By Nadia Ghaffari, TeenzTalk Founder
“I’m so stressed.”
We all hear this phrase frequently, sometimes even multiple times a day. As a teen living in the Silicon Valley, I hear the word “stress” thrown around constantly, whether it’s in the school hallways or during extracurricular activities or in the midst of teen social life.
Though general stress is entirely different than a diagnosed mental illness–like clinical depression or anxiety–many similarities arise among these terms in conversation with teens. “Stress” is seen as a normalized and accepted form of being, within the adolescent population. Many of us use this generalized word to describe a spectrum of feelings, which may at times include feelings of depression or anxiety. For a teen, saying that you have anxiety or depression is scary–and also stigmatized–but it’s normal to say, “I’m so stressed”. Thus, we focus on “stress relief” and other wellbeing strategies, as these are normalized practices, and we’re comfortable interacting and dealing with “stress”. Knowing that “stress” strongly correlates with a wider range of mental health themes, we begin to shine light on these issues and open the discussion on mental health and mental illness.
While working on the global teen initiative, TeenzTalk.org, I came to a realization that “stress” is not a Silicon-Valley-specific issue. Rather, it’s a global matter. I’ve discussed mental health and wellbeing with teens from a diverse range of backgrounds, which has brought me to the conclusion that stress is a prevalent issue for all students, no matter where they are in the world.
However, stress can take on many different forms, especially outside of the Silicon Valley bubble. A 17-year old girl from Tanzania shared her story with me last summer. She told me about the pressure she felt to succeed, being the first in her village to receive a high school education and potentially go to college. She told me of her struggles living in poverty and working to have enough food on the table for herself and her family.
Another teen, a boy from China, told me about a particularly important stressor in his life. For years he had identified as gay, yet he could not bring himself to voice his true identity to his family or friends. Due to various social pressures and cultural expectations, he felt confined in barriers too great to overcome by himself. Thus, he remained silent until finally opening up to the world just a few months ago with the help of a supportive friend.
A 17-year old girl from Macedonia shared her battle with social anxiety. She talked to me about years of isolation, before realizing her fear of social situations and conversations were symptoms of a real, treatable mental illness known as ‘social anxiety’. She found relief in knowing she was not alone with this condition.
I’ve had the opportunity to meet with many teenagers and hear their stories. Clearly, we've all had experiences with vulnerability and discouragement, and it’s important that we grow from these experiences and strive to create a resilient community of activists. Our stories deserve to be heard, and our wellbeing deserves to be prioritized.
I recently met with Dr. Steven Adelsheim, clinical professor and child/adolescent psychiatrist at Stanford. He shared with me an invaluable piece of advice for all teens: "Reaching out to people early and sharing how we're feeling, not only helps you, but it helps those around you feel more comfortable talking about how they feel too."
Share your story on www.TeenzTalk.org and join us in our movement towards tackling stress, building resiliency, and spreading hope. Together we inspire growth.