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Why I Wrote Sex, Mom, and God: How the Bible's Strange Take on Sex Led to Crazy Politics--and How I Learned to Love Women (and Jesus) Anyway

Posted: 05/31/11 06:52 PM ET

The 5,000-plus emails and letters generated by my memoir Crazy for God (about why I left a leadership position in the religious right) made it clear that I still had questions to answer about my family's role in the rise of the American extremism, even violence.

People liked the book but some people knew that I'd ducked some questions, like the fact we were responsible for the murder of several abortion providers. It takes a while to work up the courage to be honest and after I got Crazy for God off my chest I wanted to take another step (and my gloves off) before moving on.

The reason I've written my (just published) new book Sex, Mom, and God: How the Bible's Strange Take on Sex Led to Crazy Politics -- and How I Learned to Love Women (and Jesus) Anyway is because of the insane rightward tilt of the Republicans post-Obama's election has meant that the path taken by the religious right (the movement that most informs the present day Republican Party) was something I felt needed to be better understood and exposed... from the inside.

When I'd be interviewed on NPR or by Rachel Maddow it often seemed to me that the questions asked about the Religious Right showed that even at best there is a lack of understanding of what it is that has pushed America in the direction of a theocracy where people like Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck et al seem to want to turn the US into a "Christian" version of Iran.

In Sex, Mom and God, I use my life as a lens through which to view a larger narrative: the rightward lurch of American politics since the 1970s.

What is happening in America is an expression of mass sexual dysfunction "inspired" by the allegiance of millions of individuals to the Bible. That is all the culture war really is. I wanted to write a book about this but told as a personal story.

In Sex, Mom and God I go back to where I -- and millions of others -- began our journeys: in the grip of our bedtime Bible stories! From a child's perspective peering out at the larger world from deep in the cocoon of a "Bible believing home," every word of the Bible is understood to be true in ways that nothing else is or ever will be even if, years later, that child grows up and changes his or her mind.

To be true to what I hope is the heart of the best of the universal religious message, I want to say that redemption through selflessness, hope, and love necessitates a new and fearless repudiation of the parts of holy books and traditions -- be they Jewish, Christian, Muslim (or other) -- that bring us messages of hate, exclusion, racism, ignorance, misogyny, homophobia, tribalism, and fear. To find any spiritual truth within any religion's holy books, we must mentally edit them by the light God has placed in each of us. As Anne Hutchinson put it at her trial, "The Lord knows that I could not open scripture; he must by his prophetical office open it unto me."

Those who wish to live as Christians, Jews, Muslims, agnostics, or atheists by following the humble thread of what I'll call divine uncertainty, as opposed to those who wish to force others to be like them by using Christianity, Judaism, Islam, or doctrinaire secularism as a weapon, must shift from unquestioning faith in their books, the Bible, Koran, Torah, (or science) to a life-affirming message of transcendence.

The "big issues" really do boil down to sex, mom and God. "Modernity" has changed nothing. We human animals seek out meaning that transcends the sum of our physical parts. That never changes. And we make the same mistakes in every age. What has changed is that the stakes have gotten intolerably high because of our growing capacity to do global harm.

Anyone raised in a home where one or more parent or sibling was driven by a sense of passionate mission, be that of the left, right, religious, political or social will "get" my book. How does one separate one's self from a driven tribe? That's the individual's question. Our larger societal question is: How do we box in, contain and then reverse the evil the American right is doing to our society? For instance, if anyone can look at the way religion has treated and treats women and not be pissed off they have something wrong with them.

I intend on pissing off every misogynist homophobic religious conservative and/or empire-building neoconservative imperialist supporter of our permanent war economy stuck in the ideological straight jacket that I used to so proudly wear.

I'd also like to plant a seed that changes a few minds.

Sex, Mom and God also makes an argument for rediscovering the human values that are what is far more important than politics. Or put it this way; at age 58 I've discovered that nothing beats a tea party with a two year old who loves you unconditionally.

