We are never completely satisfied with what is happening in this moment. In fact, the idea that we need something that is not present right now is the root of our discontent. Even when we achieve everything we always wanted, we feel there is something missing. Why? Because we are so accustomed to waiting for something more that nothing is ever enough. We have cultivated the habit of feeling dissatisfied to such an extent that it has become the norm. This is true for rich and poor, for the loneliest and most extroverted of us all. The perception of inherent lack, of a carrot that is always just out of reach, serves only to guarantee our suffering.
Yet if you shift your attention to being instead of obtaining, and focus on experiencing this moment in its fullness instead of on the suffering caused by the absence of your desire, you will be open to receive, to truly see everything that life is bringing you in each moment. There is nothing wrong with desire, but in order to desire without suffering, you must desire without attachment. Be present, and let go of the idea of how things should be in order for you to feel satisfied. Your state of being is what matters; that is what can bring you joy. We think that what we get will bring us joy, but when we are present in this moment, the energy of joy is abundant, and the only thing it brings is more joy. You are that happiness. You are that joy. It doesn't depend on your external circumstances.
Observe your mind. Often you will find that when you feel something is missing and cannot rest until you have achieved it, it is just an excuse to not be present and to suffer. These are the tricks of the mind that keep you separate from self: if you were totally present, without any distractions, you could no longer avoid the unknown depths that lie within.
In reality, there is nothing to fear, for how can you be afraid of love? It's impossible: it would be like fearing the air that we breathe. Open to embrace the unknown, to let go of the control of what you think you need in order to be happy, and you will open to receive the wonderful, magical surprises life has in store.
Isha Judd is an internationally renowned spiritual teacher and author; her latest book and movie, "Why Walk When You Can Fly?" explains her system for self-love and the expansion of consciousness. Learn more at www.whywalkwhenyoucanfly.com.