Humor

At 6:34 p.m., your mom buckles you into the back of the Range Rover. She drives to the first neighbor's house and waits in front of it until precisely 6:37 p.m., when she gives you permission to unbuckle and go up to the first door.

In an effort to better understand the reality of how distant Barbie is from the average woman, I created a parody featuring what her breasts might look like at her current age of 55-years-old. It's a sad, sad truth but as women age, their breasts go south.

Many of society's favorite psychoactive compounds, both legal and illegal, work by hijacking our own neurotransmitters and brain receptor sites. In other words, they aren't creating something out of nothing -- they only work because our brains are set up to get high and feel pleasure.