Frank Schaeffer is a writer. His latest book is Sex, Mom, and God: How the Bible's Strange Take on Sex Led to Crazy Politics--and How I Learned to Love Women (and Jesus) Anyway

 
 
 

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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
veganlady
03:39 PM on 06/06/2011
Reading it now, hoping to find some sense of balance with my former fundie ways and the world view I now have. Its very hard to reconcile one thing and another. I still believe that Jesus was the Son of God, but having very serious trouble with my former fundamentalist churchgoing friends and the view they take of politics and society. I cannot join them in this anymore and I struggle every single day with my concept of God as my friends tell me that I'm wrong, I'm deceived and they're always right. I avoid that as much as possible, but the balancing act of what I was in and the way i think now is difficult. Its cerainly a challenge to come to some sort of balance.
08:57 PM on 06/04/2011
I loved the last book and just this moment found out about the new one. Look forward to reading it. I'm a fan
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
03:13 PM on 06/05/2011
Thanks Jillsobule! Let me know what you think of it. Best, F
09:14 PM on 06/02/2011
My background is New Light Presbyterian as per Jonathan Edwards, and with a finishing of Scottish 'Common Sense' theology ala John Witherspoon, which is something that I assume your father was probably been schooled. I find that the modern 'war economy' you referenced is quite the opposite of what the Signers would support.

Please note, I handled the personal copies of Benjamin Rush's 'Essays', Boudinot's 'Age of Revelation', and Wm. Tennant's manuscripts at a Princeton library, just to make sure... .

Declaration Signer Rush:

"In order more deeply to affect the minds of the citizens of the United States with the blessings of peace, by contrasting them with the evils of war, let the following inscriptions be painted upon the sign, which is placed over the door of the War Office.

1. An office for butchering the human species.

2. A Widow and Orphan making office.

3. A broken bone making office.

4. A Wooden leg making office.

5. An office for creating public and private vices.

6. An office for creating a public debt.

7. An office for creating speculators, stock Jobbers, and Bankrupts.

8. An office for creating famine.

9 An office for creating pestilential diseases.

10. An office for creating poverty, and the destruction of liberty, and national happiness.

....Above this group of woeful figures,—let the following words be inserted, in red characters to represent human blood,

"NATIONAL GLORY." pp. 183 ff.

Google books Rush's "Essays, Literary, Moral and Philosophical, 1806.

Any thoughts?
04:56 PM on 06/02/2011
""I intend on pissing off every misogynist homophobic religious conservati­ve and/or empire-bui­lding neoconserv­ative imperialis­t supporter of our permanent war economy stuck in the ideologica­l straight jacket that I used to so proudly wear.""

Ha, beautiful Frank. Just this morning I had a parishoner ask me what I thought of so many church ministries today being filled by and, heavens forbid, even led by women (we have 2 female pre-med students working in unidentified countries in North Africa this summer). The Lord didn't immediately bring a Baptist response to mind so I said, "well, over 25 years of church life, I've concluded that since men don't have the ba*ls/inclination to do or go what/where women don't hesitate to do/go, that's the last thing I'm losing sleep over." I remember when I was in seminary (where I met your Dad not too long before he passed away), one of the widows of the Ecuador/Auca Indian five American martyrs (not Betty Elliott) told me how bemused she was that once they became "celebrities" scores of churches where they had previously not been allowed to even step on the platform b/c they were women couldn't sign them up fast enough to speak on Sunday morning. "Theological" convictions, indeed.

Keep stirring the pot, Frank, I'm looking forward to reading your new treatise!
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
06:54 PM on 06/02/2011
canucklehead2, I'm grateful you read my post. Please do read the book and let me know what you think. best, F
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QDP
radical green architect
02:54 PM on 06/02/2011
It's not that you pushed the US into a theocracy. The problem is mis-information and truly corporate propaganda of the worst kind.
The original intent of our constitution was precisely to prevent the oligarchic plutonomy from having these almost limitless powers. Our system has been usurped by the very legislative controls we sought to limit in our government.

