Actor Gianni Russo, "The Godfather"
“Look at Justin Bieber, who is this kid really? And our young children are following him. He’s a ‘star’ or what? He’s a punk.” — Gianni Russo, played Carlo Rizzi in The Godfather
As I set out writing the book, “The Perfect Lie,” I decided I would explore the connection between self/public image and true happiness.
Why do we project an image for the world that doesn’t always match our truth? Elvis Presley said, “The image is one thing and the human being is another. It’s very hard to live up to an image.”
It’s time that we better understand the importance of image in our culture, how this shiny-faced trend has evolved, and the role of the entertainment industry in promoting a false self-image.
I called a friend with seventy-two years of experience, forty-six films under his belt, and who I knew would not hold back for the sake of social correctness: movie star Gianni Russo, best known as the wise guy son-in-law, Carlo Rizzi, from the classic blockbuster The Godfather.
Gianni is a no-nonsense guy: distinguished and rough-and-tumble at the same time. I never have to ask him, “Gianni, how do you really feel?” He will tell me straight the first time, and for that, he was a good source and place to start in this journey in understanding the social game-face and why our culture promotes a safety blanket of interpersonal distance.
“Good morning, Gianni. How are you?”
“Good, my love.” He’s such a lady’s man, ever the charmer. “I’ve been amazing, very busy, thank God. What’s going on?”
“I’m good, Honey. Like I mentioned to you on email, I’m writing about my history of depression from some years ago—something I’ve never wanted to talk about. I’m trying to get to the bottom of it. I hope it helps some people.” He’s silent and I’m starting to squirm. “Lately, I’ve been talking to people about it, and hearing their stories. Most have had depression at some point in their life.”
“Well, I never did. I’m your first person!” He’s so cheerful, and genuinely thrilled to be ‘my first’.
“Really?” I’m surprised because I know of his struggles as a boy with polio, on the streets of New York City, surviving on his own. Was that not depressing? Now I’m wondering why I called Gianni on this matter. Then, I remind myself that the point is to get different points of view. “That’s good. I want to hear all perspectives,” I assured him.
Make Lemonade Out Of Lemons
“No, never. I had such a weird childhood that I just appreciate every minute of life. You know, I make lemonade out of lemons. I don’t look at anything negative, I look at there’s a reason for it. But I believe in God, so that’s another thing. You have to have faith. I don’t care what you believe in, as long as you believe in something else other than yourself.”
“Do you know anyone who has committed suicide?” I searched.
“No, I don’t know them personally. I know of them. One of my business partners, years ago, his son did. I know a lot of people who’ve committed suicide, but I didn’t really know them. I’ve got an uncle who committed suicide, but I didn’t get to really know him. I don’t get close to a lot of people, and again because of my childhood.” (Aha! I thought.) He continued, “I don’t like disappointment. I don’t have a big circle of friends. Even my family, you know, I’m very hard on my children. They do what they have to do, and do it right. But I’m not one to sympathize. I don’t have that kind of emotion.”
“So you wouldn’t be the type of person that someone would go to anyway, is what you’re saying.”
“I’d advise them to go to a priest or somebody who is not opinionated. I would say to seek professional help. I wouldn’t give my opinion.”
“Well, that’s good advice, to seek a professional. Not everyone is wired emotionally to be a shoulder to lean on.” I’m talking to the man whose first acting job was to play a lead role bad-guy in the most well known mafia movie on the planet. You know what they say about art imitating life.
Real Unreal
I moved on, “One of the things I’m exploring is the pressure of a public image. For many people who suffer from depression, often the people around them don’t know about it. As I look into this, it seems that’s quite a common thing—they have a public life, an image for the world, then there is the truth of their private life. In Hollywood, and the entertainment business in general, image is so important. What are your thoughts on that?”
“First of all, with some people what they think is their image comes too fast and they think they are bigger than they are. Then they realize the truth, that they are not even a spoke in the wheel, yet. Then that becomes a big disappointment. In this business, often things don’t move along quickly, and that can trigger disappointment for somebody who thinks it should happen now.”
“In general, for many people who have different stress in their life including depression, do you think that there is such an importance put on image that they’re not really able to open up and get help?” I ask.
“I think you gotta be honest with yourself first. Understand who you are. If you’re projecting a false image to begin with, you’re already behind the eight ball. You gotta know who you are, not who you think you are. And look in the mirror and be honest with yourself first. You know, I’ve been very successful, and I don’t feel like I’m a success in this business. Yet, a lot of people would like to have forty-six movies behind them that won nine Oscars. But I don’t take it serious. I think that’s where people get caught up in it. And they get caught up in the people that they surround themselves with. Because they give them such bullshit, and they start to believe it.”
Knowing Who You Are
“Yes, the importance of image in terms of being honest with yourself.” I pushed my notes off to the side of my desk. With Gianni, it needed to flow out organically. I love his candor.
