As most couples do, my husband Eli and I have come up with our own way of sharing responsibilities and defining roles. Part of it was naturally developed throughout the years, whereas for the rest of it, well, we simply sat down and split the load based on preferences, strengths, and for the undesired chores such as laundry... we just flipped a coin.
Watching our family on "Connected" episode 6, believe it or not, was both very entertaining and upsetting at the same time. You may ask yourselves, how come? How could that be? Well, that's because I felt that the episode tells a very beautiful story on the one hand, but it tells it mostly from Eli's point of view, while my point of view was left on the editing room floor! (Boo Hoo).
The story begins when Eli shoots himself in the office, explaining about the dual guilt of trying to put in hours and prove himself in his new role at Kaltura, while trying to figure out how to balance work with family chores. From this point on, the viewers join Eli on a voyage that begins with him dropping everything at work -- through rushing to pick up our daughter Milo from school, preparing dinner for Milo and her sister Demi, cleaning up the apartment -- and ends when we see Eli falling asleep, exhausted from all this hard work. Eli, welcome to the working parents club. This is how we do it!
And if you were wondering where was I in that story, or why don't you see me supporting Eli with all the hard chores... well, you came to the right place.
Although it may sound like a bad excuse (but really, it's not), on that exact same evening, I needed to attend a business dinner and couldn't get home on time for dinner with the family. This has happened only once or twice in a good few years. Otherwise, you would have seen me sitting down at the dinner table and making sure that the girls are eating well, giving fun bath time and then getting them ready for a good night sleep.
You also didn't get to see the footage of me waking up early in the morning (while Eli was still sleeping), getting the girls dressed, preparing breakfast and making sure that they eat it, getting their bags ready for school, driving to school, looking for a street parking space next to school, bringing both girls joyfully and stress-free to school, rushing to the non-express subway line and getting to work with my tongue out, only to find out that my schedule includes back to back meetings until 6 pm. Phew!
When Eli asked me to help him out by switching roles, I was shocked. I was thinking to myself that it was either April Fool's Day, that he was completely delusional or absolutely drunk! I knew right then and there that there was no way this could work out for him. No, really. Eli CAN'T function in the mornings, he simply can't wake up early enough or deal with morning stress and drama. There was no way this could have worked out!
I tried hard to dissuade him from this unbelievably ridiculous idea, but he insisted and insisted, so I just dropped it and said to myself, fine. Let's just enjoy an easy breezy morning. But never did I expect such a breeze. It was SO easy.
Nevertheless, I do stand behind the request I made to Eli that very same evening to switch our roles back and that's because Eli's evening chores definitely make up for the morning ease... and then some!
Yours,
Ido Bendet-Taicher, the gay one in the family ☺