Howie Greene

Howie Greene

Posted: December 4, 2008 10:53 AM

An Embarrassment to the World's Oldest Profession - Bernie Kerik

digg Share this on Facebook Huffpost - stumble reddit del.ico.us RSS

If anyone out there knows Salman Rushdie, please have him Twitter me! For sure, following the publication of this item, I will need to find a good hiding place.

What's worse than having a jail named after you while you're still living only to have the government strip you of that honor? Well, if anyone runs into former Police Commissioner Bernie Kerik, please ask him. Then run away as fast as you can!

The Associated Press reported late last night that Rudy Giuliani's former chauffeur has had his indictment modified just in time for the holidays!

What did Bernie do wrong? Well, I may have to ask my editor for a special series, but, according to the new and improved Federal indictment, Kerik:

Filed false Federal tax returns in 2000, 2002 and 2005; took false charitable deductions; failed to report a gift of a luxury sedan; failed to mention his free home renovations; failed to mention his alleged mob ties; oh, and here's my favorite....LIED TO THE WHITE HOUSE.

That's a funny one, don't you think? Lying to the Bush White House and getting charged for it?

According to the indictment, Bernie Kerik, who in 2004, was being vetted by The White House for head of the Department of Homeland Security was asked if he had any skeletons in his closet. His answer, according to the AP, "Nope, it's all in my book." The book Kerik was referring to was his ghost-written autobiography, "The Lost Son." Bernie claimed in the tome that he is the son of a prostitute. Thanks lady!

Note to the former Commish: You don't lie to the Feds! Ask Martha Stewart. Ask the late Steve Rubell, owner of Studio 54. Ask Scooter Libby. And don't expect a pardon from George Dubya. I thought it was impossible to make him look more asinine, but Bernie, you did it.

And while we're on the subject of books, I suggest taking a peek at The Imperial Life in The Emerald City, by journalist Rajiv Chandrasekaran. It's all about the early days of Baghdad's Green Zone with stories of corruption and incompetency. Deep amongst the pages is the story of Bernard Kerik, who, fresh from his "leadership" on Sept. 11, 2001, was sent to Baghdad to train the new Iraqi police force. Chandrasekaran reports however, that Kerik slept all day, was scared to be out of his quarters, and after only a few weeks quit the assignment and disappeared from Iraq along with a huge sack of greenbacks that he was supposed to use to set up the police force.

That's a chapter in Kerik's sordid life that has yet to be written. In his defense, Kerik's lawyer claims White House vetters were vague in their questioning and therefore his client's answers were not false.

Too bad for Bernie that he didn't have those contractors also remove the skeletons while renovating his closets.

If anyone out there knows Salman Rushdie, please have him Twitter me! For sure, following the publication of this item, I will need to find a good hiding place. What's worse than having a jail named...
If anyone out there knows Salman Rushdie, please have him Twitter me! For sure, following the publication of this item, I will need to find a good hiding place. What's worse than having a jail named...
 
Comments
5
Pending Comments
0
iPhone App Promo

Want to reply to a comment? Hint: Click "Reply" at the bottom of the comment; after being approved your comment will appear directly underneath the comment you replied to

View Comments:
- Peter007 I'm a Fan of Peter007 37 fans permalink
photo

I don't know. Give the guy a break? He was an ordinary Joe that was cast in the white hot lime light of politics at the national level. I know he never planned on being a politician like Clinton or Bush. He received the benefits of his political connections and he took advantage of them. Why not? As far as lying to the Feds. I don't think thats a big deal. Anytime you are charged by the government and there is no victim, I call that a political crime. Federal prosecutors are greasy slimballs anyway. I have no sympathy for them and they don't ask for any.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:22 PM on 12/04/2008

Hero on 9/11? Hunh?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:49 AM on 12/04/2008

I for one think its sad that we are allowing BK to be destroyed in the media like this. I mean isnt it "innocent until proven guilty?" And hasn’t Mr. Kerik earned, at the very least, our loyalty until his trial is finished? I know it may be fashionable to kick a man while he is down, but lets be serious, Kerik was a hero on 9/11. As for Mr. Greene's "favorite" part, in regard to Mr. Keriks alleged "lies" to the White House, doesn’t the explanation that his attny gave sound reasonable? I mean, they ask the guy if he has any skeletons in his closet, he responds "it's all in my book." Any reasonable person could see that this question is completely vague. This sort of tabloid journalism is better served for Paris Hilton, not an American Hero. Give this man his day in court, and until then support him, he has earned it.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:51 PM on 12/03/2008
- Nommo I'm a Fan of Nommo 85 fans permalink
photo

How was he a hero on 9/11/01? What did he do that was heroic?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:55 AM on 12/04/2008
- billyboil I'm a Fan of billyboil 5 fans permalink

no...... not in america.......you sure?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:32 PM on 12/03/2008
Comments are closed for this entry

 You must be logged in to comment. Log in  or connect with 

Connect