Masks for Sale
As I travel to Ohio on my first airplane trip during this flu crisis, I am immediately taken with the advertising possibilities. As a brilliant self-promoter, after all, I am the walking advertisement for good digestive health as the Activia Lady. I realize there is a mountain of money to be made on selling your mask space to the highest bidder. It's a white rectangle, so boring that I wonder, "How long before Pepsi, Nike, and Pepsi have their logos blazoned across germ masks around the world?" I wouldn't be surprised if even Chanel makes its own, with the interlocking reversed C's -- at a premium, of course. Then, there would be the knockoff ones that would get sold on the streets of New York -- and then the people arrested for selling the fakes. Revenue everywhere.
The obvious organization to brand face masks would be drug companies anxious to sell the very medicines that could save you -- but that is so predictable. Far better would be food, fashion and entertainment. A giant 24 emblazoned on your mask. College campuses might benefit. State governments might promote tourism: "Round on the outside, HI in the middle O-HI-O." Wouldn't you pay attention if you saw Madonna dong the splits, again, on a mask? I did love the photo on some website of Speidiho or whatever the f*#% their names are, walking down the beach in Mexico, on their honeymoon, wearing bikinis and masks. The beach. Outside. At least they could have put the name of their show, do they have one? on their masks. I mean they do seem to really need more publicity.
I'm not going to lie to you. Traveling, once a fun pleasure, has now become just plain, excuse the pun, scary. The security screenings, terror potentiality everywhere, see my previous blog: "I have a terrorist's mind." Now we have to contend with germ air/warfare! A man sneezed in the coffee line at LAX this morning and the entire hallway of thousands of travelers turned and stopped, like those old E. F. Hutton ads, and glared at the poor, allergic-to-the-airport-smell guy. I have flown with obviously sick people who have the audacity to tell me that they are "allergic" with green snot and a death rattling cough and a face redder than Danny Bonaduce. I have pointed my fan/air blower toward them to deflect back their germs. Wiped the bathroom door with essential oils, washed my hands in hot soapy water and covered every entry point on my body with Purell, but really, can we stop from getting sick?
I only hope we can trust our government and news agencies to give us accurate assessments. We need to realize every day, not just in flu season, that we are humans, that we are strong and fragile. That we walk in grace every healthy day of our lives.
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Jamie, your blog makes a lot of sense and I appreciate your viewpoint. I was wondering why you didn't mention this issue on your twitter account (or provide a link to Huffpo through a tweet). Which got me wondering if @_jamieleecurtis is actually you or not? Is it? If it is great...I'
After we get our corporate-branded face masks, how about something to protect from the viral and deadly corporate hegemony ruling the world?
I thought that new drug Obamacillin would be the answer, but it has a dangerous side effect: Geithneritis.
Brilliant -- I am working on a piece on how the swine flu is helping the economy, but this astute observation escaped me.
As the Kinks said---Paranoia the destroyer!
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Not long ago, we traveled across the country next to a fellow passenger who admitted to the two of us who sat alongside this passenger that this person had a serious, contagious disease as well as a MRSA infection that was resisting treatment. The flight was packed and there were no other seats available. Following the flight and on the ground, we contacted the airline's risk manager and she told us that she would suggest to the airline's Board of Directors to install hand wipes on the airplane and institute a protocol requiring airline attendents to spray the bathroom stalls with antibacterial spray including handles and doors during the flight. The present flu epidemic is only one of many pathogens and probably not the most lethal. It is time for airlines to use the appropriate reverse airflow as well as institute public health measures that protect their passengers and crews.
Jamie Lee, I am a huge fan of both your work in film and in promoting Activia yogurt. A friend told me that Activia yogurt is going to start coming out in a more concentrated suppository form, can you confirm if that leak is true? If so, I will be very excited to see you promoting it and to give it a try myself! Thanks to Activia, well, let's just say I'm feeling a lot more like me again.
"The obvious organization to brand face masks would be drug companies anxious to sell the very medicines that could save you," you wrote.
You might have added, "to save you from the di-seases they marketed, promoted, and possibly even manufactured, or at least, created the illusion and hysteria around to make them 'real'."
By the way, I saw "Perfect' on a double bill with "Mask" --- that was weird.
You are a fine actress, by the way.
Body Fear = Big Business.
A 100% cotton bandanna around your neck with a sprinkle of eucalyptus oil.; wash & dry (even iron if you like) it every night, reusable, sanitary, not conspicuous, THINK DIFFERENT
I think every mask should have written on it "I'm not wearing this mask because I think all of you are dirty, germ spreading animals." written on it.
