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Jamie Lee Curtis

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Hindsight

Posted: 11/10/11 11:48 AM ET

Is that what he said? Excuse the pun -- or shall I say STUN -- but that is exactly what was seen, the hind end of an adult sodomizing a child and now Coach Paterno is trying to say that in hindsight he would have done things differently. This is not some zeitgeist obsession, some starlet's misadventures; or some pop star's death-bed being sold by cheesy profiteers; or some stupid slur that causes a new Oscar host; or a dumbstruck moment live in a debate by a presidential wannabe. We are talking about the alleged rape of a 10-year-old boy in the shower that was basically ignored by a group of greedy men wanting to protect the Church, I mean, College.

I have read what is being reported and if these allegations are true then the abuse and sexual attacks on needy young men, reaching out for help from an institution designed to help them and their getting sodomized in the shower in return is a stain on Penn State, its administration, the coaches, its campus police department and of course the very person inflicting this horrific damage, Jerry Sandusky. The protection of these men and their jobs is as shocking as the scandal in the Catholic Church, the silence and secrecy and payouts. They should all come clean and beg forgiveness for the damage inflicted on these young men, their families, the students at Penn State and the world as a whole.

"If I knew then what I know now" doesn't count here. There is no excuse. There are no words. There is no apology. Just tell the truth. The truth is what we all want and they should all spend the rest of their lives working on behalf of the victims and their recovery.

This is a disgrace.

 
 
 
 
 
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05:19 PM on 11/22/2011
I was born and raised in State College. I have known many of the individuals involved in this nightmare since I was a child. I wish I could convey the absolute heartbreak I feel knowing that, first and foremost, children and parents that placed their trust in people that I myself looked up to, were victimized in so many ways. There is also, however, the secondary heartbreak of knowing that both my beloved hometown and so many wonderful memories of growing up at "Penn State", have been all but destroyed by the actions of a handful of people.
03:30 AM on 11/16/2011
I couldn’t agree more with you Jamie, well said. When I hear the men of Penn state defend their lack of inaction, it convinces me there was an understanding and the hindsight excuse does not apply.

If Joe Paterno in hindsight understands he “should have done more”, now is his time to prove it. If Penn state wants “to do the right thing” now is the time to prove it. If Mike McQueary was at the time overwhelmed with the details in hindsight now is the time for courage and truth telling.

What we see them do instead is posture to evade liability as they did over 15 years regarding Sandusky. The university and Paterno are dodging the possibility of civil damages and McQueary is set to reframe his answers to the grand jury. The story is set to wash and repeat they’ll do just enough to produce no real results then when the fallout manifests 15 years later they’ll claim in hindsight “I should have done more”.

It feels like there are two types of boys, the boys of Penn state and the boys of the second mile. The first are winners and the second are fodder for Sandusky. The first have a voice and the second have been silenced for years because Penn state did not do the right thing when it mattered.
08:24 PM on 11/14/2011
If there was ever a reason for a football program to receive the 'death penalty' this is it. How any man could witness this abuse and not move in to stop it, is unbelievably shameful.
08:23 PM on 11/14/2011
"If I knew then what I know now" doesn't count here...
To the extent that some method most apply to know that you are dead wrong, yes it does apply.
But looking back, from the perspective of Joe Paterno, this was his shop. These guys were his team. This was his watch. If he never saw a child on that campus matters not. It was his watch. The buck lands on his desk. In an instant of denial, he invalidated any game he ever won as though he had cheated. Any praise he ever earn through obvious hard work, brains and raw will is negated. I speak not as a father, but as a Dad and as a man. Any rape, harrassment or abuse must first be immediately stopped, then reported, then finally punished. But first stopped. By letting it happen, he lost the capability to be trusted or to lead anyone onto a sports field or anywhere else. Hindsight, be damned. Open your eyes!
03:29 PM on 11/14/2011
Speaking of hindsight, I wonder what the coaches planned to do , when these young men decided to go out for the football team ?
09:59 PM on 11/13/2011
"The truth is what we all want and they should all spend the rest of their lives working on behalf of the victims and their recovery."

