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Rubbernecking: Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood, Season Four Premiere

06/27/2009 05:12 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011

To recap; when we last peeked in on the lives of Tori and Dean, they were having a baby girl (Stella), Tori had published her book (Storytelling), they'd put their new house on the market and bought a bigger, newer house so they could fit their two babies and Jack, Dean's son from a previous relationship. We learn at the top of the season premiere that Dean's been getting movie roles and Tori is writing Book 2 - Mommywood (published last month). She also has a clothing and a jewelry line and is planning a Donna Martin comeback on 90210. Gotta pay for that bigger, newer house, ya know!

So as we join them again the cute couple are in bed having a martial chat - in other words, they each seem to be having a conversation that only relates to themselves and not the other person. The final topic in this convo is sex (of course) and Tori sagely notes that "Anytime a woman wants to cuddle a man just wants to poke her."

As the Southern California sunshine pours down, Tori's in the backyard writing her new book on a laptop computer as well as watching the two babies (yeah, right - this is possible. not). Her publicist calls to schedule a creative call with the producers of the 90210 remake and Tori expresses her wish that Donna should still be quirky and funny, like in the olden days. Plus of course, she wants to carry on her father's legacy (for those who don't know - who raised you, by the way? - Tori's father Aaron Spelling created Beverly Hills, 90210, among many other TV hits of yesteryear). Meanwhile Dean marvels at her ability to multitask and calls her Wonderwoman.

Throughout the show Tori moans about having to work and not being able to be a stay at home mom. She doesn't want her kids to have bad parental relationships. Her dad was a workaholic, never home except on weekends. Her mom - well, we won't go there but suffice it to say that Tori has fonder memories of her nannies.

T&D take the kids to the park because the realtors are having an open house and they need to get out of the way. Before they leave, Tori leaves fresh baked brownies on the kitchen counter. Which nobody eats, and by the way, nobody buys the house (at least not on this episode). Later on Dean reveals to Tori that he has been offered the lead in a TV movie and they start shooting next week - coincidentally, his first day on the set is their moving day. After a bit of unhappiness over this development, Tori puts on her Wonderwoman hat and declares she will be fine. Which of course she is.

Tori's got a great support system around her as it happens. She has two best friends - Jenny, a stay at home mom, and Mehran, her self-described best friend slash gay husband. She has a baby nurse for Stella. She's got some peeps. So while Dean is away playing actor-dad, her friends help Tori move and when Dean comes home from a hard day on set, she's got the new place looking pretty damn good.

However, even though Tori's given her blessing to Dean's acting job, she's very resentful and jealous about it and also about his new obsession, motorcycles. "Where's my guilty pleasure? Where's my hobby?" she says to Jenny. You see, Tori wants it all - and there's the rub. She wants to raise the kids and not have to work, she wants her book career, she wants her acting career, she wants to be an entrepreneur, she wants to design clothing and jewelry, and she wants a beautiful big house. Most people would conclude that something's got to give. And most people, at least those who participated in the text message question (read on), would also conclude that Dean is the one that should have it all since he is the man, after all.

On Dean's first day off from set he goes to motorcycle racing class to get his racing certification instead of canceling and staying home to help Tori unpack. Or at least give her some respite from caring for the kids so she can go get her nails done. After he returns they have some cuddle time with the babies in bed, talking about how they can fit everything into their insanely busy lives. Dean feels guilty after going to his class instead of staying home to help and admits he has to adjust his thinking and refocus (ya think???).

One of the most interesting things about this program is that during one of the commercial breaks they urged callers to text their response to this question: How will Tori and Dean balance it all? The choices were:
1) Dean needs to help out more
2) Tori's got to give up a project

To my utter surprise and dismay, #2 got the biggest response - 68 percent - to 32 percent for #1. I imagine the viewers are mostly women who are likely juggling the same problems Tori is, only without the famous parents, TV show, huge support system, and multitude of money-making opportunities.

Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood is on the Oxygen Network Tuesday nights at 10pm EST.