“People build this false image and try to live up to that. That’s hard. Getting up everyday and not really knowing who you are, that’s really hard. I think, just honesty to yourself is what it’s got to be. I’m probably the worst person to ask these questions because I’m not depressed. I’m very happy. I’m seventy-two years old, I have nothing to regret in my life. Even my handicaps and everything else—I capitalized on them. I didn’t use them as a crutch or falsity or for sympathy or anything else.”
“Actually you’re a very good person to ask because there is not one answer or a right answer. It’s about opening a conversation.”
“If everyone was just honest with themselves—I don’t care what walk of life—it would be a better world. It’s misleading. Especially in our business you know. The world will give you nothing.”
Hollywood A-Listers And Image
“Speaking of our business, you’ve known a lot of movie stars…”
“I still do, and most of them are nuts.” We both laugh.
“What do you say about image in Hollywood and a need to be perfect?”
Bobby De Niro or Pacino—they don’t want to be perfect.
“Well, I don’t find that. Let’s use some examples of the people I know, like Bobby De Niro or Pacino—they don’t want to be perfect. That’s why they don’t shave, sometimes they don’t even clean. Look at Mickey Rourke. Look at that maniac. You gotta love him. You think he wants to be perfect? There are so many different examples in the industry. My idols were the old stars, who were perfect, who dressed everyday, who were well groomed, educated, took dance lessons, singing lessons. When the studio system—back then—made you a star.”
“Give me some examples.”
“I mean—even though they were very complex—like Rock Hudson. Look at Marlon Brando when he was younger, the guy was gorgeous. I mean Fred Astaire, Clark Gable, Humphrey Bogart. These people were backed by studios, groomed by people who were professionals to create a star. They built images. Rock Hudson was gay, but they made him have a romance with Doris Day just to show that he’s ‘normal’.”
“So, on one hand the original movie star was created, their image was created—even a fabrication in some aspects. Yet on the other hand, they worked hard and trained hard to become stars, and earned that role.”
“It’s not the society that we’re living in today. You get these new stars today—my gardener dresses better than some of these people. Even females.”
“And yet, many stars today are extremely talented and skilled. Just not always looking like a ‘movie star’, correct? Many have a casual or average-person look—maybe that, too, is by design, an image.” It’s an interesting idea, I thought.
They were who they were, against society basically.
“I remember when Cameron Diaz walked on the set of Any Given Sunday—she didn’t even bother to shower. Even Diane Keaton when she showed up for The Godfather. They were who they were, against society basically. They didn’t need to be perfect.”
Star Power And Longevity
“As role models for the average person, what do you think is the better way to be?”
“First of all, there are stars, and then there are not. I think these young kids today, with all this social media, it’s a falsity. Look at Justin Bieber, who is this kid really? And our young children are following him. He’s a ‘star’ or what? He’s a punk. I think it’s more confusing today than ever. And that’s why so many people are disappointed. Because they want to be that star, but there is the exploitation of their lifestyle and the money they’re making—not everybody can do that. And that’s why there’s no longevity in that way.”
“As oppose to?”
“Look at Mickey Rooney, the guy had a career until he was ninety-three. What new ‘star’ do you see this happening to? Very few.”
“Yes, very few.”
“I remember when I met Robert Downey Jr., it was one of his first parts in a movie called Chances Are. And he had a bad upbringing, you know, his father had him smoking pot when he was a child. And now he’s made the transition, look what he’s done with his life. It took him thirty years.”
“I think he has such an great story and is an amazing example. He turned his life around.”
“But he turned it around after he had the money and the comfort, and after he had made it. What if he didn’t make it? He could have been suicidal. It’s all around us. In the business especially, because there’s so much disappointment. They set themselves up for it. Hey, I’ve lost so many parts in movies, but I don’t get disappointed. Do I for a second? Yeah, like anybody. You’re trying out for something, then you don’t get it. But if you’re a solid individual and know who you are—I always tell people if you want to become an actor make sure you have enough money because you’re not going to make money in it. You have to have seven years of fuel to go to Hollywood. Don’t get off a bus with two-hundred dollars in your pocket and think you’re going to become a star, especially today. It’ll never happen.”
Do What You Can, And Go Do It
“That’s good advice. When you desire or require overnight success in anything in life, this creates disappointment. What I hear you saying is that you must earn your life to live in it comfortably. You hit on something that I think is key, about being a solid individual. So what is your secret sauce, if you will—how is it that you’re so grounded in your own self-worth where others are not? You mentioned your faith in God. Is it just that, or is it your family upbringing, or the support of your family?” I really want to know his secret.
“My family never supported me. I was in the hospital when I was seven. I came out when I was twelve and I hit the road. You know what it is? I know who I am.”
“How?” I stressed the word like I’m squeezing a lemon. We’re getting to something here.
“People think I can do a lot, but half the things I can’t even do. I can’t spell, I can’t read well, but I don’t bring it to your attention. You take what you do have, like talents, and use them. Nobody’s going to take you by the hand and lead you to where you should be. Because they don’t know where you want to be, first of all. Some people have millions and they’re not happy. They don’t know where to go or what to do. The bottom line is, be honest with yourself. Just do what you can do, and go do it.”
Many thanks to actor Gianni Russo for a memorable and thought-provoking interview.