In the last few weeks we've had Mother's Day and Father's Day and I hope you enjoyed whichever is applicable (and if both, write me and explain). I know that my Father's Day was one of the best ever and it's worth the diversion to explain it.
Here's what happened: this Father's Day was also the first day of sleep away camp for my two eldest -- a girl, 13, and a boy, 10 -- so I had an 8 hour round trip with the whole family. That may not be the best way to spend it according to some but for me it was great. Sparing the rest of the details, it was great because during the drive my kids were watching a video that I wanted to see too. Instead of driving, as usual, my wife took the wheel and I sat in the back row of our minivan to see the movie.
It doesn't matter what the movie was, it matters that I sat with my kids, next to them "in their space," and it was a shift I enjoyed. My kids and I are close already, no complaint there, but to sit with them on the drive was the most self indulgent thing I did that day. My kids each took a turn leaning on me, hugging me, holding my hand and we talked about the movie together, but mostly it was just the ease of being one of them that made the day special. Of course, on the way home it was just my wife, my youngest and me, but the ride up to camp was still great. That's what gives me the idea for a "ME Day."
Mother's Day and Father's Day celebrate on aspect of ourselves. Both days are about that role and the people, like our children and spouse, who are involved in the context of parenthood and, depending on how you celebrate, it means being spoiled and getting some gifts. We share the days as we aren't a mom or dad without others; make sense?
But how about a day for just YOU? How about a day where you take stock of the accomplishments of the year, a day of personal inventory and acknowledgment, a day of spoiling yourself for the very fact that you exist?
You may think this is what a birthday is about and it's close, I agree, but I'm suggesting a variation here. A birthday, again, often involves others. Your co-workers, spouse or partner, boyfriend or girlfriend, or whoever is in your life right now, celebrate it with you. Maybe you're alone or you ignore your birthday, so rather than argue the point, I'll let you do what you want for your birthday and let's get back to "ME Day."
On "ME Day" you get to recall the year, the high points of being "you" in relationship with "you" and only "you." You can buy yourself a card, take yourself out to lunch, buy yourself a gift, etc. but, like either of the parent days, it's about the fact that you ARE, not about highs and lows or good or bad.
"ME Day" is a day to just breathe and be, to spend with the most important person in your life, YOU, and to say, "I appreciate all you're doing and I know you're doing the best you can!" Like when I sat in the passenger's section of the minivan on Father's Day, on "ME Day" you can get out of the driver's seat and just enjoy the ride.
As a matter of fact, I've already suggested enough structure and it's about YOU, after all. The only thing to do now is for you to schedule the day, clear your usual schedule, tell people you're unavailable for the day and go for it. Spend an entire day with YOU and see what a difference it makes in your life.
Come on, can't you afford ONE day out of the year to honor the one person without whom you truly wouldn't exist?!
If you take this on I'd love to hear about it ... Enjoy!
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