My last few posts have had to do with having a great new year, without repeating the old, and useless (for many) New Year's Resolution. The topic has come up a lot and the people I talk to tend to argue for the 'not enough time' conundrum and I try to get them to just 'try it' for a while.
If you're convinced that 'that's just the way it is' and feeling stuck in a rut I urge you to try a course, take a chance and 'live in the possibility' that you actually can reinvent yourself, master time and live a life of genuine satisfaction, joy and contentment.
If you try, by the way, you stand a much better chance of having a breakthrough than if you dismiss the possibility as a 'never happen'.
Below is a sample week's instruction that I offer for free at www.doityourselflifecoach.com. I provide it here because it is topical for this time of year when the days are shorter and we realize that life is a limited commodity. Facing a New Year, I invite all of you to take the entire course, The Game of Life, and see what you can get 'up to' that will make this year the best of your entire life.
Week Four: Consider that, like a game, there is a clock running and it will run out.
"How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives." Annie DillardIt's not the time that's behind us that counts as much as it is the time ahead of us - but who knows how much time we have left. So let's get to it, ok?
This week we'll focus on efficiency and use and mastery of time. It's going to be all about discipline. How much time a week do you spend on 'well spent' items and 'wasted' items? Let's find out by first taking a look back at last week before looking forward to this week.
Create a chart with two columns. Label one column 'well spent' and one 'wasted'. Under the 'well spent' column make a list of all the things you did last week in which you found value, from which you felt some sense of being fully self-expressed, engaged and joyful. Now fill in the 'wasted' column with those things which left you numb, empty and feeling wasted.
The next step may surprise you. Circle all of the items under 'wasted' that you needed to do in order to just give yourself a break or to recharge.
For example, watching TV, while mostly 'wasted' time, can actually be the 'down time' you need so that you can recharge and be sharp and attentive during the other activities of life. It's like driving a car without ever stopping to check the oil or fill up the gas tank; eventually you'll break down. Consider limiting, or spending a little less time on the 'wasted' items that you plan to keep.
Next take all of the 'wasted' items that you don't want to have in your life and cross them off of the list. That doesn't mean you didn't do them last week, it just means you're identifying them as 'true wastes' that can eat up precious time.
Now take out your appointment book or calendar and make a note to repeat all of the 'well spent' items that you can get to this week and add others that you want to do but didn't get to. Make a commitment that if it shows up in your calendar this week that you actually do it. Try to fill the coming week with as many 'well spent' items as you can.
Every morning, before you start your day, remind yourself of this quote: "How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives".
Take the quote with you by posting it at your work station, using it as a screen saver on your phone, carrying it on a slip of paper in your pocket, etc. Do your best, each day, to fill your life with moments that 'count' and, at the end of each day, take some time to journal about it.
Don't worry about complaining about time you've wasted in the past; that will waste time now and, if not stopped, in the future.
Don't forget the lesson that happens every day at train stations around the world. The train pulls out of the station and you are either on it or you're left behind. No amount of complaining, explaining or theorizing will put you on that train.
Take the steps you need to be on the train, baby, and get moving!
Follow James M. Lynch on Twitter: www.twitter.com/JamesLynchCoach
Mark Eckhardt: PBS's 'This Emotional Life': Zen Strategies for Getting 'Unstuck'
Resolution - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Green-up your New Year's resolutions
7 ways to keep your resolution to work out
Gretchen Rubin Spent A Year Researching 'The Happiness Project'. Can It Help You?
You are in charge.
Kristen Houghton is the author of the new book "And Then I'll Be Happy! Stop Sabotaging Your Happiness and Put Your Own Life First' published by GPP Life.
Thanks for the thought. I agree that the preparation is important and keep all of my coaching to action oriented and results producing. You may like the Biggest Possible Future process at www.doityourselflifecoach.com. It contains an assessment, a list and an action sheet; simple stuff but very effective.
One last thing about the train: Too many people believe that being late, plus a good excuse, equals being on time. They'll even argue with you -- that's when it's nice to point to the train in the distance.
Good luck with your book.
In one of my linked-in groups, there was a thread of over 200 favorite quotations. It was a mixture of the inspirational, motivational, and sarcastic.
The most quoted seemed to be Albert Einstein, "Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted......."
Yogi Berra," If you don't know where you're going, you'll end up somewhere else".
And Mary Kay, ""When somebody ask you, "How are you" I want you to say, "Great"! no matter what. If you don't think you are great, nobody else will either" "
I like the Annie Dillard quote you chose because it is a very simple reminder about "the way it is."
Now, all I have to do is live it!
One of my favorite quotes is from Hamlet, of course: From this time forth, my thoughts be bloody or be nothing worth . . ." I've always loved it and over New Years I saw Gone With The Wind for the first time (really, no kidding) and there's a scene where Scarlet says 'I'll never go hungry, etc., etc.' It seemed to me to be Scarlet's Hamlet moment.
Or be nothing worth . . . Go for it Don.