College is so many shades of awkward and so many types of embarrassing -- here is a selection of words with no English equivalent, but which perfectly describe phenomena endured by every college student.
1. Tartle, Scottish -- The awkward pause when introducing someone whose name you've completely forgotten.
Note: This is a common occurrence at frat parties. If you are the perpetrator of a tartle, you will most likely not be going home with the girl you flirted with for three hours and then blanked on her name.
2. Jayus, Indonesian -- A joke that is so unfunny and poorly told that everyone laughs.
Note: Jayus can stem from the lingering embarrassment of a tartle. Typically, if someone has tartled and then chimes in with a jayus, he will be given shifty looks until he goes home already.
3. L'esprit de l'escalier, French -- When one thinks of an awesome comeback just after the opportunity has passed.
Note: Moments of "l'esprit de l'escalier" are common among college students, who will usually recognize the untimeliness of their comeback and choose to vocalize it anyway.
4. Kummerspeck, German -- Excess weight gained from emotional overeating.
Note: Not to be confused with all other genres of overeating that occur on college campuses -- see #6 below.
5. Shemomedjamo, Georgian -- To eat an entire food item -- a whole cake, pizza, burrito, etc. -- not because you are hungry, but because it tastes so freaking delicious.
Note: If you are an American college student, you might be wondering why Georgians have taken the time to attribute a word to something as common as eating an entire piece of food. This is because you are an American college student.
6. Age-otori, Japanese -- To look worse after a haircut.
Note: This is a word to be used liberally around a) students sporting mullets and or rattails b) students with iced tips c) white students who get cornrows on tropical cruises.
7. Pelinti, Buli -- When food is so hot you can't swallow and have to shift the bite around in your mouth.
Note: On college campuses, pelinti is a rare and special occasion. The majority of cafeteria cuisine is served clammy or luke clammy.
8. Gigil, pronounced Gheegle; Filipino -- The urge to pinch or squeeze something unbearably cute.
Note: This phenomenon is typically benign, unless you are my roommate who is currently scrolling through her 10,000th photo of cats dressed as historical figures.
9. Seigneur-terraces, French -- People who sit in coffee shops for an extended period of time without spending money.
Note: If you are being a seigneur-terrace, remember that in a few years, after having graduated from college with a major in linguistics and etymology, you will more likely than not be working at that coffee shop. Don't be a signeur-troll -- buy something to eat.
10. Tingo, Pascuense -- To borrow objects one by one from a neighbor until there is nothing left.
Note: Tingo occurs when college students borrow beer from the party next door until the keg runs out and there is nothing left except another night of embarrassment and another day of befuddlement.
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