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"We Don't Divorce Little Girls," Said the Judge. "But How Come You Allow Little Girls to Get Married?" Said the Little Girl.

Posted: 01/01/12 11:19 AM ET

Nujood Ali made world headlines in 2008 when she was granted a divorce in Yemen at the age of 10. She had been married a year to a man who beat and raped her. So she decided to go to a courthouse and speak to a judge. Her case prompted other children to protest forced marriage.

Yemen is certainly not alone in allowing children under 18 to marry without their consent. According to UNICEF, the U.N. Children's Fund, several countries in sub-Sahara Africa and in South Asia, including India, have high rates in girls marrying before the age of 18.

But Yemen is one of the few countries in the Middle East without laws restricting child marriage and women, despite the turmoil in the country, have fought this practice. One of them is Tawakkol Karman, a co-recipient of the 2011 Nobel Peace Prize. She is a journalist, a women's rights activist -- and associated with the Muslim Brotherhood.

Slavery and Rape
Human Rights Watch, in a 54-page report, urges Yemen to set a minimum marriage age of 18, particularly now that the country may emerge from turmoil and has a power-sharing government. The upheavals have left little time for a discussion of marriage and abuse, tantamount to slavery and rape.

A 2006 field study revealed that child marriage among Yemeni girls under 18 reached 52.1%, compared to 6.7% among males. A shocking 14 percent of the girls were married before the age of 15, particularly in poor rural areas, HRW said.

The Yemeni Supreme Council for Women's Affairs attempted to introduce a bill to setting an age for marriage at 18, and then lowered it to 17. But the Sharia legislative committee in parliament rejected such a proposal every year, saying it was un-Islamic to set a minimum age for marriage and prevented it from being debated.

Child marriage, which usually results in immediate pregnancy, stunts the growth of girls, few of them ever returning to school. The U.N. Population Fund (UNFPA) says they are five times more likely to die in pregnancy or childbirth than women aged 20 to 24, adding that the "vast majority of deaths take place within marriage." (Boys are seldom forced into marriage).

Most adolescents become pregnant before their bodies are mature enough to safely deliver a child. When they die, the result is often orphan children who roam the streets.

Reem: beaten and raped into marriage
Reem, aged 14 from Sanaa, the Yemeni capital, was 11 when her father married her to a cousin, 21 years her senior, Human Rights Watch reported. Against Reem's will, a quick religious marriage ensued. Three days after she was married, her husband raped her. Reem attempted suicide by cutting her wrists with a razor. Her husband took her back to her father in Sanaa, and Reem then ran away to her mother (her parents are divorced). Reem's mother escorted her to court in an attempt to get a divorce.

The judge told her, "We don't divorce little girls." Reem replied, "But how come you allow little girls to get married?

So will it ever change? Barbara Crossette, a former New York Times correspondent, was hired as a researcher for UNFPA. In traveling to various nations she said men and boys have to be part of the solution, particularly in areas where there is little recourse to law. Community organizers from the same nationality have do the explaining about family planning. "We have to get away from macro thinking," she said.

Asked about child brides, Jamal Benomar, the U.N. representative for Yemen, said the good news was that the country had "a very lively civil society, including very active women's groups" who had been able to organize over the last few months.

The bad news, said Benomar, (who has been involved in elections and human rights since he was tortured and jailed in his native Morocco from 1975 to 1983) was that five or six of Yemen's 18 provinces were run by insurgents, government opponents or Al-Qaeda. Few rights for women in these areas.

The statistics for maternal mortality have improved by 34 percent. That means a woman is no longer dying every minute, but one woman is still dying every minute and a half. No doubt one-stop shopping for prenatal care, malnutrition, access to a hospital and skilled practitioners and professionals could prevent many deaths. As could education for girls.

But the squeamishness of talking about family planning or contraception -- in short sex -- is a no-no in many nations. An estimated 215 million women in the developing world want to delay or avoid pregnancy but have no access to contraception or fear the side effects or their families object, says UNFPA.

But funds for family planning whether private groups or U.N. agencies, have receded in recent years even for those women who want access. Abstinence as a policy rather than a goal is a joke when sex is forced.

 

Follow Evelyn Leopold on Twitter: www.twitter.com/evjournalist

Nujood Ali made world headlines in 2008 when she was granted a divorce in Yemen at the age of 10. She had been married a year to a man who beat and raped her. So she decided to go to a courthouse and ...
Nujood Ali made world headlines in 2008 when she was granted a divorce in Yemen at the age of 10. She had been married a year to a man who beat and raped her. So she decided to go to a courthouse and ...
 
