God did not intend Frenchmen to jog or diet. But that's just what France's irksomely hyperkinetic president, Nicholas Sarkozy, was doing in this weekend's summer heat. The Gallic Energizer Bunny collapsed and was carted off to hospital. Many French knowingly nodded their heads and said, "Voila! You see?!"
By contrast, God certainly intended for Italians to make amore. That brings us to Italy's bad boy prime minister, 72-year-old Silvio Berlusconi, who was likely partying while his 54-year old French counterpart was being hauled off by ambulance.
The New York Times just prudishly denounced the fun-loving Berlusconi, as "an aging Lothario." The same newspaper that applauded President George Bush's trumped-up war against Iraq that left up to one million dead and four million refugees.
So what is Berlusconi's sin? Cavorting and gallivanting with numerous comely young women, and having one hell of a good time. Just the kind of behavior that infuriates many women, but leaves men filled with envy and admiration.
Italy's left wing media is in a frenzy over Berlusconi's nocturnal escapades with a string of gorgeous young ladies. Unable to defeat him at the polls or prosecute him in court, the left has declared jihad on Berlusconi's sex life.
In best Italian style, Berlusconi shrugs, "I am not a saint."
Certainly not, but he has been Italy's best prime minister in memory.
A former cruise ship singer turned entrepreneur, Berlusconi owns a big chunk of Italy's business and media. He's been accused of all sorts of financial misdoings, but so far has defeated every attempt by leftwing Italian prosecuting magistrates to convict him. Still, a nasty odor hangs over his administration. But then again, all politics and much of business in Italy reek with corruption. One cannot conduct either business or politics in Italy without becoming soiled.
The latest uproar came after Berlusconi spent a night of rapture with a beautiful woman. Unbeknown to him, she was a high-priced prostitute, paid by a favor-seeking businessman in a classic "honey-trap" so beloved of intelligence agencies. Or, the tryst may have been arranged by Berlusconi's political enemies.
This Jezebel made secret tapes of their night together that she sold and are now all over Italy's slavering media. We learn that the 72-year-old prime minister remains robust in bed, a hater of condoms and a considerate lover.
Italy's left wing opposition thundered in righteous indignation that Berlusconi had "weakened the image and authority of the Italian government!"
What a joke. Every Italian over three knows the do-nothing parliament in Rome is filled with crooks and buffoons who are held by all Italians in profound contempt and scorn. A favorite Rome water-hole of Italy's smelly politicians is aptly named, "Due Ladrone," or two thieves.
Berlusconi in bed is still a better prime minister than the political dwarfs of Italy's left wing opposition and the neo-fascist crackpots and racists of the far right.
Worldly Italians have so far laughed off Berlusconi's antics. Italians accept sexual differences between men and women and men's natural urges to roam with, "boys will be boys." This attitude, of course, enrages North American women, who insist men and women are the same when it comes to sex.
A lady friend of mine says she wants to be reincarnated as a male Italian. Many Italian men live at home with their mothers until their thirties where they are spoiled, lovingly pampered, and treated like overgrown children.
Italian soldiers regularly receive care packages of goodies from home and send their laundry every weekend to mama. Italians may not be great at war, but they do teach us to enjoy life, and they make the world a happier place.
Berlusconi's approval rating dipped slightly from 50 percent to 48 percent, probably because some women felt sorry for his understandably embarrassed wife, who sued for divorce after Berlusconi was seen being overly attentive to an 18-year-old beauty straight out of a Boticelli painting, and bought the young nymph a $6,000 dollar piece of jewelry for her birthday.
Berlusconi even reportedly slipped away from the boredom of the recent G-8 summit in the Italian city of L'Aquila he was hosting to return to Rome and party with some very attractive young ladies.
I'm sure 99.5 percent of straight Italian men would give their last rigatoni to be in Berlusconi's place. They are happy to have a prime minister who sings very well and makes Italian men proud. Even the Vatican made only gentle tut-tuts to Bad Boy Berlusconi's bacchanals.
Let the Americans have their warlike commanders-in-chief and phony "family values." Let the British have their unctuous prime ministers, Russia its scowling Vlad Putin, and Germany its glum, dumpy lady leader.
Italy has a lover-in-chief.
Berlusconi is Italy's richest man and most successful modern leader. What else is left for him to do? Start wars? Invade France? Get another hair transplant? Become secretary general of the UN? He has had prostate cancer and, from what we hear on the sex tapes, has overcome the disease with gusto. Let him enjoy a good time in his twilight years.
But fun aside, Berlusconi may have gone too far even for Italians. Once men hit 60, the most sensitive organ in their body becomes their ego. Berlusconi is being rather reckless in a country where discretion is still favored. He risks tripping over his own public indiscretions and taken for an old fool. Dabbling with an 18-year-old is dangerous, even for him. Easy-going Italians may eventually say, "Basta, Silvio!"
But hold all the hypocrisy from left wing critics and dried up prudes about Berlusconi's zesty love life. Relations with the opposite sex are no measure of a politician's worth.
So bravo, Silvio, for livening up our summer and providing some brief but welcome diversion from bombs, bullets and bankruptcy.