Sorry, I saw someone come out of a coffee shop here in town the other day wearing a mask, and I just couldn't help thinking it. The best a mask could do in that sort of situation is to keep you from sticking your fingers in your mouth because you didn't wash them after using the public restroom. You're going to take that mask off to drink coffee anyway. 99% of the time it is utterly pointless and just makes a person take chances they shouldn't because they think they have some sort of protection. It's only useful if you're interacting with someone who is coughing and sneezing at your face.
Or " If you can read what is written on this mask you are too damn close to me."
Most people are 5th graders, no matter how you wish things were different.
Very smart. Except you better get a patent or your brilliant idea will be one of a million. My cousin was just hospitalized while waiting 5 hours on a plane that was delayed, and when she got home- her fever started excellerating, and was rushed to the hospital for pneumonia. We all need oxygen tanks. Portable oxygen tanks to fit in our purses. I bet it's the future.
LOL it was a great gag in the Mel Brooks Starwars movie parody Spaceballs. Opened up a can of clean Pierre-air. Man I even remember little kids in the 50's playing cowboys and wearing a bandana on your face as opposed to your neck meant you were one of the 'bad guys'. Maybe this will bring back other fake cowboys from the Regan era like Roy Rogers, Hopalong Cassidy or even that hispanic cowboy of yore, The Cisco Kid! Thanks for the stupid flashbacks of stupid shows folks! lol I'm still wondering what to do with all the plastic sheeting and duct tape that was supposed to save me from Sadams nuclear, chemical and biological weapons 6 years ago. Anyone want to trade for some new masks?
Yes, Jamie Lee, thank you!
Being a sustainable product producing country has it's merits. Hold that thought.
These masks should be totally "green"; biodegradable, with an organic anti viral natural neem herb coating, or some such I'm no expert ;-) on the outside, manufactured from a renewable plant resource: Hemp is more than medicinal marijuana.
The SPP/Security Prosperity Partnership and Donald Rumsfield and buddies are wealthier than ever today and we all look like idiots.
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We didn't and don't elect them they are chosen from a select corporate few, yet our lives are continually guided by them.
I only hope we can trust our government and news agencies to give us accurate assessments.
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I'd rather trust my common sense - or in what's left of it after the nth-scare - and im my tinfoil hat. I recently even acquired stocks of companies producing such.
As to the mask-space rented out: It's the same as with the lipstick on the pig it that doesn't change the fact that it is still a pig, a mask does not a carneval make.
Thank you and don't let anyone else use that keyboard of yours - the germs! You understand?
I think we should all have some common sense and realize once and for all that our favorite news channels aren't so much concerned with giving us accurate, rational reporting as they are with keeping us tuned in. How many have died in this country from H1N1 killer, pandemic virus? One toddler they brought from Mexico for treatment? I'm thinking more have died from slipping in the shower in the time it's taken me to write this. But 24 hour flu coverage on mainstream cable news channels will have us believe this is Captain Tripps from 'The Stand' and that we should all pull our hair out in a panic and go loot stuff. I'm here to tell you that you can stop building that underground shelter, stocking up on gasmasks and killing all the pigs, so that many years from now when you die from something totally unrelated to this flu at least you can say you weren't a crazy person.
The O-HI-O line made me lol, Jamie Lee Curtis rules!
Hyping the news is the key, they think, to get people to listen, pay attention, & yes...to keep you tuned to their station. In this kind of situation, though. information can save millions of people from getting seriously ill, & can reduce deaths.It IS causing people & govts.to take precautions, thereby somewhat reducing the exponential spread of this pandemic.
Before the 24 hr news cycle, between 20 & 100 million died of flu during the 1918 to 1920 pandemic, as few were as aware, or knew how to take precautions. There were a few newspapers then & radio - but many across the world were still unaware. The medical community knew much less then about the nature of a virus, or about prevention methods.
Still, I'd like updates to be a brief spot - per 1/2 hr - then get to other news. Remember, we're not all watching news at the same time anymore, so they have to repeat important news.
Even before this, it seems like the same 3 or 4 stories get repeated over & over - no matter how many stations we have. We'll have more of this type of news to look forward to, when we lose our newspapers. Many news services save $$$ by just taking top stories off the news wires - like AP - so who needs reporters in the field, & intellectual journalist
"Just be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for."
A Will Rogers quote
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