Environmentalist Etiquette: 4 Tips for How Not to be a Buzzkill at Your Next Cocktail Party
Recently, I walked into my
friends' house for a drinks-and-barbecue get-together, and before
I could even hug the hostess hello, she greeted me with an apology.
"I'm so sorry I didn't
have time to go to Whole Foods to buy organic meat. I hope regular hamburgers
and hot dogs are OK."
It's become a familiar refrain
since I've become known among my friends and family as the go-to resource
for all things environmental--my mom confessing to throwing out old
condiment jars instead of rinsing and recycling them, another friend
begging pardon for still buying water in plastic bottles--and I assured
the hostess that despite my passion for everything green, I was not
keeping tally of her household's environmental missteps.
OK, maybe I was, secretly.
But there's a fine line between engagement and annoyance, and I've
found that by sticking to the following code of etiquette, I've been
successful in sparking people's interest in environmental issues without
driving them nuts.
1. Recognize that none of us is perfect.
You've switched to CFLs,
you only buy organic, and you just constructed a compost bin on the
balcony of your eco loft--but unless you live far from the reaches
of modern society in a thatched hut where you grow your own food (and
if you do, good for you, though you're probably not reading this article),
there's probably some room for eco improvement. Maybe you're vegan
and you've also swapped your car for a bicycle, but consider that
your furry friend (the one you rescued from the pound) is contributing
to the more than 10
million tons of waterway-polluting pet waste that's generated in the
US each year. Or
perhaps you ferry your three children around the suburbs in the family
Prius and only use phthalate-free cosmetics, but guess what? Your carbon
footprint is probably a lot larger than that of your single friend who
lives in the city and uses public transportation, yet washes her hair
with Pantene.
2. Know your audience.
There's a lot of doom and
gloom out there--fish disappearing from our oceans, melting ice caps,
the emergence of global influenza pandemics--and I'm all for serious
conversation and debate if the occasion warrants it. But it's important
to know your audience; your nephew's first birthday party is probably
not the occasion to be prattling on about environmental toxins and rising
autism rates. This tenet extends to mass emailing as well: You may think
everyone wants to read your daily updates about the survival of the
Patagonian toothfish, but if you keep bombarding people with unsolicited
information, they'll just stop listening.
3. Lead by example.
"Be the change you want to
see in the world," said Gandhi, and this universal truth has become
my mantra as an environmentalist. No one likes being lectured to; the
best way to inspire change is by serving as a model for others. The
Obamas, for example, have led the way for eating locally grown, fresh
foods by planting the first White House vegetable garden since Eleanor
Roosevelt's World War II victory garden. And it helps if you set an
example with style: I'm always approached about where to purchase
the Sigg I started using a few months back.
4. Most importantly, make green fun.
Some people may be inspired to change their ways by hearing tales of rising sea levels and worldwide drought, but I've found that all but the most ardent environmentalist will adopt a "screw it, we're all screwed" mentality unless adopting environmental changes seems doable, and even more importantly, fun. Tired of your girlfriends' wasteful shopping habits? Show them how much fun thrift shopping can be by taking them with you to the local flea market. Want to inspire your friends to adopt Meatless Monday? Cook up a big pot of veggie chili and a pile of cornbread and invite them over for Meatless Monday Night Football. (Just don't forget to stock the fridge with plenty of meat-free beer!)
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This is amazing!!! Love the shout out to the flea market shopping - COMPLETELY agree! Can't wait to read more posts!! xoxoxox:)
Fine piece of writing, and thought-provoking as well.
Great blog! I'm just learning to go green and it's not as hard as it seems, especially with your advice. Thanks for the easy tips! :)
I totally agree that anytime you want to help facilitate change, you need to show the way it can be fun and easy. And no judging or stress.
Nice job Jennifer! Little by little positive greenies like you will help change the world for the better!
Looking forward to more posts!
Great article and well done! Thanks for doing this article!
Spencer Brown
founder of rentagreen
Can't wait for the next post!
what a great post! and just in time for the 4th of july weekend! vegetable chili! with a PILE of cornbread?! :) sounds great!
I love the meatless mondays!!! Its such an easy way to make a difference. Great blog entry Jennifer! I always enjoy your blog as well.
Good article, preachy people can be annoying no matter what they're preaching.
That said, why in the world would an eco-warrior type not be burying their dog's waste rather than allowing it to pollute the waters?
I have a regular compost heap, and then I have an area of the yard where I bury the poo, rather than sticking it in plastic bags to go to a landfill. I understand that in concrete jungle type of environment that this isn't possible, but for the majority of people it is.
See Jennifer Grayson's Profile
Burying is an alternative in rural and suburban communities, but there are a few stipulations, since pathogens like E. coli can survive for months in fecal waste:
http://www
I love point #3. I never ask my friends at dinner parties to accommodate my vegetarianism unless they ask beforehand. I can always find bread, salad and save room for dessert!
Well stated. Made me laugh and think at the same time. Preaching doesn't work and people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
I love lists and this is a good one for reminding us all to strike that very tenuous balance between being passionate and annoying. I know plenty of people (myself included) who tend to lecture when riled up about a subject. So while I do believe that people respond to passion and energy, I am taking your etiquette lessons to heart and vowing to be concise and conscientious about my message.
#5: have all guests read Ms. Grayson's blog on how to be a good 'green' party-goer.
Very awesome tips, something more people should adhere to - like you said, no one wants to be lectured to! (Patagonian toothfish, btw, is so delicious, though... sigh)
I didn't realize our pets were an issue! Are there any alternatives to the damage they impart on the environment or is it just something we have to accept as part of not being perfect, for us to continue to have our furry loveable companions?
See Jennifer Grayson's Profile
Well, unfortunately, there are no easy solutions when it comes to pets and the environment. Of course, I would never suggest you should kick Fluffy to the curb. (One could argue that pets can be eco-friendly: Cats are a natural way to control pests, and the proven health benefits of having a pet could even help curb people's reliance on prescription medication
The most pressing question is what to do with all that waste. Even biodegradable poop bags will not decompose if sent to a closed landfill. And composting for pet waste isn't yet widely offered by most city sanitation departments.
The link I posted in the article above, http://www
Awesome, thanks again Jennifer. It looks like my doggie is already fairly green, just a few more items I can take to really lower her carbon footprint.
So true! Thank you for the etiquette tips. Even though, I must say, being greeted to a barbecue with those words would be the ultimate buzz kill for me, especially after having seen Kenner's "Food Inc" last week. But not worth to be the party-pooper after the damage has been done, right?
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