The Online Application Tango

My recollection from many years ago is that it used to be relatively easy applying for a job listing. You dusted off and tweaked the resume, scratched out a new cover letter, printed them both on the "special" letterhead, folded the papers neatly into an envelope, licked a stamp, popped it in the mailbox -- and, voila, you'd get a call back in a month or so (or not).

Maybe in those days it was your personal choice of elegant paper that would catch the eye of the HR director or hiring manager: "Ooh, such nice taste in ivory Southmark paper he has, the kind that Abraham Lincoln had used. And the texture -- it's rich, it has depth... It's like holy parchment! We must hire him immediately!"

Times have changed just a wee bit in 20 plus years. Not only don't you need the fancy paper -- unless you have an in-person interview, in which case you'd want a printout on the holy parchment -- you don't even have to lick anything. What time (and saliva) savings!

It's not exactly a news flash to me that job applications are now all digital. I had, after all, been on the other end of the process for years as a hiring manager. But things are very different when you are the applicant. From my current perspective, the convoluted digital application process only serves to make things easier for the employer, not the candidate. Now the applicant has to work harder than ever to find creative ways to stand out among the countless electronic submissions.

Since news of my layoff has spread, friends, family, former colleagues, longtime business associates and some very kind The Huffington Post blog readers have been extremely supportive and generous with advice and even job opportunities, for which I'm eternally grateful. I've made certain to follow up on each and every online lead, even if it doesn't seem to be an "exact fit" on first glance.

One such recommendation came by way of a wonderful editor/author friend who forwarded a "this job is perfect for you" email to me via a LinkedIn job posting. I read it over and thought it was interesting, even though I doubted the employer would see me as the "perfect" for them, given it was in a different field from my background -- but what the heck, I need a job. I followed the link and began the process of applying online.

I had no idea how much of a futile time sink this would be. LinkedIn conveyed some information from my page to the company's application screens, but the text came through all wrong and I had to retype it. No biggie, except the screens weren't exactly intuitive (for me, anyway) and I kept receiving big red "information incomplete" warnings and had to continuously redo it. It seemed like it was taking forever for each screen to load. So I waited... and waited... and waited.

Finally, my information cleared and the next screen appeared, prompting me to attach my resume. I did just that when I saw a tab offering a view of what my attachment looked like. It was a good thing I checked this out because the resume had come out garbled -- all of my fancy scripts, fonts, indentations, etc. had been translated to Greek characters.

After several failed attempts to reload the resume, I sought another route to post the resume: copy and paste it into the box. That worked fine, except for one thing: The box doesn't allow any fancy script, fonts, indentations, etc. Not only didn't I have the edge of fine Southmark paper, I didn't have the option of (as a former British boss of mine would say) "tarting it up."

Plain Jane it would have to be. It's about substance, right? All of my skills, accomplishments, years of experience...

I moved the cursor to a different box to type in my cover letter. This was pretty standard stuff, so after a thorough proofread and double-check of everything I clicked "send." Again the interminable wait. This time it became clear it really wasn't going through. What had I done wrong?

After several more minutes passed, a prompt appeared informing me you can't call the resume and cover letter boxes the same thing. Fine: I changed the name of each box from the title of the job listing to "Gary Krebs Resume" and "Gary Krebs Cover Letter." I clicked "send" a second time.

The delay happened again. The minutes went by with nothing happening until, finally, the dreaded Mac pinwheel of doom showed up. This is not good, I thought. And with that, Misty -- my majestic longhaired gray cat -- climbed onto the modem hookup, knocking everything down. The lights on the modem flashed error messages I couldn't begin to comprehend.

Needless to say, I had to shut down and restart everything. The computer worked okay -- thankfully, no further signs of the infernal pinwheel of doom -- except now I couldn't get online at all. I tried re-plugging the modem wires, but nothing worked. I restarted the computer several times. Totally dead. Who do I call to help me out? I don't exactly have access at home to an S.O.S. Helpdesk in India.

My wife came home to find her Spouse in the House helpless and frustrated, staring and cursing at the computer screen. "What's wrong?" she asked.

"The modem," I said with the sheepish look of the computer illiterate. "The damn cat knocked it over and it's busted. I just can't get it to work. "I've been trying for hours to apply to this job and now I've lost everything. I wasted the whole day without any time on my screenplay and I've gotten nowhere..."

