Maybe it was another gray winter day. Maybe it was a post-holiday emotional hangover. Maybe it was long days and too little sleep. Whatever it was, it was that one too many drop into an already-full cup that sent it spilling over. I slipped into a dark, sad, and depressed place.
My usual cheery countenance was but a fantasy. I could no more snap myself out of it than I could run a marathon. Actually, all I wanted to do was crawl back in bed, pull the covers over my head and wake up when whatever this was had passed. However, my dog beat me to it:
So, with that option unavailable, and the realization that yes, I did need to go to work, I thought "WWJS"? Meaning, "What would Janet say?" I seemed to recall that I had doled out my share of advice over the years on how to pick yourself up in these situations. And though I hardly believed myself at this point (I was seriously into doubting everything...), I had very little else to try and absolutely nothing to lose. So I started one by one to pick up the tools that had been laid at my feet over the years.
- Meditation: My mind was racing on a hamster wheel of doom and gloom. I knew that I needed to at least get it to slow down, if not stop altogether. I sat quietly for as long as I could. It helped a little.
I progressed through my day, and little by little I started to feel better. By the time my head hit the pillow, I could even be grateful for a couple of important conversations I had had. And, with a huge sense of relief and gratitude, I awoke the next day feeling back to my old self.
What I had experienced was called "life." It is not all rosy all the time. Sometimes we get a splinter in our soul. Something is there that doesn't belong and until we get it out -- all of it out -- it is painful. Left unattended, something that starts out small can fester and grow and cause much bigger issues. Once again, I have learned that it is so much better to get it out in the moment.
Sometimes one of these tools is all I need. Sometimes, like this one, I needed the whole kit. I am sure there will be more that I will pick up along the way that will be helpful down the path.
I know I will continue to learn these kinds of lessons on my journey. I will continue to be grateful for the tools I have to help me when I forget who I am and where I am supposed to be. And through it all, I will continue to walk confidently on my path, knowing that even though I may stumble or fall, I have people to help pick me back up and to be a light in my darkness. Amen to that. Here's to a sliver-free life!
For more by Janet M. Neal, click here.
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