On highway road crew, in chains and orange overalls!
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TNTtnt
Spend Your Days As You Want To Spend Your Life
07:27 AM on 11/14/2011
Absolutely....
11:43 PM on 11/14/2011
Chain gang is too good for them. Why let them outside and breathe fresh air? I say, keep them locked-up in the same cell every day, with a huge muscle-bound guy who wants a "woman". Then, MAYBE they will understand what Sandusky did to those boys.
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Bonnie511
09:13 PM on 11/13/2011
Truer words were never spoken. Until those who cared about those "babies" spoke up for them, when this story broke, it was all about poor Joe Paterno, even students rioting because their beloved coach was fired(rightfully so), not because children were abused and traumitized for life. It is a pathetic world we live in when money, so-called pillars of communities, institutions, churches, and what they "pretend" to stand for trump the innocence and protection of our children.
11:47 PM on 11/14/2011
Bonnie511: I agree 100 percent! What about our children??? Their innocence has been stolen from them, never to return... OR be repaired! It is disgusting what this predator has been allowed to get away with. They condoned his behavior by not stopping it the first time it was discovered! And then, Sandusky thought that if they didn't do anything the first time, that was his license to continue!! How dare HE or THEY??? I hope they rot in prison.
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09:01 PM on 11/13/2011
Contact info available online for President Rodney Erickson at Penn State (I just sent him an email and quoted your article Jamie Lee):
Name: RODNEY ALLEN ERICKSON
E-mail: president@psu.edu or pres@psu.edu
Address: 0201 OLD MAIN UNIVERSITY PARK
Telephone Number: +1 814 865 2505
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Leucothea
06:13 PM on 11/13/2011
'The Truth' is the ivy of corruption that twists its tendrils in and through every part of major college sports. Big Money (for the few) and greed, exploiting the young (and their families) while blowing a thick smokescreen of talk about 'manhood' and such. Yes! 'Manhood'....
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05:29 PM on 11/13/2011
you said it Jamie, its a disgusting shame, but what else is new, children get abused constantly in our society, and men protect men, whether in churches or other places of power.
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lainey
Always remember Troy Davis.
06:00 PM on 11/13/2011
Women in power protect other women in power as well. As a former foster parent, I saw many female social workers and female child advocates cover-up and blame the children when they finally had the courage to speak up. They let people who were not suppose to be foster parents continue parenting, they insisted children return home when the children spoke of ongoing or unresolved abuse in their family of origin, they called the children "liars" and "manipulative" and they said that parents who abused them got better after "taking a class." Power is power and that system runs with immunity; they know they can do whatever they want. We are in agreement ultimately...our children are abused constantly by systems made up of people who were suppose to protect them. It is a sickening shame.
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08:31 PM on 11/13/2011
Hi Lainey - you are so right of course, bravo for being a foster parent, I don't think I could do it.. How could the child advocates collude that way? Thats just sickening. Everyone says the children are our future, well then our future is f'd ain't it! Put your money where your mouth is governments..and everyday people stand up for children that are abused, I can't understand it when people look the other way.. how do they sleep at night.
In Canada (in Manitoba where I'm from for sure), the native indian bands now control child welfare on the reserves, and several kids have died from lack of accountability, corruption.. small communities where abusers are covered up for, kids returned to horrible family situations.
I'm praying for all the suffering kids out there tonite. We need to have an OccupyPennState or OccupyChildWelfare offices!
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OleLadySquawking
'Trickled' on since 1987!
04:55 PM on 11/13/2011
Most childhood victims could only hope that there had been an eye witness to their rape. The fact that one of them had one and nothing was done to stop it is fightening. If before this you couldn't trust the coach now you know that you can't trust anyone else in the system to act in your child's defense. Shame on all involved in passing the buck.
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AMERIKA
Husband, Parent, Sibling, Business Owner, Progress
04:45 PM on 11/13/2011
My thought exactly! Except all who knew should spend time behind bars as an accessory to the crime after the fact.
05:44 PM on 11/13/2011
My thoughts exactly, Amerika.....
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lainey
Always remember Troy Davis.
03:20 PM on 11/13/2011
What happened to these children is beyond disgusting and sadly, it happens in many institutions throughout our country. As a former foster parent, I have seen time and again, social workers, heads of CPS,other fosters parents that everyone knew should not be a foster parenst, judges, and the child's advocate send children back into abusive homes because they said the children where "lying" and "manipulative." Our systems put the children on trial and not the adults. Just as in this case--as the allegations are not sudden, it began in 1998--our children in foster care deal with abuse of all kinds each day. Now is the time to open the doors into this sickening system and any good member of the system would agree it should be done. When we spoke up for the children, everyone...from the judge, to our elected official, to the social workers, the child advocate, the child advocate's director, didn't want to rock the boat. The sad thing is that when the next horrible incidence occurs, we will all move on. No one will care and the story will leave the headlines. One looks to the story in the local Harrisburg news to see it so...it was written well over 2 years ago and everyone turned the page.
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vginger
02:49 PM on 11/13/2011
Thank you Jamie and ...its about time .
Someone has the nerve...the courage to speak plain.

