Hardcore hipsters probably don’t use the internet. It’s far too mainstream. But imagine if they did! What would their classified ads be like?
That lighthearted question was a hot Twitter topic over the weekend, as #HipsterClassifieds trended thanks to Seth Goodtime’s (@SethGoodtime) hashtag game, #TwoWeeksOfHashnight, hosted by Ronen P. (@BadRonen) and Kjerstin Krohn (@SwissMistress).
Join @swissmistress and myself for #HipsterClassifieds!#TwoWeeksOfHashnight pic.twitter.com/ypn6PkQe23
— Ronen (@BadRonen) August 26, 2016
Penny-farthing bicycles, a unicycle and an artisanal alarm clock (i.e. a cockerel) were all mockingly offered for sale or barter as tweeters across the world competed to come up with the most stereotypical hipster-esque posts.
“I thought it would be fun to envision what a hipster would be looking for or selling in a classifieds section,” Ronen P. told HuffPost on Sunday, before confessing he’s actually “half-hipster” due to his style but lack of cliched pretentiousness.
Here are some of the best posts we’ve seen so far:
#HipsterClassifieds Scarf barely been worn, hand made by my cat lady landlord. Size : Lenny Cravitz pic.twitter.com/ZRjnkvN32M
— Jenny B (@layingbackeatin) August 26, 2016
Wanted: people to form a band that will never play music so no one will ever have heard of us aside from ourselves.
— Ronen (@BadRonen) August 26, 2016
#HipsterClassifieds
Wanted: high performance lock for Penny Farthing bicycle. Must be able to secure both wheels. #HipsterClassifieds pic.twitter.com/ZWfHs2YjrD
— Mark Riter (@MarkRiter) August 26, 2016
For sale or barter: Unicycle for two. #HipsterClassifieds
— Cotton Candy Randi ™ (@randilynisin) August 26, 2016
#HipsterClassifieds Hipster restaurant staff needed. Must serve the food before it's cool... pic.twitter.com/xsr1G77jOJ
— Nathalie (@_Nath900) August 26, 2016
WANTED: An original copy of The Wizard of Oz, but only the black and white part. #HipsterClassifieds
— Seth Goodtime (@SethGoodtime) August 26, 2016
#HipsterClassifieds looking for old Japanese abacus so I can do my taxes pic.twitter.com/TtnKtW8dB7
— Jason Klingensmith (@klinger2069) August 26, 2016
#HipsterClassifieds
— TunaOfTheSky (@tunaofthesky) August 26, 2016
50 lbs of vegan beard fertilizer for trade; want bamboo fixed gear bicycle.
Need to find a new home for my organic hemp seed foot satchel. Must have references. No fascists #HipsterClassifieds pic.twitter.com/NBum7vF9WO
— Silence Dogood (@MrSilenceDo) August 26, 2016
BARBATE FLATMATE SOUGHT
— Brian Bilston (@brian_bilston) August 26, 2016
for hirsute hipster bachelor
Needs flip flops,
good sense of hummus
& ironic Star Wars spatula#HipsterClassifieds
#HipsterClassifieds Trade for Laying Hen: Artisanal, Hand-Raised Alarm Clock. 3AM Wake Up. @BadRonen @swissmistress pic.twitter.com/VPUopQKMUL
— The Hashtag Game (@TheHashtagGame) August 26, 2016
#HipsterClassifieds Free Range Human looking for apartment. I don't have money but I can pay in Irony.
— Ryan (@ryanztweetz) August 26, 2016
For sale - Table #HipsterClassifieds pic.twitter.com/5Ca1cR3GTs
— Stevie The # King (@superANGRYref) August 26, 2016
Catsitter Wanted: Must be vegan, anti-capitalist, and willing to accept payment in muffins.#HipsterClassifieds
— Just Call Me Mister (@MisterMetokur) August 26, 2016
Sorry Twitter. I only hand type my #HipsterClassifieds on a vintage Remington, stuff them into canning jars, and float them off to sea.
— Schultz (@JeremyJSchultz) August 26, 2016
Ugh. I'm so over the whole #HipsterClassifieds thing. I was into them when nobody else had even heard of them and they were achingly ironic.
— Tim Nicholls (@woodpunk) August 26, 2016
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