From double glazing to central heating, the annoying salesman might be a thing of the past
One of the things that is sure to strike fear into any householder is when there's a knock at the door and a besuited gentleman with slicked back hair asks you how long your windows have been in.
Whatever number of years you give them, they'll have an answer.
"Ten years? Ahhh, do you know these types need replacing after eleven, they might be a bit fragile already.."
Or
"Only five years? Well, did you realise that the beading used on glazing five years ago wasn't up to spec and could allow burglars to gain access..."
Or
"Only last month eh? And do they repel zombies? It's the new Euro specification standard you see..."
And what about heating? What about burglar alarms? What about electrics? What about anything to do with the house that might require tradesmen?
We've seen them on the telly, Matt Allwright chasing them down the street after they've just fleeced some old dear out of her life savings only to be caught peeing in the water tank by a secret camera.
Having anything done on the house is traumatic.
First, you have to find someone you might vaguely trust, then you have to sit and listen to them suck air in through their teeth while they mentally tot up how much it's going to cost.
Although it'll probably be cheaper if you sign up today.
"Let me just phone the boss to see if we can do a deal..."
It's horrible.
Why hasn't the Internet fixed this yet?
We can surely buy anything we like on the Internet now.
If I want to buy a fridge or a washing machine, I don't need to listen to someone waffle on to me about the advantages of having one with an integrated dehumidifying vegetable drawer, fully automatic self-calibrating wine cooler or a bar code reader that warns you when I’m out of quinoa.
I go online, I look at some nice fridges, and I order one.
Within a day, some nice men turn up and place it in my kitchen. We chat about how far they've travelled, the wonder of the gig economy and how much better flat white coffees are to cappuccinos.
Even if I want to buy a car, I can look up all the stock at the local dealership, then go and look at the exact car I want. I don’t have to deal with some tuppenny Arfur Daley who will try to sell me "a lovely example of a 2012 Vauxhall, I'll throw in flaps, mats and bidet."
But maybe the time of the salesman is finally up.
Maybe it's time to think again.
Maybe, just maybe, the Internet will finally see slicked back hair and silver suits banished to the history books?
Removing the need for an expert
The problem with many large installations in the home is that you often need an expert to give you some advice.
You can't just rock up to a kitchen shop and buy "that one." You need someone to measure up, maybe even design the layout and then tell you which sort of units you need. That adds to the cost.
It's the same with central heating or bathrooms.
What sort of radiator do you need? How many BTUs will it require (what's a BTU?!)
The Internet tries to offer answers to these questions in the form of useful FAQs (frequently asked questions), but often this simply means you're going to now have to spend time learning how to be a plumber.
Some help a bit more though. For example, soak.com is a website where you can buy your own bathroom suite, which includes radiators and showers and things like that.
This is where I realised I needed some BTUs. Still not entirely sure what they are, but this site at least lets me calculate how many of them I need.
I can then use this revelation to buy the correct radiator. Or something.
That's a step in the right direction, but only a small one.
Another company has gone further by helping you to design your entire central heating system.
Helpfully called "centralheating.com", this site actually allows you to draw the layout of your house, add windows and doors and then it will use some clever maths to decide what you need. Including those BTUs (I must look that up sometime).
It gives you a full list of the things you need to order. You can then find a local installer who can fit them. Yes, the actual fitting of radiators is still a skill that hasn't been mastered by Google yet.
So will salespeople ever be redundant?
It's unlikely that they'll ever completely go away.
What's more likely, is that they'll have to become more skilled.
This is happening already in a lot of industries.
Whereas it was often a disadvantage to be a salesman with too much knowledge of the product you're selling (some sales techniques preach "dumbing down" as a tactic), the savvy buyer is now often armed with questions to ask. And they need answers.
Salespeople now need to know what they're talking about.
We'll probably, therefore, see the back of the more annoying sales people. The ones who put profit before quality and are simply after a sucker who will hand over their savings the quickest will have to up their game.
And that's not a bad thing, is it?
*I’ve used the extremely sexist “salesmen” noun throughout because we all know that saleswomen are extremely good at their job and wouldn’t recognise themselves in this article.
Probably.