 
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06:34 PM on 01/07/2012
The PC buddy says,
ain't it cool with such cultures.... specially round your neighborhood.
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06:15 PM on 01/06/2012
and i thought they were all like the ones on all American muslim
06:31 PM on 01/07/2012
The PC buddy will tell you that the guys on the show in the US got religion right but the ones in the ME (cradle of religion) and the east misunderstood it.
10:13 PM on 01/08/2012
Are you aware that this practice also goes on among non-Muslims in the US? Haven't you heard of the FLDS groups in Arizona, Utah, and Texas? Girls as young as 12 can be and are married off in them.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
BigWillyG
11:29 AM on 01/06/2012
Am I the only one kinda disgusted by the comments on here defending this abuse and court incompetence with arguments like "well 200 years ago it happened here", "well polygamist mormon cults do it" or "states have age of consent laws below 18?"
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Jose Perez Hernandez
11:07 PM on 01/05/2012
The people of Yemen believe in curses, witchcraft, and jealousy as a weapon. Men do what they want at every class level. . Women compete with other women and learn to survive men. They are marginalized and uneducated, with only few ways to earn status in a family. Failure to give birth and to regulate a household can be fatal.
08:38 PM on 01/09/2012
That sounds like Mexico to me
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robertstone1robert
My micro bio is too big.
10:48 PM on 01/05/2012
What does it take for these maniacs in today's age to learn that marriage is a sacred bond between two people? How can you expect a child to fully grasp this concept?
03:10 AM on 03/02/2012
Because in their culture, it's not.
03:57 PM on 01/05/2012
Why did this article end with contraceptives are the answer? Surely the focus should remain on changing the society and the law on under 18 year olds getting married. Not on poisoning young girls with contraceptive drugs after the forced marriage. Which note, considering a man of more than 20 years their senior would marry a young girl, beat her, I highly doubt she would be allowed to take whatever drugs she wishes!
09:17 AM on 01/06/2012
Because it will be far harder to change the societies and laws. In the meantime, there are immediate issues that need to be addressed. When a society has such deeply held beliefs it isn't easy to change them overnight.
12:05 PM on 01/06/2012
I agree... But this society is also a society that does not allow contraceptives. And giving them in order to 'help' these girls will only put them at a greater risk.
01:20 PM on 01/06/2012
The example you point out is only one example of how the movement typified by this article is somewhat confused.

Of course you are right. Contraceptives are not the answer, even proposing such a ridiculous answer will only infuriate people over there, stiffening their resolve to resist the reform that really IS needed.
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Jame Gumb
It rubs the lotion on its skin
02:44 PM on 01/05/2012
""Abstinence as a policy rather than a goal is a joke when sex is forced.""

I think this comment reflects the error of Western judgment. We have the benefit of a social security system. In most of these countries, dowries are the custom, brides are bought and sold everyday. It's archaic, but it is still a means of social support that's as old as human history. These poor countries can't be expected to change without another means to support an aging generation with no retirement plan.
08:45 PM on 01/05/2012
That's not true. In the beginning, dowries were given to the brides themselves, not the groom's family. The dowry was to be used to set up the new family - house, furniture, food, etc. That is not the way it is now. In India, a bride's family can be sent to the poor house (figuratively speaking) trying to appease the groom's family. Selling little girls (brides?) is not the tradition of dowry, it is slavery. Just because people are less fortunate than we are does not mean they get a free pass to enslave children.
09:11 PM on 01/05/2012
It's not your business though. If you're white, there's a good chance that your ancestors raped, enslaved and colonized other cultures -- why are you passing judgment on others?
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Jame Gumb
It rubs the lotion on its skin
04:36 AM on 01/06/2012
it certainly is true and India isn't the only country that uses dowries, and it's not always the woman that pays.

