In Search of the Authentic Self

What does it mean to be your authentic self?
During their much-touted interview on Monday night, Oprah told Piers Morgan that being her authentic self was and is key to her success. But what does it mean to be your authentic self?

Dr. Phil defines authentic self as, "the you that can be found at your absolute core. It is the part of you that is not defined by your job, your function or role."

Human beings speak in metaphors, and while I understand that having a "core" is a metaphor and/or a mythical place that we imagine lives within, I still would be grateful if Dr. Phil, Oprah and/or any one of the "healers" true and/or self-proclaimed (authentic or fictional), can tell me where my authentic self and its absolute core live.

If it is at the heart of what matters, then does it lie within my heart? Does it beat? Pulsate? Have a life of its own? Is my core behind my liver or perhaps under my pancreas? If someone is rotten to the core, can they request a core transplant?

And if you are at times not your true self; not your authentic self, then who are you?

Dr. Phil makes the distinction between "authentic" and "fictional" selves. He describes the fictional self... "When you're not living faithfully to your authentic self, you find yourself feeling incomplete, as if there is a hole in your soul."

Another set of questions come hurling forward from what I suspect is my authentic self, although I can't be sure.

The questions: Where is my soul? How do I repair its hole? And... Does your authentic self call upon your fictional self, at times, to surface? You know, maybe your fictional self is needed at a meeting; maybe your fictional self is a better negotiator than your authentic self. Therefore, your fictional self is at times your authentic self and visa-versa.

You see, it's rather tricky, isn't it? Even when you are striving to be something that you are not, how do you know that you are not that -- and perhaps you need to stretch yourself to become that?

What about multiple selves? Each of us has the capacity to be generous and selfish, loving and hateful, inclusive and magnanimous as well as petty and small. Which part of ourselves live at our core?

Is this where free will comes into play? Do we each have the ability to choose what aspects of our character we'd like to develop?

From the psychoanalytic perspective there are differing opinions. Some theoreticians concur with Dr. Phil. They believe there is a core, authentic self. Other analysts believe that we are composed of a multiplicity of self that emerge in different situations.

Despite the different perspectives, aren't we all seeking peace, harmony, love and satisfaction in whatever way we arrive at it?

Perhaps, dear reader, you can journey inward and see what answer resonates for you.

Janice Taylor
wise * fun * utterly useful

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Comments

[eric14]

04:27 PM on 01/19/2011

How does the authentic self develop? Can it change? How?

That was a thought-provoking piece.

[reggieChee-a-tow]

11:15 AM on 01/19/2011

So many questions.the most thought provoking however is how do you know if some one is displaying his authentic self or his false self?This will add so much more complexity in our daily lives trying to figure out if the person across from us is a phony or genuine that we will have little time to do anything else.Can you see where this will get us?We will become a very cynical people,taking in every thing with the proverbial grain of salt.Talk about mistrust and the absent of genuine relationship=they will proliferate aplenty.

[TaiJi2]

12:19 PM on 01/19/2011

I think the answer might be that it takes one to know one.

Expressing and developing your "authentic" self is a journey of self-awareness and awakening. Only after pursuing that path for a good time will one recognize fellow travelers and distinguish them from mere bystanders.

[CoachGayle]

11:14 AM on 01/19/2011

Dear Janice, spoken like the good cognitive social psychologist that you are....You are one, yes? Well...anyway, if you can't find that core self, there are some available on eBay. While waiting for mine to arrive, I tried lovingkindness and mindfulness meditation and found it fit pretty well into the space. Best wishes for a year of compassion and mindfulness (or even curiosity)....which might be standard features on most core models....at least that's what the gurus say. Best, Gayle

[Bob Ellal]

10:16 AM on 01/19/2011

Hey Janice, I've found that life is a game of attrition: gradually cutting out attachments and things that confuse the self. Of course, that's an outward process and is a good alpha point. Meditation works from the inside out to shuck off attachments on a deeper level. It's a process. Lately I've been removing sarcasm--a major step!

I agree about the "metaphors" used by the self-help gurus; people nod their heads in agreement without really knowing what these terms and allusions mean. One wonders if the gurus do, either. Voltaire, one of the canniest men ever to walk the earth, said in the 18th century: "When he to whom one speaks does not understand, and when he himself who speaks does not understand, that is metaphysics." Better meditate--that smacks of sarcasm!

[judykrings]

09:29 AM on 01/19/2011

As usual, Janice tells it like it is! Get to the corn in your little toe. We all have multiple versions of ourselves. Our core to me is when we are aware of what/who we are when we are in flow. For me it would mean positivity within myself. That I would know I was in a fantastic place. Like the other day when I was watching the whales so gracefully glide in and out of the ocean, their tales like the grand ending to an incredible opera. A time when out values were set on our goodness alert. We could just BE knowing we were way more than enough. When we have peace with the world and who we are in it. Hopefully doing the best we can, curiously savoring with gratitude front and center. Being kind to others as well as ourself. Not easy most of the time for me nor probably most of us. But being fallible gives us the opportunity to learn. I think we all ARE fun multiple personalities and thank God Janet Taylor's wit helps me get wise! Great post.