Let's just start by saying that I think Cindy Crawford is a beautiful woman whose nude shots in Allure magazine are more than alluring. Yes, they do affirm that a firm body is feasible for some of us forty-plus types and that is fabulous. But what I'm lathered up about -- obviously more than her -- is that I can't help thinking that maybe her 9-year-old son Presley won't think these shots are as fabulous.
I only say this because I have a young son at home and this year he is of the age where even the slightest slip of a nightgown causes embarrassment and shrieks of "Mom, cover up." Unlike his father, who can walk around the house naked with impunity, I no longer can get dressed with our bedroom door open as I have for years or shower without giving my son advance warning before he wanders into our room. And lately he'll protest if I happen to walk into his room while he's changing, though as I remind him, I've seen him undressed from the time he came out of me.
But his reactions are also very normal . We live in New England not California or Europe. And each environment has its own cultural norms.
A few years ago I asked my colleague, Dr. Ava Siegler, at what point can I no longer be naked in front of my son since coming from a European family, I'm pretty relaxed about it at home. And many of my friends said that they were very modest in front of children. Her wise advice after 30 years of practice was, "he'll let you know." And this year he has.
Which brings me back to thinking about Presley Gerber, Crawford's son as well as her daughter Kaia. I asked my baseball loving, football throwing, tennis fanatic son what he thought of a Mom posing naked to show that beauty is possible at all ages.
"If I was her son, it would embarrass me and make me feel my Mom doesn't care about anything," he said. "She's nude to people that she doesn't even know. Isn't that cheating on his Dad?"
When I pointed out that the human body is nothing to be ashamed of, he reminded me of how I had told him that "private parts are supposed to be seen only privately."
Oops, I did say that.
I didn't bother saying that I'm sure that Crawford's husband Rande Gerber is getting countless high fives that his wife is hotter than a lava pouring volcano and that everyone else most likely sees nothing wrong with it. But who really matters?
My son then added another point worth mentioning. "Didn't she think of how embarrassing it will be when her son's friends see his Mom nude on YouTube, because you know they will," he said. "People will make fun of him and say, "Ooh, I saw your Mom on my Facebook page and that's just not right."
I'm having trouble with this one and hope you out there can help me. On one side, I did feel for Crawford's son when I saw the picture and then I thought of how totally appropriate Kate Winslet's nude scenes were in The Reader and how I didn't flinch or think of what her son -- Joe is five years old -- would think. Furthermore, does this make me a prude, something I don't think I am.
I'm trying to figure this out. Trust me, this is not jealousy over Crawford's fab bod since I am part of the cougar contingent. At last, for the first time in history, thanks to exercise, nutrition and science, women look so good that it's hard to decipher whether they are in their 30s, 40s, or 50s. And we still have the wisdom from experience unlike our younger counterparts, which makes us more alluring, smart, confident, fun and comfortable with our bodies. However, I'm sexy because it makes me feel good and as a result my husband benefits too. But call me old-fashioned, I still think there has to be boundaries since I am also the mother to three children. Maybe in fairness, since I am not an actress or model, I'm not looking at it as an expression of art; I'm just thinking of the expression on my son's face if I posed naked. And I'm not doubting that Crawford isn't a loving parent.
Basically what I think I'm saying is that I don't want to be a MILF if it ever hurts or embarrasses my son. I'd rather be a MILK -- someone his friends say is a Mom I'd Like To Know.