11/01/2008 05:12 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Palin Excuses

The McCain Campaign is scrambling for any possible excuse to keep VP candidate Sarah Palin far away from Thursday's debate in St Louis lest she give a repeat performance of her interview with Katie Couric. With the Wall Street crisis apparently solidly under control due to Senator McCain's yeoman-like work, here are some of the ploys alleged to have been discussed.

1) Home pregnancy test showed up blue and a sonogram is scheduled for Thursday.

2) Weather forecast for Thursday says clear in Wasilla. This is the Governor's day to watch the skies for signs of Vladimir Putin flying a new MIG-35 in violation of US airspace.

3) Polar Bear hunting season begins Thursday. It's a state Holiday and the Governor is expected to get off the ceremonial first shot while hanging from a Cessna at 500 ft.

4) Alaskan Pipeline has sprung a leak and Governor must race to the source of spill with duct tape and moose glue. Husband Todd will drive her to site in his championship snow mobile.

5) Special needs baby requires special care on this special day, especially on this special day. Special mother must attend to special needs in her own special way. You did know she has a special needs child, didn't you?

6) The soon-to-be husband of the Governor's 17 year old daughter (and failed abstinence-only adherent) insists on an extra $500,000 to follow through with the whole marriage charade threatening to release a sex tape if his demands are not met.

7) Totally forgot that Thursday is 'Take a Canadian to Lunch Day".

8) Can't make it because she's volunteering in Habitat for Humanities new project helping all those who have lost homes in coastal encroachment build new abodes 500 miles inland.

9) Emergency Root Canal.

10) Lost her Visa for entering the lower 48.