"Let me see," she offered.

That is where I smartened up and left the office. How many times had we tried to work together to repair something and I would get all sensitive, defensive, worked up, and crazy -- as in: "I tried all that, what do you think I am, a total idiot?!!!"

I began to fix myself a snack in the kitchen when my wife casually appeared next to me. "Hopeless, right?" I asked.

"Nope, it's fixed," she answered.

"Fixed? But how...?"

"The orange wire goes into the orange input. You had it in the wrong one," she said.

"Wow," I said, deeply impressed. "Thank you."

I raced back to the computer and went online to try to reconstruct the job application. It was all gone, of course, and at that point I was no longer in the mood to face those impossible screens again. I searched for an email address of anyone who worked for that company, thinking that at the least I could apply through a simpler method. Unfortunately, after searching the listing many times, I couldn't find anything resembling an email address or contact name. I gave up: It was a long shot in a different industry anyway, I rationalized.

Instead I went on a different path, drafting my next blog installment online when, suddenly, BANG! The cat had again knocked the modem down. Before panicking or helplessly crying out for help, I noticed that the orange wire had again pried loose from the modem. "Aha!" I shouted. I immediately replaced the orange wire into the orange input, and I was back in business without losing any work. I had learned something that day, after all.

Feeling like Wile E. Coyote, Super Genius, I returned to work. It occurred to me, however, that I could use some extra dance lessons doing the Online Application Tango for future job applications. So next up: This former business publisher -- who over the years has put to market numerous bestselling job search books -- will review print and digital career advice content. Cue up the music.

For more by Gary M. Krebs, click here.

For more on mindfulness, click here.

 

Comments

[woodys machine]

02:01 PM on 01/21/2012

After reading the author's posts (in the Health section?), I wonder if he is sensitive to how they might come across as the disconnected musings of a privileged individual who just now is experiencing what it's like for most people in the economy today.

In his first post, he announced he'd been “validated” because some producer said his screenplay was good. Although Mr. Krebs had been working as a high-level executive in a publishing industry in which lower-level employees work long hours, nights, weekends, he somehow had enough luxury time to pursue the alternate career he'd prefer, while ultimately not doing enough to justify his executive-level salary. Should he have put more time into his day job and less into his hobby?

In his next post, the author wanted readers to sympathize that he can no longer afford his lawn service, his cleaning service, etc. Tough times indeed! And don’t forget for a “modest" Bat Mitzah for his daughter, he must be able to spend the equivalent of “the price of a year of college.” Solution? Have the wife who'd sacrificed her career look for a job so she can support his writing dreams now.

Sounds like that didn’t fly, so he writes here about his frustrations with online applications. Tough times indeed! But maybe someone will hire this self-dubbed professional screenwriter who two posts ago had declared "No more neck-stiffening commute, no more corporate pressure, no more making budget.”

[GARY M KREBS]

08:31 PM on 01/21/2012

Dear Woody's Machine.

Thanks for the fan mail.

I'm not sure why anyone would take the time to write such things about someone you don't know. I suspect you do know me and have a personal grudge. If this is this case, I hope you'll come to terms with your issues and bury whatever hatchet you are holding.

Yes, as I wrote in one of the installments, there are many people far worse off than I am. But I am unemployed (this blog gig is unpaid) and trying to find ways to support my family. I wonder who is being insensitive with the use of the word "privileged." I've been writing the blog as a way to help other people in a similar situation smile through it....

Here's to positive vibes for 2012.
GMK

[Janice Harper]

10:00 AM on 01/09/2012

The irony is you're more likely to be judged on your use of buzz words, than your ability to put those words together in a thoughtful and humorous essay. Well done; anyone who has been out of work for more than five minutes has been there, done that, and can use the laughs.. (And until that job comes along, try ghostwriting perhaps?)

