If You Respect Your Barista, Don't Order The Unicorn Frappuccino

"I AM COVERED IN UNICORN BLOOD."
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The Unicorn Frappuccino that took over the Internet was finally available Wednesday and it was the worst day for Starbucks baristas.

Since the drink is only available until April 23, frapp-lovers rushed to their local Starbucks to get the decaf, sugar-filled drink. And while the frappuccino might look majestic and beautiful, baristas are not here for it.

Twitter user Braden Burson (@iambburson) begged the Internet to stop ordering the drinks in a hilarious angry rant. He said he’s a Starbucks barista and that he’s never made so many frappuccinos in his entire life.

Burson was not immediately available for comment — probably because he was making some colorful and sugary drinks.

“My hands are completely sticky, I have unicorn crap all in my hair and on my nose,” Burson yelled. “I have never been so stressed out in my entire life.”

These drinks are apparently pretty hard to make right after each other, based on Burson’s account of his day. A Unicorn Frappuccino is a non-caffeinated drink that has a mango syrup base, sour blue drizzle in the middle and vanilla whipped cream topping. And no one can forget about that sweet pink and sour blue powder.

Burson says it basically “tastes like a SweetTART.”

Fellow baristas were all about this rant and quickly seconded Burson’s rage.

Baristas replied to his rants with their own stories of woe. Most of them had to stay late and others just complained about how difficult they are to make back to back. One user referred to the drink as “the devil.”

And while most people still really want to try the drink some people have called “diabetes in a cup,” Burson may have actually gotten through to a few people.

Even if it is just so he’ll stop the whole Snapchat-and-driving thing he’s got going on.

Thankfully these majestic drinks are on a limited run, but it’s unclear if your favorite barista will make it through to the end.

So for anyone who’s ordering this anyway, remember to channel your inner unicorn and be kind to the people on the front lines of this war.

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