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Imani Perry

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The Color We See But Don't Speak: How Race Impacts Our Kids

Posted: 05/18/10 03:38 PM ET

This week Anderson Cooper 360 is airing a four-part series on a CNN commissioned study that examines how children view skin color. The results of the study, led by University of Chicago professor Margaret Beale Spencer, show that white children show a high bias towards white skin, and black children show a less, but still significant bias toward white skin as well. The children who were subjects of the research were in two age groups, 4-5 and 9-10.

I must say that the study, while heartbreaking, is not surprising. I am the mother of two African American boys, ages 4 and 6. In our household we talk about race frequently, we celebrate African American literature, music, and art. We teach appreciation for our culture and other cultures. We immerse them in the beauty of our ethnic tradition. However, even with all of this deliberate effort, it is a serious uphill battle to work against the image of race they are exposed to on a daily basis.

My elder son repeatedly comments on the marginality or complete absence of Black characters in virtually all children's television programming except what he, of his own accord, calls "black shows." He already knows that he is designated as the sidekick in this society. So do his classmates.

But more than that, he knows that for Black characters, lighter skin is valued, particularly on programming for tweens. It is even more dramatic for girls. I cannot recall the last time I saw a brown or dark skinned black girl on a mainstream children's television show besides that lone wolf of racial inclusion Sesame Street. Even when the parents are dark skinned, the girls are significantly lighter. The same issue exists in advertising in children's magazines and catalogs.

When Harry Reid's comment about Obama's light skin and absence of "Negro dialect" hit the media, my first thought was of children and how they probably also knew that Obama's lighter skin made a difference to many of the adults around them. After all, it clearly matters when it comes to the celebrities we teach them to admire, and even for the cartoon characters we entertain them with.

What happens on television and in print media gets repeated out in the world. I recently took my boys to the beauty supply store one day because I needed to buy some barrettes. They marveled at the rows and rows of long flowing wigs and weaves in this store catering to Black women. In that moment they learned that for many Black women hair that looks and feels like something completely different from what grows out of their heads is vastly preferred. And they were being taught something about what the world considers beautiful. How much will it matter, I wondered, that I model a celebration of our hair and skin, with a world speaking against me?

There are times when, at the bookstore, we have opened children's books dedicated to some hero in African American history, and found the troubling phrase "a good slave master" as in "Henry Box Brown had a good master" as though there wasn't a fundamental evil to holding people in life long inherited bondage. What does it mean to a Black child when we soft pedal the most inhumane feature of the Black experience in the United States?

My children are often witnesses when we (parents, grandparents, other adult caretakers) experience racist micro-aggressions: the change that is dropped on the counter instead of returned to the hand, the failure of retail sales people to make eye contact, the clutched purses, the rude responses, the greetings that we offer that are not returned, the clerks who follow us in stores. They see the adults who love and care for them, who diligently teach them to be kind and respectful and hard working, treated unfairly on the basis of race. This experience is normal for children of color in the United States.

All of our children see race. They see the differences in the way we are depicted and treated. They see the gaps in our socioeconomic conditions that are so highly influenced by race. When we don't talk to them about race and inequality, the only way they have to make sense of it all is to assume that there is a greater human value for those who by accident of birth are white.

I am a professor in the Center for African American Studies at Princeton University. By the time I get to talk to young people about race they are on the brink of adulthood. They are formed in many ways. But each day in the classroom with them yields so much. My students are bubbling over with the desire to learn, understand and make sense of race: this taboo subject that has been around then every single day. I immerse them in a great deal of scholarly research and analysis of race, to allow them to develop deep understandings of how it has operated and how it continues to matter. I am appreciative that these conversations are a central part of my life's work. However, I hope that this CNN series will encourage parents, schools and community organizations to begin these conversations with young people sooner, to demand better from our media and our communities, and to continue to educate ourselves along with our children, about race.

