It is still “bone-chilling” for 37-year-old Sean Smith to listen to the 911 call he made in 1989 after accidentally shooting his little sister, Erin.
The siblings were 10 and 8 at the time and home alone after school. Sean had just found his father’s loaded .38 revolver hidden in a drawer when he went in search of video games, and before he even knew what was happening, the gun went off. Erin instantly fell to the floor, and a hysterical Sean called the police in an attempt to get help. That call was played on an episode of “The Oprah Winfrey Show” addressing gun control, and it sent shivers down viewers’ spines. For Sean, it still does.
The tragedy was declared an accident and no charges were ever filed. However, the guilt and the pain of killing his sister would continue to torment Sean. He is just now beginning to open up about the trauma from 27 years ago and recently spoke with “Oprah: Where Are They Now?” about the events of that day.
“I tried to give her mouth-to-mouth, but she wasn’t really responding at all,” Sean recalls. “I picked her up and sat her on my lap... The last [mental] picture I have is her dying on my lap.”
Sean later learned that Erin died instantly when the bullet traveled to her heart. In the years after the accident, he struggled.
“During my teenage years, I kind of took on this persona of someone very self-destructive ― ended up dropping out of school, got arrested a couple of times,” he says.
Things turned around for Sean after the birth of his son, who is now 16. “I completely quit drugs and alcohol,” Sean says. “He’s just an amazing kid ― and we have discussed guns. I wanted to make sure that he knew what had happened, to an extent, and... what to be careful of.”
He says he still struggles to cope with the pain of losing Erin.
“There are bad days,” Sean says. “Before, it would just turn me into just like this dark, depressed person. Thankfully, after a lot of soul-searching and going to church and talking to a therapist, it finally got to a point where I was able to make peace and forgive myself.”
Sean keeps reminders of Erin throughout his home ― her baby shoes, ribbons she won, drawings she did ― and also sports a memorial tattoo that his son helped design. Today, Sean says he tries to focus on the happy memories he had with Erin and continues to cherish their special bond.
“I can always feel my sister’s spirit with me,” he says. “I’m very grateful for where I am today.”
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