Change comes from education and broad scale INTEREST -none of which we have, and our press is obviously catered to the wishes of corporate America. Our watchdog has become a fat, lazy lapdog. Getting the word OUT, and discussing change with your representatives is the only peaceful way to bring change about.

Then, there is always the Second Amendment...
dowl
Lord have mercy on us all
05:41 AM on 06/02/2011
Thank you Frank Schaeffer for your posts and interviews. I will make a special effort to read both your books which I'm certain I'll gain more insight into the strange christian dominionism bent of 'Old Testament Christians.' It seems amazing that some evangelicals and/or fundamentalists identify so little in their 'doing of theology' that many miss the liberation message of Jesus Christ.

I am appalled that Christianity has been used so cruelly to oppress the children of God.

Lord have mercy on us all.
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
06:55 PM on 06/02/2011
I'm grateful for your kindness,dowl, Best, Frank
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kornbluthwasright
Proud pro-Labor Thuggette
12:51 AM on 06/02/2011
Mr. Schaeffer,

Considering how much I enjoyed your previous book, Crazy for God, and how insightful I find your blogs here on HP, I am enthusiastically looking forward to reading Sex, Mom, and God.

I would like to state that I am basically Jewish, with a strong streak of what I call Smorgasbordianism (which, as the name suggests, means I sample a little bit here, a little bit there, from other religious/cultural traditions). I mention this only because I think it should be known--or better known--that your readership is by no means limited to Christians or former Christians.

Thank you for sharing with us your thoughtful, inspiring, and often poignant writings.
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
06:56 PM on 06/02/2011
Hi kornbluthwasright, and thanks for the note. I'm always heartened to learn that my readership includes more than people like me, or should I say who escaped the world I ran from. Best, Frank
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kornbluthwasright
Proud pro-Labor Thuggette
01:21 AM on 06/03/2011
Thank you for taking the time from your busy schedule to respond--when I told my husband (who happens to be both a very open-minded Christian and a hardworking biochemist) that Frank Schaeffer had replied to a comment of mine, he was quite impressed; he's a big fan of yours. :-)
04:21 PM on 06/01/2011
I was a PK also but my father's philosophy for his family was that the church was his chosen professional and not his children's. I felt lucky during my childhood not to be forced to "lead by example" though I am sure his children made his professional life difficult at times. I feel lucky today to have a rich spiritual life based on how he lived his religion. He preached and lived, that tolerance,kindness,charity and inclusion are the foundation of any religion. I watched him fight his entire life against the tendencies of his congregation to use the bible as justification for sexism,segregation, exclusion and self rightousness predjudice.I feel strongly that we are waging the same war today against the "religious right". I only hope that I can be as stalwart today in my conviction that this is not the way this country should go as my father was in his day. I want to thank you for writing both of these books and helping to clarify just how we've been lead so far off track.
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
06:57 PM on 06/02/2011
Hi Mrs Main Street, thanks for the note, and from one PK to another, glad you are reading my work! Best, to you, F
04:19 PM on 06/01/2011
Thanks, Frank, for your openness and honesty. Your book is a fascinating (and IMHO correct) "reading" of Holy Scripture and the way that humans twist it to our own particular purposes. I personally identify with much of what the book is about and how shame about sex and our bodies (through Biblical BS!) poisons our concept of self and others. Please keep writing about this topic, it reaffirms what I intuitively "know" to be true....
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
06:58 PM on 06/02/2011
Hi Russell Adams, thanks for the note, and you and i are on the same page, Best, F
01:47 PM on 06/01/2011
Frank, this book is quite simply the best blend of humor and astute and honest religious commentary I've ever read. Your sections on the snow woman and your conversations with your penis had me howling with laughter. At the same time, your stance on the abortion issue and your insights regarding the way Christianity is twisted by Reconstructionists and right wing politicos hits every nail right on the head.

