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Ilana Donna Arazie

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5 Simple Tips for Finding Your Life's Purpose

Posted: 10/26/10 02:33 AM ET

I wasn't raised to believe that your job and life can co-exist as one. My parents commuted to their desk jobs in the City every day. My dad was an accountant, which seemed beyond boring, albeit very helpful during tax season! My mom worked at the U.N., but when I visited her at work as a child, I was convinced that her job consisted of sifting through papers. Both of them were working hard for their paychecks and pensions.

Ever since I was laid off from my corporate position, I made it my mission to find a career that didn't feel like a job. I wanted work that felt natural, like cooking dinner. Yes, I can cook; don't look so shocked!

My mission led me to a gifted career coach named Kristina Leonardi, who took part in a Finding Your Purpose workshop I organized this past week.

During Kristina's talk, I was reminded how my parents always emphasized the importance of a secure career. I think my mother prayed that I would study economics and gave me a decided thumbs-down when I returned home from college with a psychology degree. No worries, though; I'm sure she just wanted her only daughter to live the good life.

Today, times are a changin'. Our generation has learned that we have no choice but to find jobs in line with our true purpose. "Where is the job security today? Even the most traditionally 'secure' jobs can no longer make that claim. Bankers, lawyers, top executives, hospital and government employees and educators are losing jobs, and struggling to find new positions in their fields," Kristina said.

She emphasized that this turbulent economic time, more than ever, is forcing us to dig deep, do more soul searching, find meaningful work that meshes perfectly with who we really are and create the life we want -- no matter what our family, friends or colleagues think. Boy, can they chatter!

Kristina offered the group some amazing tools for staying focused and finding your purpose:

Get to Know Yourself: We are so influenced by external forces that many of us are out of touch with our deepest desires and passions. The ancient Greek philosophers advised, "Know Thyself." Seek out classes, mentors and coaches to help you reach the core of who you are.

Get Paid to Be Who You Are: Think of Oprah, Rachel Ray and Dr. Oz; they all get paid to be themselves and do what they love. Maybe you're not cut out for prime time, but it's integral to realize that people are finding success just by being true to who they are.

Think Forward, Then Back: Not to be morbid, but how do you want to be remembered when you kick it? Take a few minutes to think about your legacy. What do you want to leave behind after your time in this world? Your answers will give you more clues to your purpose.

Take Advantage of Your Effortless Skills: Don't knock the things you do well, big or small. The skills that come easily and effortlessly are the ones you should value the most. For example, are you an amazing listener? You might be surprised that listening is a valuable skill that many people don't have. Don't take your gifts for granted; they were given to you for a reason.

Have Courage: The universe rewards risk. Take a step in the direction of your passion and purpose, and opportunities will start coming your way. You first have to make a commitment to go for the gold in your life. Apply for a dream job you never thought possible. Meet with a mentor who lives your fantasy life. Take one step and watch the fun -- and your future -- unfold.

Most importantly, Kristina reminded the group to be patient! Don't live like that high-roller on Wall Street looking for a quick fix and instant gratification; we all know how that story ends! Digging deep and finding your purpose takes time, perseverance and some elbow grease. Love the journey, because it will definitely be the best part.

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10:24 AM on 10/31/2010
Great post. The key--and this is not easy--is to match your strengths/interests etc with a specific occupation. I find that many academic programs are too general and not occupation specific--yet that is why most of us are there, to earn a better living. In most instances you have to learn what you'll be doing on the job after you're hired.
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Damiano Iocovozzi MSN NP
Director, CEO, the Thomas Edwin Walls Foundation
08:40 AM on 10/26/2010
I'm spell-bound by your post, Ms. Arazie. May I add a little more deliciousness to this experience we are fortunate to be awake for? When I was a boy, I imagined my tombstone would read something like this: 1952-2034, about 72 years or 26,000 days. To me, the hyphen was the most important thing- the space in time where I would experience what it means to be a human being. Would I live cruelty-free? Would I make everyone crazy all round me? Would I make others happy when I arrived or happy when I went away? Would I live with joy and a positive outlook? Would I have life long friends? Would I do something important during my stay or would I begrudge every minute of the time here? That hyphen made all the difference. This is what I learned finally: life is what you make of it; it's not a dress-rehearsal; we don't have a lot of time to make stupid mistakes & cause damage everywhere; I live with honor & a code of honor, even if the rest do not. I walk with knowledge that my time is finite, but my good works are infinite as the love I've given & received. There is a "there" here, it's the connection to everything. Even though there are troubles of every sort, let's worry about the life in our days, not the number of them. That's a breath-taking world view. Thanks! Visit me at http://www.soonerorlaterbook.com
08:08 AM on 10/26/2010
Maybe this economic meltdown will cause a re-thinking of what a well-lived life is. "Meaningful work" may pay less, but may reward our souls. Are we here to acquire/consume, or could we be here to interact in a caring way with others and express our individually unique natures? Too many choose careers for income-potential. Maybe less stuff and more loving connectedness and self-expression will create more joy for all!