Sperm Count: Inaugurating The White House Bed

Can you imagine what it must be like to have made it to President? You've been inaugurated and you're going to spend the first night in The White House. If you're Hillary or some future female president of the United States you're probably thinking about the political correctness of the leader of the free world getting fucked on this important night, or any night for that matter. If you're married to the president you run the chance of being fucked for the first time in The White House by the leader of the free world and that's bound to be one of the great thrills, equivalent say to partaking of a delicacy like Fugu. If say you're Melania Trump you're probably thinking of the teddy you might be wearing to entice The Donald. If you're Bill, you might be asking yourself how the tables will be turned and how the changes in roles is going to affect your love life. Michele and Barack have always seemed to be a loving couple and like with any of the couples you like and admire you can't help thinking about frequency, e.g. how often they get it on. Actually a well balanced couple with a seemingly perfect relationship is a hard act to follow whether they occupy The White House, a house in Chappaqua or Mar-a-Lago but few people realize that along with international and domestic policy, every new couple who enter The White House actually has to live up to the standards set by their predecessor. John and Jackie, for instance, were following in the footsteps of Ike and Mamie, just as Pat and Richard had big shoes to fill when they followed Lyndon and Lady Bird. How hot will it be in the winner's circle after this hotly contested election?

master bedroom of The White House in l963 (Kennedy Library)

{This was originally posted to The Screaming Pope, Francis Levy's blog of rants and reactions to contemporary politics, art and culture}