My mom caught me stuffing splooge-stained sheets into the washing machine at the age of 13 and told me, "Awww! That's God's special way of taking care of you until you're married!" Through years of hard personal work and self-development, I have healed from such bizarre messages. Your book let me know that I was not the only one! Thank you for sharing your journey in such a vulnerable and authentic way.
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
06:53 PM on 06/02/2011
Hi JCS, thanks so very much!!! F
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01:38 PM on 06/01/2011
At first, I thought that I did'nt grow up in a family "driven by a mission," like you did.

Then I realized that I grew up in a family driven by craziness, high, conflicting expectations and enough denial to isolate my brothers and myself from the world around us. The three of us have been wrestling with the world and with the ghosts of those old expectations ever since.

So I really *do* have a lot in common with you. I'm sure it will be an interesting book to read this Summer.

tt77
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
02:49 PM on 06/01/2011
Hi Traveller77: Thanks for reading my post, and what you say ties in to email I get saying how very different, yet the same so many people's households were to mine in just the way you mention. If you read the book please do tell me what you think of it. Best, Frank
12:07 PM on 06/01/2011
""I intend on pissing off every misogynist homophobic religious conservative and/or empire-building neoconservative imperialist supporter of our permanent war economy stuck in the ideological straight jacket that I used to so proudly wear.""

I just adore you for this. xoxox
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
12:38 PM on 06/01/2011
Hi Violettefemme: Thanks! Very Best, Frank
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kbella
11:25 AM on 06/01/2011
Mr. Schaeffer, I am looking forward to reading your new book. I read Crazy for God last year, and I absolutely loved it. While I was not raised in a household anywhere near the extreme of yours, I did grow up in Catholic household that gave me a lot of guilt and left me with some serious issues. Like you, I grew up believing in all of the right wing talking points and was to a certain extent brainwashed to not think for myself in regards to politics or religion. At the tender age of 11 I was recruited to go fight abortion and attend the Pro-Life march. I, luckily, broke out of the "straightjacket" as you refer to it.

I am sincerely looking forward to reading your new book, and I thank you for sharing your life with us so that we can better understand how exactly the political situation in this country has become what it is.
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
12:39 PM on 06/01/2011
Hi Kbella: I'm grateful you'll read my latest and please let me know what you think of it. Best, Frank
08:57 PM on 05/31/2011
I am in the middle of the book, and am not disappointed. Your tenderness, Mr. Schaeffer, redeems your (justified) fury. And you make me laugh as hard as David Sedaris does, which is saying a lot. It's wonderful to read a book by someone who's in on the secret that loving a child IS the whole meaning of life, and the reason we (or I anyway) exist at all. That's my religion.

I am working to re-elect the President. I do it because of what he stands for, which is so much bigger than any one man can be. But the compromises he has made (probably because of pragmatism) and the daily stories that twist my gut into knots are almost too much. And I don't even watch TV! I am almost (almost) ready to give up involvement in politics- as much as I love my President- and just parent and paint.

One of the things I'm getting from your work is the possibility of transformation, and the realization that fulfilling one's purpose takes a lifetime. And that art and stories are important. They may be all that saves us in the end.
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Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
11:16 PM on 05/31/2011
Hi KHahn: thank you. Your kind note mean a lot to me. Best, Frank
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Hazumu
08:04 PM on 05/31/2011
I've wondered for a long time why fundamentalists have a fecundity fetish on one hand and a fear and disgust for 'non-normative' expressions of sexuality on the other. This one article has just crystallized a lot of disparate data points into a huge A-ha! moment.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Frank Schaeffer
Frank Schaeffer is a New
11:16 PM on 05/31/2011
Hi Hazumu: Thanks for reading my blog, and the "A-ha!" moment. Best, Frank
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Sister Bluebird
11:49 AM on 06/01/2011
Its all about control. Fecundity is good if you control the source. Anything else is not-controlled, dangerous, outside the realm of polite society--single moms, and girls who don't say no. They are dangerous and must be controlled and barring that, they must be punished.