I cannot bring myself to read the report....just thinking about the pain and the fear those children ...any abused child...endures is to much for me. I have a very vivid imagination.
I imagine the surprise the child may have felt at first and then the fear...and then the pain.
Did he know someone had walked in on this crime...did he dare hope for a moment that someone would help him?
I can't write this without crying.
Many years ago I was surprised by a relative in an attempted rape...when I looked up and saw him coming towards me, I thought, I am going to die...I was about 8 years old...I still remember the ugly look on his face and the smell of his body.
I was fortunate. Someone did interrupt us before he could begin but I have had my whole life changed because of that one experience.
So I have a pretty good sense of the fear the child experienced.
I have a feeling many who are reading your post have had similar experiences
.
Children have no rights unless they are backed up by responsible adults.
Any one involved in this and other cases like this should hang their heads and yes, beg forgiveness for the cowardly acts...by the rapist...by those who observed and did nothing!
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Danigirl1968
Progressive registered as NP... I AM in the 99%!
02:33 PM on 11/13/2011
Has anyone put any thought into what this scandal created? Typically, sexual abuse produces sexual abusers.

Statistics prove (and don't get me wrong here... individually NONE of us are a single statistic) that once a child is sexually abused, the tendency is for them to continue the abuse... it thwarts the child's mind making sexual abuse an open door.

Sandusky was more than likely abused - no one's even looked into that. I'm sure no one cares...but if he was, it was just be more statistical evidence that the abused typically turn and do it too. Which would mean these boys that Sandusky raped MAY in fact turn to do the very same thing...

The whole story is disgusting. How any grown man (28yo) could witness this act and not 'lose his mind' long enough to rip Sandusky to shreds (yes while naked and wet in the shower) is beyond me. Can you imagine being a person who does nothing (but tell dad) after witnessing that? No you can't! You know why? Because your moral compass works.
07:27 PM on 11/13/2011
Danigirl1968. Yes I can imagine a person who does nothing after witnessing sexual abuse. Why? Because it happened to me, but went further. I was 8 yrs old and a family member saw someone abusing me. He began threatening me saying he was going to tell my parents what "I" had done, that is, unless I let him do the same. I was terrified and knowing my parents the way I did, knew they would kill me. I was trapped and felt I had no choice but to do what he said. That was decades ago. It undoubtedly left an indelible scar. But I never went on to abuse others. Years later, I finally got the nerve to confront that family and tell my family...I was unbelievably ostracized and called a liar. I was told I "should be ashamed for bringing it out now" and I "should've gotten over it by now, others do". It devastated me and after much therapy I had to let them go because the toxicity was too much. I am grateful to my husband and children who have stood by me and supported. Just know these boys have to deal with the abandonment and betrayal, and from experience, that is as painful as the abuse itself.
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08:45 PM on 11/13/2011
aww Kimmie I feel for you..you got a double double whammy of shit.. if it feels any less lonely, you're not alone, been there, not exactly but had family members who I know must have "looked the other way".. god forbid ppl "get involved". Kids have no voice/power. Also there is far more sexual abuse of children going on than we even KNOW about..I was thinking maybe that grad student who didn't call the cops when he witnessed it was perhaps a survivor of abuse himself.. not an excuse but.. its so common and we don't hear enough about the male survivors.. my male family member who I KNOW was abused has no memories of his abuse and has been an alcoholic and drug addict since the age of 11..
12:08 AM on 11/15/2011
Kimmie4: I am very sorry to hear your story. I am glad that you were able to somewhat come to terms with what has happened to you. Many children never do, and hurt themselves (or others') because they cannot deal with what is going on in their heads. I am happy you were not one of those children; although, I know you had a very hard time putting everything where it needed to be. They feel they have nowhere to turn; they do not trust adults; and like you, when they DO find the courage to tell, THEY get blamed! Victim-blaming is the norm in our society, sorry to say. We are a male-dominated, male-driven society of yesterday. Things are beginning to change, but not fast enough, in my opinion. We need to start believing children when they say that something of this nature has happened to them. Comfort them... let them know that it was not their fault, that they are not to blame. And for God's sake--- CALL THE POLICE AND REPORT THE PREDATOR!!! APPEAR IN COURT... FILE STATEMENTS... Let that child know that you love them!!!