If you’ve ever watched a celebrity awards show I’m sure you’ve seen it happen; the winner clutches her hefty new prize and, with tears in her eyes, leans into the microphone and proclaims, “I’m so humbled to be receiving this award!”
Aaaaand, she lost me.
How can anyone be humbled by such a great honour? The actress receiving the award might actually be a humble person, but that’s in spite of the award and certainly not because of it. To be humble means to be lowly in some way, whether by importance, rank, opinion, status, or other measure. If you have a humble view of yourself it isn’t developed on a stage while being honoured above your competition in front of millions of people.
So why do people keep using the word “humbled” in this way? Are they merely confusing the meaning of “honoured” with “humbled?” Or is it done deliberately? After all, celebrities need to concern themselves with public opinion and that includes being aware that their win means other beloved celebrities lost. Claiming to be “humble” might simply be a nod to the talent of their competitors. A way of saying “I don’t deserve this” whatever their true feelings may be.
Or it could be a way of acknowledging the people who voted for this particular celebrity to win the award. A way of saying, “I know I wouldn’t be here without you.” They say it as a way of thanking their fans for elevating to them to the position they now find themselves in; on a grand stage with a prestigious award in hand while their competition looks on with jealous eyes.
Whatever the reason, people who say they are humbled by great honour are either lying or mistaken because calling yourself “humble” is the least humble thing you can do.
I’ve had a longtime battle with pride but over the years I’ve claimed more victories than losses. Yet I still have times when I’ve said or done something and thought afterwards, “Wow, I really handled that well, I am so humble! Look how great I am at being humble! There is no pride in me at all! Lots of other people are prideful but I’m definitely not.”
You do realize the problem with those thoughts? As soon as I start thinking about how humble I am, I have ceased being humble.
Experiences that are humbling, like many things, are easy to identify in retrospect. You were humbled when you realized all your close friends from college have great jobs and you’re still trying to figure out what you want to do with your life. Also, the time a friend stopped by when your house was super messy (as usual) and you know her house always looks great. There was last year when you had no way to pay for something you really needed and were forced to borrow money from a family member. And, of course, that one time you were nominated for an award and, even though you deserved it the most, someone else won.
Each of these experiences feel pretty awful at the time but can lead to better things if you’re truly willing to let yourself be humbled by them. That means not staying angry or living with a sense of injustice about the situation. Maybe you do deserve better but dwelling on that fact isn’t going to help anyone, least of all you. Instead, these times in your life can serve as reminders that you’re not defined by your job, your house, or any other superficial measurement. Being humble is having an attitude of recognition about your true worth as a human being and that means you’re no better or more deserving of good things than anyone else.
It’s important to note that people with low self-esteem can’t be considered humble either. Just like those with over-inflated egos, these people have a mistaken idea of their own worth. You’re no less valuable than anyone else just because things didn’t work out the way you wanted them to.
So, take the experiences you’ve had in your life where you’ve struggled and let yourself be humbled by them because then you’ll be better equipped to serve others. You’ll learn invaluable lessons you can then put to use to benefit the people you care about most. Often in life a humbling experience occurs right before an opportunity for important work comes along. Extending the value you place on your own life outward to the lives of others is the only way to truly live humbly.
Just don’t tell people you’re humble once you get there.