[johnnymainstreet]

08:09 AM on 01/09/2012

The problem is that "Personal" has become "Human Resource" as other posts have suggested, their job is only to protect the company against law suits, write "employee handbooks" anything but, finding qualified candidates that would be an asset to the company. 20 years ago you could stop by a Corporate office and fill out an application in the reception area and include you resume in the application. Now, even if you have a human contact, you still have to apply on line. I'm not sure where these applications go or how they are retrieved. What's worse if you have to complete every box when you apply on line (or your application won't be processed) I don't really understand why I need to include my graduation dates other than this is a back door way to determine you age. Not to mention, a number of corporate web sites require you to supply your SS number. Can't that be supplied when your hired? The only way your resume comes out of this black hole is if a few key words match what some $9.00 hr. part time HR Clerk is keying in. 20 years ago, people, real people in a company would look at a resume and if they thought it had merit, would pass it around an organization. Back then companies were looking to hire people. Today they hire resumes, if you can get yours to pop out of their data bank.

[jdevans]

11:22 AM on 01/08/2012

Twenty years ago, when resumes were still printed on fancy paper, companies would actually mail you a reply that they had gotten your resume or that they'd found a more suitable candidate. I could have wallpapered my apartment with rejection letters. Now your resume goes into a black hole and you're lucky if you ever hear back from the company despite the fact that a computerized response wouldn't cost anything.

[MaxOrbit]

09:10 AM on 01/07/2012

This sounds exactly like my experience. I'll bet we were victims of the same software/service. The position I was going for was far more suited to me than your situation, I really wanted it. The company had recently been acquired by a really really big company that is commonly known by two letters. After 2-3 hours of red lettered "information incomplete" struggles, I gave up. Furthermore, my career history does not lend itself to the "Job A" "Job B" "Job C" format that is understandably necessary for a generic online platform. I could expound further on similar ways the internet has changed society in a negative way.

[frank1946]

08:29 AM on 01/07/2012

Be sure to attach this Story to your E-Resume, you will be out of work forever !

[atexasdem]

07:05 AM on 01/07/2012

Much of the process is actually finding a way to get your application to a real human being, preferably the hiring manager. Realize there will be several people plus a computer who's job it is to prevent that from happening. Your application will be computer scanned for specific key words. Depending on your computerized key word score your application may or may not be sent to an H.R. person. The H.R. person knows nothing about your particular job or what the hiring manager really wants. The H.R. person only knows job descriptions and requirements. These job descriptions and requirements were written and approved by various departments. These departments will include Legal, EEO, Budgeting and various "preference" compliance organizations. Your application has finally made it to the hiring manager. Wrong again, there is one more filter, His assistant. His assistant has been told to "pick out three or four of the best and leave them on my desk". His assistant has a filter. Find someone who looks good but won't be a threat to my job. Your brilliantly written, computer scored, job description compliant, legally approved, non threatening resume has made it to the hiring manager's desk.
Realize though that the advertized description was taken from a multiple choice of "approved" job descriptions which probably don't comply with what he really wants. Congratulations you survived the screenings, your on the final stack and you've got the interview. We'll cover that subject later as that's another process entirely.

[MaxOrbit]

09:13 AM on 01/07/2012

I had an inside track, and the insider told me that employees had been specifically instructed not to use the inside track.

[marinatha]

02:29 AM on 01/07/2012

Enjoyed this article.

[Robert SF]

11:47 PM on 01/06/2012

Gary, I gave you a hard time in your first posting because your excitement at being unemployed (and now being able to write screenplays for a living) came across as insensitive. But you write very humorously, and I guess you're now starting to see how it is for the unemployed. Now multiply your experience 100s of times and imagine your rent is due and you're still $200 short. I hope you use your humor to continue exposing what it's like to look for work.

[madodysseus]

11:19 PM on 01/06/2012

Good stuff Gary. I am glad others have had the same experiences. It is really interesting, when several years ago, I would tell prospective applicants to go to our website to apply and they would say, "Huh, I'm right here...here ya go. I'd reply, "You have to register and upload it."
I have the resources to go after jobs online, but I feel for those who don't and have to go to a library; a free wi-fi spot because they can't afford it at home, or, even worse; they have the "tech-gap" in their lives and can't make the leap. They can't conceptualize this process.

[jdevans]

05:19 PM on 01/08/2012

Even at job fairs, where you're talking with a company HR representative with a copy of your resume in your hand, they still tell you to apply online.

[Rozakile]

07:08 PM on 01/06/2012

Gary,
Great posting and I agree with you 100%-- the online application format (which you so aptly call a "tango") is much more beneficial for the company than the applicant. And I think that stinks.
Laurie