Love & Relationships
When someone is the giving type, they get genuine and utter happiness when they give or do something for someone that they love and care for. Unfortunately, there are times when we shouldn't give to others or be so selfless. As well, and even more so, there are times when we shouldn't go out on a limb or out of our way for others. In plain English, and as simply as I can put it, not everyone deserves your love. Givers are not robots. They're not just some naive thing that are meant to do kind things for others without a reward or at least some sort of reciprocation. I don't believe in giving with motives. However, I do believe in people being decent, appreciative, and reciprocated love, effort, and balance when it comes to giving.
Let's use an example of baseball. All players get to play the position that they're best at. However, in case you've never noticed and aren't a big baseball fan, everyone gets to hit the ball. That's the fun part! Well, in my analogy it is. So you see, every player gets a chance to hit the ball and strive for a home run. This is why the hard helmets came into play. All of the teammates used to get mad at the batter for swinging so much and not taking turns. They needed the helmets to protect themselves. The other players would get angry at the batter for being so selfish and greedy. Seriously though, people take turns on a team. That's why it's called a team. Otherwise, a baseball team would be called baseball player. The same goes for in relationships. In relationships, there's give and take. Everyone deserves to be given to, and just the same, everyone needs to be able to receive. For people that struggle with receiving, that's another story (read: "The Power of Being Able to Receive").
Someone that's a true giver loves to see other people happy, and even more so, when it's someone that they love. As well, they usually want nothing in return. Unfortunately, this is why so many people get used these days. Some people are such givers that they won't even care if and when someone were to take advantage of them when they do others favours. However, I'm sure that every giver has to draw the line at some point when their love, effort, and time is never reciprocated. Having said that, some givers draw the line way too late, and will give anything and everything they can to make a person happy. This is why it's so important to recognize when someone is a taker. We all need to be cautious and aware when someone is a taker. They will take advantage of others, and you can usually see the signs early on. In order to find out, you should give with caution when you notice that you're the only one giving in situations. Love is supposed to go both ways. One person should never be the only one giving in a relationship.
Remember, don't be an easy target for someone to take advantage of. You need to love and respect yourself, know your self worth, and know that it's okay to say no to doing things for someone. It's okay not to offer your kindness, your love, your time, attention, and putting so much effort into everything. There should be a Hallmark holiday for all of the givers in the world. It's time for the givers to stop giving when love and kindness are never reciprocated. There should be more balance in the world when it comes to giving. I'm obviously not referring to helping people in need like the homeless or less fortunate. By all means, give, give, give to them. Never ask anything in return for those types of actions, and kindnesses. The types of giving that I've been referring to in this article are more so the types of relationships that are one-sided, and when one person is doing all of the giving. It's imperative that there is balance in relationships, and that love, effort, and giving goes both ways.
Forcing yourself not to give or do something for someone is hard to do when you're a giver. However, when you know that someone will take advantage of you, you shouldn't give. Especially, when you foresee them wanting more and more in the future. It's important to recognize when someone has certain characteristics of a taker, and even more so, when they have a track record of such, that they would do something of the sort like take advantage of someone when given a helping hand, etc. If you find yourself in a situation or scenario as such, you need to be strong, learn to say no when they ask for favours, and don't offer things when you know how they are.
Not everyone is a giver. Many, if not most people are takers, and only want for themselves. Humans are selfish, greedy, and takers since the time of birth. We're all born with an evil inclination. We're supposed to learn when we're young how to share and be giving. We should learn to thrive in the happiness and joy of others. We should all grow and try to improve throughout our lives into becoming more kind-hearted, and enlightened individuals. Even if our parents or guardians never instilled these kindnesses into us as young kids. We are responsible for our own actions in life. We have the power to decide whether we want to be givers or takers. But still, even when we're givers, we should be weary of the takers, and not let them take advantage of us. It's a beautiful thing when someone is a giver at heart. But, it generally makes them more susceptible to being used by others. Just because someone has a giving heart doesn't mean that they shouldn't be cautious and choosy when it comes to giving to certain people. Not everyone deserves a person's love, time, effort, and attention. Some people will truly take advantage of the giving type, because they view them as an easy target.
Love & Relationships
Love & Relationships