01/28/2009 02:25 pm ET | Updated May 25, 2011

The Woody Allen Effect

Everyone's talking about the Bradley Effect (or at least everyone looking to preemptively explain The Diebold Effect)...

But what about the Woody Allen Effect, a.k.a., the Inadequacy Factor?

Let's face it, it's been easy being a schmuck the last 8 years, because no matter what I did, I could confidently tell myself I was a better person than the President.

But Obama is clearly a better man than I--reasoned, thoughtful, accomplished--and that makes me...uncomfortable. (McCain and Palin...not so much).

Sure, President Obama might motivate me to become a better citizen, reassess my life's goals, reevaluate my methods, and improve the world 
for the benefit of everyone...but I'd rather just keep selfishly underachieving without having an elected mirror reflect my inadequacies.

I'm sure a lot of other real Americans feel the same way.

Keep Sucking America. Country Worst.