 

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03:21 PM on 05/27/2010
I teach my four young children that God created all men equal. Not one segment of society is better than another and what race you are is not an accident. It was predetermined before you came here. God has a plan for each of his children to achieve and grow to their highest potential. Find him and you will find your purpose here on earth and he will help you fullfull that purpose. We must judge others on the content of their character, not on the color of their skin. Any obstacle that is placed in our way is an opportunity to become strong and develop character as we work to overcome that obstacle. I am NOT a victim of my race. Their is PURPOSE in who I am. I choose my own path and with God's assistance I can overcome any obstacle in my life.
01:01 PM on 05/24/2010
My two daughters 6,9 attend a mostly white school and watch more disney channel than anything where this no real african american lead roles. They are both fairly light skinned but expressed wanting to be white so they can be treated better in school. Next year I am placing them in a school that is 80% black/hispanic for two reasons. 1. Experience the culture shock of going from a "well to do" school to another school where they may see things differently towards the end. 2. I want to see how they are treated in an enviroment where they actually become the light skinned black children. I know the hispanic will be lighter but that just adds to how they will be catagorized by their peers. It is an experiment on my part but it will reveal a lot of info for how I teach my children in the future about culture relations. My wife disagrees. She wants them to go to a "christian school" but since I am athiest I am completely against that. My theory is that they will be more appreciated by their peers because of their skin tone than for any other reason.
12:06 PM on 05/24/2010
sorry but you spoke when watching tv. let him watch sports and the president that should clear things up. the problem i see is it happens with all races or people of similar religious back grounds tend to gravitate to those who are similar. but it also happnes because of racist people and i include all in that staement as all groups are racists in some ways and some will always blame others for all the problems.
07:54 AM on 05/24/2010
Interesting article and some good insights however I would challenge this one line, ".....soft pedal the most inhumane feature of the Black experience in the United States?......."

You took the phrase "good slave master" out of context both literally and figuratively. There was such a thing as good and bad slave owners. Slavery was as common place in that era as smoking a pipe. People of that ethnicity and environment accepted it and were raised to accept it. Africans in Africa accepted it and perpetrated it. History is history lets not rewrite it with our own version, lets let the facts stand for themselves.

I haven't seen alot of childrens morning shows but when I do watch, I see more black and children of color than I ever did when I was growing up. We had The Jackson Five and Haji from Johnny Quest thats about it. I do not believe we are as moved or changed by TV as we are our real life friends and neighbors. I had many different types of friends and didnt think much about color as a racial issue. The negatives I got were from family who used derogatory phrases to condemn poor character and behavior. We were aware of it then as ugly desperate ignorance adn we were children not because the TV shows guided us but because our friends were not the same as adults described them.
03:46 PM on 05/24/2010
Pippen , i must challenge your assertion that there was such a thing as a "good slave owner. please explain, as the writer alluded to how a person that was willing to enslave another human being was somehow "good". Slavery while certainly wide spread was not neccessarly as "common as smoking a pipe" because it was not legal in most of the northern states. Slavery as an institution was horrific, and even in the "best" case you still denied freedom to other human beings, woman were raped with no chance of redress, children were sold off like cattle from their parents and men were often times beaten if they showed any sign of anger and if they had the audacity to show any real aggression were lynched just to keep the others in line.

As far as people "of that ethnicity accepting it" who are you talking about because not all White people accepted slavery and certainly not all Black people accepted slavery. many people from the very beginning (1619) railed against the practice, history is repleate with literature about this fact. to close please allow me to disabuse you of one last false assumtion, Africans while it is true did enslave their own people did not enslave them based on color which is what American slavery was largly based on.
06:56 PM on 05/22/2010
If I point out something that could be viewed as racist in nature, you aren't proving to me that you aren't a racist by calling me one and acting like I haven't had a set of life experiences separate from yours. You would do me a bigger service to LISTEN to my complaint and see if there was a way to solve the discrepancy. That is basic human compassion. For example, at different times in my life I have been the only black guy (light-skinned) in the group when the N-bomb was dropped and I was offered apologies that consisted of "you know we weren't talking about you." One was an incident at the private school I attended for HS and the other was sitting in the Officer's Club in Newport, RI. These are only a couple of the incidents I've experienced and not the only ones. How insulting would it be to tell me I was "looking for" racism? Why not just acknowledge that racism needs to be curbed?

