and do the best you can.

After the interview:

Ask yourself:

WHAT'S NEXT?

Meaning of course, it's time to move onto the next interview.
Don't get too hung up on your dream job, you never know which one will give you the offer.

And if you do get an offer...TAKE IT!

Fact is that today, there are a heck of a lot of folks wanting a full time job as about 17% of us don't have one.

So, just keep plugging away:)
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Joe Moore
English Teacher in Japan
03:09 AM on 04/27/2010
My advice to recent college grads: Spend an easy $200 get your TEFL or TESL certifications and leave the country to go teach English abroad. In the Asian markets you will find good paying jobs in Japan and Korea & now China! Great way to explore the world, travel, learn a new language, and use the income to pay down those college loans!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Bonaboman
08:13 PM on 04/26/2010
The best advice for anyone going to college is, take the most difficult subjects you can, even if you major in "studies" take as many stat and IT classes as possible, and grades are not everything they are the ONLY thing. A "studies" major with college algebra, finite math, statistics, advanced statistics, calculus, differential equations and a 3.5 GPA or greater, trumps a "studies" major who was the leader of the effort to reestablish the SDS and Weather Underground on campus.
11:41 PM on 04/26/2010
As a Humanities major, I completely disagree. Why would I subject myself to stats and IT when it has absolutely NOTHING to do with my chosen career profession. A person might as well just major in Business if that is all of the classes they are going to be taking.
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eddiestardust
12:49 PM on 04/27/2010
Not everyone is good at Math
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ShanniC
For truth, justice, and the 'merican way!
05:59 PM on 05/02/2010
Not everyone is INTERESTED in Math. I also agree with ilovemyprez, why invest in courses that have no bearing on your future profession?
02:39 PM on 04/26/2010
I wasn't sure if this was satire or serious advice. I should read it again. Later.
08:24 AM on 04/26/2010
excellent advice for the greatest generation, but wasn't all this stuff covered in the baby einstein video series?
09:17 PM on 04/25/2010
The greater the number students "going to college" the greater the surplus of graduates there will be. Many will not achieve work they aspire to. The surplus of graduates will lower the wages of those who actually DO achieve the work they want.
04:36 PM on 04/23/2010
This article reeks of arrogance in the same fashion as those it seeks to critique. I think it is easy to find this tone funny for those who are older and didn't graduate during such bleak times.

Oh, kudos on the book and 800+ twitter followers Emily, you seem like quite the success yourself.
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WYHKTai-Tai
Wyoming, Hong Kong, Tai-Tai
08:57 AM on 04/26/2010
I thought it was very witty. And actually the back-handed way it was presented, intimated to me that this crop of graduating students are NOT the ones with this entitled mind-set. Perhaps the grads of the past several years, but the world changed in 2008, & they know it. It would have been biting to the grads if written a few years ago.

It actually seemed more like a slam at the people who are consistently slamming THEM for not getting that they have to start at the bottom.

maybe it's just me, but that's what I saw in it.
04:25 PM on 04/23/2010
As a career counselor, I see this advice as dangerous, the reality is that in this job market, new grads don't have the leverage to demand what you are recommending.

Regarding the following quote, "72% of the American public doesn't have a college degree, so let them fetch coffee. That's not why you went to school." This kind of elitist, smug crap is what your selling to new grads? Wow. I'm beyond words at how offensive this is.
04:32 PM on 04/23/2010
Apologies, I just read this again and see you are kidding about the advice in your post. I'm so relieved!
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Emily Bennington
Career Author / Speaker
08:18 PM on 04/23/2010
Yes. Of course kidding....
01:47 PM on 04/22/2010
This is a very funny article but many people will not read it because of the headline. I know that the author does not write the headline, but somebody does! I would like to see readers add to the list of advice items. Here is my modest contribution: "Please remember that at work in 2010 you are not there to make friends, only enemies. Every one at work is your enemy including the kid in the mailroom. Treat them accordingly and you will rise quickly up the corporate ladder." OK, I said it was modest!
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Emily Bennington
Career Author / Speaker
04:24 PM on 04/22/2010
Haha. Love it. Actually, I did write the headline. ;-O