Today is my 29th birthday.
Before I woke up, I was having a dream in which Owen Wilson was completely in love with me.
But then, I woke up, and I remembered that I was now 29, as of 8:05 AM. And in pretty much the same place I've been in since I was 19. If I didn't have to eat or pee, I'd still be hiding under my covers.
Actually, one thing will be much different this year: Barack Obama will be inaugurated on January 20th, which makes this weekend Inauguration Weekend. The mood across the country is ebullient. We are all collectively thrilled at the prospect of the Obama presidency, but some of us are even more thrilled that George W. Bush is leaving.
No wonder my 20s sucked -- George W. Bush was president for nearly the entire time! This gives me hope for my 30s, even though I'm still not quite there yet. (Don't ask about the When Harry Met Sally moment during which I forgot I was turning 29 and not 30, then rounded all the way up to 40. And then panicked.) But what a kickoff, huh? Not exactly like the contentious inauguration of W., which was preceded by a Supreme Court battle that resulted in appointing a president, giving him a legal, not an electoral victory. To say nothing of a harshly divided country. And as a result, the country was in a bad mood. I don't have to describe the years that would follow, nor do I have to remind everyone how good it felt when the election was called for Obama in November. He will be going into office with the confidence of nearly 75% of the country.
My 20s were spent going in circles, throwing figurative spaghetti at the wall to see what would stick, and it all fell off. It felt like for every step I took forward, I would fall two steps behind.
But you know what? So what??
Maybe I won't achieve anything "before the age of 30." But why the hell should I have expected to peak by now? My great-grandmother lived to be 101 and to see her great-great-grandchildren. I think there's a chance that I've got some time here. (I also still get carded when I buy alcohol. So at least there's that too.) If I'm in the same place at 40, maybe then I'll start to freak out a bit more. And I'm sure the low-grade, sustained anxiety attack I've been having since I hit 27 will wax before it wanes. But right now there is so much for the country to look forward to, and this new mood will give all of us the hope we need. And the change.
And maybe I'll have completely convinced myself of all that stuff. In the meantime, I will be looking for an Inauguration Day party in NYC and keeping my options open. And hoping for more dreams about Owen Wilson.
Also: It's worth mentioning that it's not just my birthday today -- our next First Lady Michelle Obama turns 45 today!