To use the criticism of SOME blacks of Gen. Powell or Mr. Cosby and say the black community needs to get itself together is just as bad at its root as saying all whites agree with racist policies. Not all blacks disagreed with them, but it confirms the point of the author about images presented. If outside of the "black shows" there are few positive images of positive blacks, don't you think that's a legitimate concern?
06:51 PM on 05/22/2010
This was a very nice piece by the author. The discussion regarding the piece is another matter. Let's start with a few premeses that always seem to get confused:

1) All white people are not racist AND do not have the ability to enforce said racism.
2) All black people that point out racism are not race baiters and do not live to look for racism.
3) If YOU aren't racist, then stop acting like a hit dog. It's the same principle your parents taught you about being teased. If it doesn't apply to you, then stop taking it to heart.
4) If someone doesn't see a specific incident as being racist, that doesn't make them a racist.
5) Race problems will NEVER be solved by pointing fingers or living in denial of racism. Just as you don't have to prove you're not a racist by citing the number of black friends you have, someone doesn't have to have pictures of a cross and the cowards in white robes on their lawn to prove they've experienced racism.
01:12 PM on 05/22/2010
Thank you, Imani, for the depth and insight you brought to this piece. I hope that the post helps people to see what we are letting happen to Black people in this nation. Sadly, many people are willfully blind to both race bias and injustice in our society but your post did a great job of shining a light on things.
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Jehan S. Harney
02:12 PM on 05/21/2010
I agree with Imani, popular media need to be more responsive and reflective of our diverse communities without necessarily perpetuating the negative stereotyping of our colors. Great job, Imani!
12:17 PM on 05/21/2010
I remember my 3-year-old sister looking out the window at a black person walking down the street and saying, "Mommy, I don't like brown people." (I was 9 at the time). My mom said, "Well, what about Karen?" (One of our babysitters.) My sister: "Oh, she's different."

I must agree that racial attitudes are formed very young.
12:12 PM on 05/21/2010
I think I'd like to take one of your classes, you seem like you'd be a fun and engaging professor.
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Tresco
Sistagirl Laughin' Thingy Award Winner!
05:53 PM on 05/19/2010
I am for judging people one at a time as they themselves deserve. Fools make generalizations about entire groups based on skin color. Dividing people into different "races" is wrong. Believeing that you are "owed" something because of what happened to previous generations is self-destructive.
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twila helton
10:16 AM on 05/21/2010
Tresco---Thank you! Well said.
01:15 PM on 05/22/2010
Actually, here in America, the most common thing to do is pre-judge and marginalize Black people.
05:42 PM on 05/19/2010
I think fat people, short people and brunettes need our empathy.
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Unitynow8
Liberal World Citizen
01:00 PM on 05/23/2010
thanks
04:11 PM on 05/19/2010
Well, I was ready to contribute my opinion on the article, which was very well written and interesting, but I think it may be more important to point out to all those tolerant liberal folks here that would scream to high heaven if someone were to use a derogatory term or slur to describe a black person, but feels perfectly comfortable slurring an entire group of people with the sexual slur "teabaggers." Shame on all of you who used it. You are no better than those who use the "n" word.
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05:25 PM on 05/19/2010
You should always go with your first thought. Invariably, the second one is of little consequence or signifigance.
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Semprini
The Dept. of Redundancy Dept.
08:09 AM on 05/20/2010
Why do you consider it a slur? I hear it can be a great deal of fun.

If you can't figure out how incredibly low quality it is to compare "teabagger" to the n-word, then you clearly can't feel shame.
01:55 PM on 05/19/2010
love your use of the term "racist micro-aggressions." just perfect. this is a strong article. thank you!
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Rudy2shoes
Retired Administrator
11:40 AM on 05/19/2010
None of us really understands the racial atmosphere in America because we have created a false set of terms and phrases that constitute racism for our own purposes. We have even commandeered words and altered their meaning to satisfy our need for political profanities. They’re words that we can thereby evoke to explain away every unpleasant or failed experience that we have with a single utterance. And, these utterances are trump; we allow no rebuttal or argument to the contrary. This ensures that “racism” will not be discussed unless it is on our terms, and if you attempt to do so, well you must be a racist. “Discrimination” is the prime example followed closely by “racism.” They are not, as popularly defined and utilized, either evil by definition or mutually inclusive. So if we can’t use language to discuss an issue, just how do we inform and educate? Are we stalled at square one?
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05:04 PM on 05/19/2010
None of us? Who is us, specifically?
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Rudy2shoes
Retired Administrator
05:32 PM on 05/19/2010
That is just the point isn't it? It is universal, unless of course you do.