This blog consists of a series of letters written to my friend, a Syrian refugee who has moved into my neighborhood. We have become close friends in spite of a language barrier. Love needs no language but there are things I wish I could tell her. I write these letters in hopes that one day she will be able to read them. I share in hopes that others will follow me on this journey and learn with me along the way.
More posts available: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/author/kathleen-jacobson
10/6/2016
My Dear Friend Safaa,
I have to write to you about your cooking. I had never had Syrian food before I met you although I had eaten some Middle Eastern foods such as falafel or baba ganoush. Recently, I have learned of towns nearby where there are clusters of restaurants with Middle Eastern fare. I tasted a range of foods when I was invited to Iftars in these restaurants to break the fast during Ramadan. It was all delicious but I have to say that by far the best food I have tasted was while sitting at your table.
I will never forget the first time you invited me to dinner. There was food all laid out on the table. The centerpiece of this was the Kibbeh that you made from scratch. I remember our funny attempts at communicating the ingredients of this delicious Syrian food. We were never able to find the correct English word but I know now that it is made with bulgur. They are similar to Spanish Empanadas in that they are stuffed with a flavored meat. You made a lemon chicken dish that was the best chicken I ever tasted. I think what I love as much as the food is sitting around the table with your entire family. We laugh and talk in English and Arabic. I don’t speak your language but for some reason I feel the words with my heart. I can tell by the look on your husbands face when he is teasing. What is served at these meals is love. There is love in the preparation of the meal. There is love in the interaction of your family and there is love in your inclusion of me as Auntie Kathleen.
“I don’t speak your language but for some reason I feel the words with my heart.”
One day after a long dentist appointment with your son, we returned tired and hungry and you had such a treat waiting for us to eat. I never could find the name of the dish you prepared but it was so beautiful in the spiral presentation of eggplant, tomato, potato and meat. I had never seen anything like it; it was a masterpiece. I tried to look up the name for this dish with the sounds I heard you say but I could not find any word similar. Your daughter told me the word is a combination of “to put in” and “dish”.
There is Pomegranate sauce for a wonderful salad called fattouch. I love the crunchy pita strips on the fattouch. I also enjoy the Zaatar made with dried wild thyme, ground sumac spice, sesame seeds, cumin and other spices that we eat with pita bread and oil. I have to admit that I always found falafel too dry until I tasted your homemade falafel.
Then there is the rice. I bet you wouldn’t believe that I don’t care for rice usually but I sure eat the rice that you make. It is seasoned so perfectly and with the toasted nuts on top it is irresistible. I ate so much of that rice the night we went to the park with some of your other Syrian friends. That night there was so much food laid out in pan after pan. We ate chicken, rice, and fattouch and dolmades until we were stuffed. I loved looking out over the grass to see the men side by side bowed in prayer as the sun went down. We sat under the moonlight eating, laughing and listening to Arabic music into the night. I smoked the Hookah with shisha and someone else smoked Hookah with tobacco and I thought to myself about how much my life has changed since I met you and your family. I thought about how full of joy I feel at times like these.
What is served at these meals is love
I am learning about Syrian Hospitality. Every time I come to your house I am presented with tea or coffee. Usually a plate of fruit, candy or cookies is placed in front of me. This is different for me because I am used to being asked if I would like something to drink. It seems it is your custom to serve it without asking. I have no idea what is polite so I just eat and drink what you give me. I never drink coffee except at your house. I like both kinds of coffee that you make; the thick Turkish coffee served in a demitasse cup and the sweet coffee. Your chai tea is great but I was most fascinated with the cumin tea with salt and lemon. I am hooked on that and even make it at home.
My dear friend, you teach me so many things. You let me into your life and I am part of your big wonderful family. I know you think I do so much for you but what you do for me is not so obvious. You share your table with me, you share your children, you share laughter and you feed me love. I have never been served anything so wonderful.
Thank you my friend!
Kathleen Jacobson