also, your definition of slavery has no indistinguishable difference between marriage in most countries.
09:27 PM on 01/05/2012
what part of delusions to do experience? blaming western judgement, legalized rape is that rape. what part of rape don't you understand?
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Jame Gumb
It rubs the lotion on its skin
04:37 AM on 01/06/2012
legalized rape? That's exactly the point isn't it? you are begging the question of it being rape. American norms are irrelevant outside America.
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Anne Marie313
Christian Conservative-
11:35 AM on 01/05/2012
no one should be married before 16 for health reasons, no one should be married until they are 18 because of maturity and so they might have a chance at an education.
01:23 PM on 01/06/2012
I can believe the 16 limit you give, but the 18? Most 18 year olds are not mature enough either. If we wait till they are mature enough, most will have to wait till 40:(
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Anne Marie313
Christian Conservative-
08:07 PM on 01/07/2012
they should wait until they are 18 because it may allow some of these woman to be able to pursue a full education instead of being married off before it can be completed. It is not just about maturity it is so that these young women have a chance to enjoy their youth and receive an education- that which everyone deserves instead of being a 16 year old bride with an incomplete education married to a 55 year old man that beats them. Granted an 18 year old may not be much better sometimes, there is a lot of brain developement that happens between those years. I say let these women have some of their youths before they are sujected to mistreatment by their drunk elderly husbands.
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lambdin1
What's this?
11:27 AM on 01/05/2012
Smart girl!! Dumb country!
04:22 AM on 01/05/2012
My previous comment should have read - "However this problem isn't just restricted to the Middle East, Africa or Asia which alone you seem to have highlighted, perhaps driven by the number of cases emanating from these regions. But truth be told...."
04:18 AM on 01/05/2012
I agree that laws need to be in place... I am from India and we have a minimum age of marriage which is 18 for girls and 21 for boys, but the fact of the matter is that often social norms and customs rule, more so in very traditional societies. However this problem isn't just restricted to the Middle East, Africa or Asia which you seem to have left out, perhaps driven by the number of cases emanating from these regions. But truth be told, even in a so-called developed nation like the USA you have instances of young girls being forced into marriage against their will, often to much older men. You seem to have forgotten Warren Jeffs and countless others like him. I enjoy reading your posts and expect impartial reportage from someone of your stature.
10:17 PM on 01/08/2012
Warren Jeffs isn't the only polygamist leader who is doing this. There are others doing it, too, but they just aren't as well known as he is.
02:20 AM on 01/05/2012
I appreciate the intent of your writing and the work of organizations like Human Rights Watch -- but please understand that your work is used as war propaganda by the military-industrial complex. We don't need to interfere in the affairs of other nations -- interference starts with columns like these and ends in war and occupation.
bklynsparrow
creating reality from unreal things
10:36 AM on 01/05/2012
So we should turn our backs on abused children and women? It's groups like these that create change by speaking out. Most of them work at the grass roots level. If the military-Industrial complex uses it as war propaganda, there's nothing we can do about that. But understand, the M-I complex will find any reason if they really want to go to war. When Bush tried to tell he we were going into Iraq to spread democracy, no one believed him. To stop humanitarian work over worries about it becoming war propaganda hurts the wrong people and stops nothing.
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Galician
Keep calm and carry on
11:45 AM on 01/05/2012
I couldn't agree more! and all of us should stop being cynical and say loud and clear and name all those countries when children and women are considered as second or third class citizens. The purpose of saying it is to denounce them publicly and if US government or any other take this as an opportunity to use it in its favour, blame and denounce them too for that!.
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olitenup
11:58 AM on 01/05/2012
What an evil thing to say.
10:50 PM on 01/04/2012
I don't understand why this is called "marriage". It is not marriage in any sense it should be called slavery or legalized child abuse.
02:23 AM on 01/05/2012
Regardless of what it is -- do not interfere. Don't even read articles about it.
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04:25 PM on 01/05/2012
Weird view, but hey, we're all allowed to have one. Totally don't agree. I hate the patriarchy in this country and all across the planet. I will make their lives miserable until the day I die. I will read. And write. And vote. No one will ever take my rights away, and I don't believe in the toxic male order.
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ladywing
I get on my knees & pray We don't get fooled again
05:06 PM on 01/05/2012
Don't read? Are you serious? And you a libertarian to say such a thing.
I must assume you then did not read the article so as not to taint your mind?
How about don't think,don't act, don't speak?
What Liberties would you allow LU?
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04:21 PM on 01/05/2012
Truth! Speak it!
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tmm77625
Liberals: denying reality since 1848.
08:05 PM on 01/04/2012
"Abstinence as a policy rather than a goal is a joke when sex is forced.

Follow Evelyn Leopold on Twitter: www.twitter.com/evjournalist "

As much as I agree with the article, that is not the statement of a journalist, but of an editorial.
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rtgmath
There has got to be a better way!
02:47 PM on 01/04/2012
"Abstinence as a policy rather than a goal is a joke when sex is forced."

Completely correct, not only in Yemen and Afghanistan, but also here in the US.

Too many times sex among young people is forced or coerced. Sometimes older people force sex on young people. The rapes and coercions mostly go unreported for a variety of reasons. Abstinence education fails completely under these circumstances.

Children need education on resources and access to birth control and confidential medical help (relatives are often the ones raping the kids!). Children should not be left in the dark about the sex act any more than adults should be. Ignorance is the opportunity abusers take advantage of.

Child marriage in foreign lands is a tragedy and ought to be a crime. But all too often we allow our children to get into tragic circumstances by denying them vital education that could help them.
05:37 PM on 01/04/2012
Well said.
09:24 AM on 01/06/2012
Very true.