How many times do we wish for things in our lives to be different?
To be able to manifest that awesome new car or that job that makes so much more money or those gorgeous Jimmy Choo’s that you saw winking at you, or that amazingly perfect mate. Human nature is to strive, this is true, but in today’s day and age we often get too distracted by the shiny things on the way to the truth― the truth that could unlock the key to our gilded cage.
Case in point, me. Not a pretty story. I admit there was a time where my entire focus was on the external. To those that didn’t know me well, but could witness my life in motion, it appeared I had a fabulous life! At the time I worked as an executive for a swanky Hollywood startup, rubbing elbows on a daily basis with celebs. Whenever I traveled, I was put up in five star hotels, had car service or limousines at my beck and call. And of course, I made sure I was always looking fabulous, decked out in all the best designer duds and shoes. I had a beachfront apartment to greet me those times when I was home and a pretty fabulous car too. Did I see my friends much during that time? Not really. Did I have a loving relationship with an amazing man? No, I didn’t. My relationship at the time was in the toilet and he wasn’t all that nice, TBH. Did I sleep well at night? No. My schedule was crazy and sleep was a luxury that I often skipped out on. Did I feel happy and laugh a lot? Nope.
I was an avid shopper and avid spender at the time. Whenever I had a free moment, that’s what I would do. Every time I would get something on my “wish list,” I’d set the bar higher and figure out something bigger, better, shinier to acquire. When all was said and done, my acquisition-fest left me saddled with debt and feeling emptier than ever. At work, I pushed myself harder in order to compensate for my overactive spending, leading eventually to my burnout. It was a vicious cycle and I was severely out of alignment with my inner truth. I was severely out of alignment with Spirit. And it all came crashing down.
When you turn on your TV or take a gander at your Facebook feed, you are constantly getting prodded to buy something or to live a more fabulous life, implying the life you currently have just doesn’t cut it. It’s very easy to get sucked into the competitive plane where we start looking at all the things we don’t have and feeling bad about ourselves. Or maybe we end up going out and buying something we can’t afford just to keep up. This perpetuates a cycle of lack that can spread rampantly throughout your life. Before you know it, you’re focused on all the things you don’t have and you wonder why, no matter what you do, these things will not come to you. In one fell swoop, you’ve knocked yourself out of alignment and with continued thoughts of lack, worry, or doubt you can dig yourself an even bigger ditch than before.
I lived this slippery slope for far too many years. It was only when I decided to start to cultivate love for myself and appreciate the goodness that the Divine had blessed me with that things started to change. However, they didn’t exactly change how I had anticipated. It was a process. I had to find my own alignment and at first. It felt like traveling to a foreign land where you don’t know the language everyone is speaking. You take it one word, one sentence at a time. Our energy is the same way. We’re all made up of energy and so is this lovely Universe we’re playing in. When you are seeking to raise your vibe in hopes of getting back into alignment, it takes a series of steps. The energy has to go through its own type of evolution as it yearns to get back into alignment.
As with most things worth their weight in gold, it can’t be rushed. It unfolds as it’s meant to. For a former control freak like me, that was a hard one to swallow. I came to alignment because of the pain I was feeling in my life. Seeing the rubble surrounding me, the only option I had was to rebuild. Yet, I wasn’t quite sure how. Going back to my old ways, I knew, would not serve me. That would be a recipe for disaster. But venturing out into new places, new experiences and new ways of being, felt a little scary to me, so I had to take lots of baby steps. This looked like dipping my toes in the pool countless times before diving into that water and taking a full leap of faith. I decided to try on a more simple life – one less cluttered with things and instead filled with goodness that can only come from things money can’t buy – like love, like a gorgeous sunset on a balmy summer night, like the laughter of a baby, like the warm hug from a loved one.
How do you get there? Here are two powerful ways to open the door and start the process:
Identify where you are. Clarity is so powerful here. This is not a time to go into judgment or indulge in a pity party. This is a time to lovingly sit with you and acknowledge that yeah, maybe things aren’t quite right and to be ok with where you are. Maybe you made some mistakes? Brilliant! God knows, I certainly have! Maybe something just doesn’t feel right anymore and changes need to be made. The most important point is that you do the inventory. Get clear.
Once you identify where you are, it’s time for some pretty radical self-love. Chances are, if you’re feeling off or out of flow or out of sync with your life, you’ve looked to the external to fill yourself up. It’s time to turn the focus internally and love up on you. Imagine how you would want someone to love up on you or those you have in your life that always know how to cherish you and do that for yourself.
The most important part of the process:
Be patient with your unfoldment. Doing steps one and two will most likely bring up some unsavory moments. Remember – do not judge. As much as we all like to win, we’ve all failed at something at sometime. I have made a plethora of mistakes and I know I’ll make more. And now, I celebrate my failures because of the intel I get with them. Yes – I celebrate my failures! They teach me so much and because I view them this way, I’m able to dig in and mine the gold within them. I can extract where something spun out and understand how I got there so I can avoid it again. You can to. Please don’t be afraid to fail. Failure doesn’t have to mean the end of something. Actually, I see failure as the beginning, the beginning of a new possibility and that’s quite exciting!
When we approach life from this space, we can’t help but align with the Divine. We get into Spiritual abundance, Spiritual overflow, we connect. We connect in a way that’s eye opening, in a way that brings insights, in a way that moves us forward, and the beauty of it all, is that this comes full circle and brings us back to material prosperity too. When we are Spiritually connected, in line with the Divine, money, opportunities, the right people, and more come to us effortlessly, magnetically, powerfully. It’s our job to receive, to allow and to realize we don’t have to kill ourselves to have the life we want, we can get into alignment, connect with our Spirit, love up on ourselves and things will fall into place. It’s the ultimate win-win.
Jessica Nevins is a Transformation Coach, Motivational Speaker and Author passionate about manifestation, energetic alignment and Spiritual gifting that uses over a decade of energy healing, coaching, teaching and training paired with her Spiritual gifts and spiritual teachings to illuminate the path to manifestation, true abundance and Spiritual fulfillment for her clients. She hosts The Divine It Girl Podcast on iTunes and is the co-founder of the Spiritually Sassy Global Light Community. www.jessicanevins.com