I was asked to write a song about Thanksgiving. Not an easy task. It's not the most exciting holiday. It doesn't inspire like Halloween or Hanukkah.
I could write about the Pilgrims and the Indians, and how they really were buddy buddy for one big dinner that included canned yams with melted mini-marshmallows on top. And, how afterwards, the Pilgrims took their land.
Or how Thanksgiving used to initiate the beginning of the Christmas season. It was not until Santa finally arrived at the Macy's Day Parade that you would be allowed to put up a tree or annoy everyone with your favorite Christmas mix tape. But now Starbucks has been hawking Xmas CDs for months.
I could write about how, during my eating disorder phase in the '80s, how much dread I had staring at the big table adorned with a dinosaur-sized turkey and hundreds of side dishes, including the historical canned yams with melted mini-marshmallows.
Or how, despite having more discerning taste buds, I still prefer my cranberry sauce in a can.
What was suggested to me was the presidential pardon. Every year -- and I don't know how far back this tradition began -- the president pardons one turkey. I could write how Bush has used his powers to free seven turkeys and...Scooter Libby. There's got to be a song in that. Clinton, by the way, freed more than a dozen drug offenders unjustly sentenced by mandatory minimums.
Along the way to writing the song, I got stuck and my great friend and co-provocateur Michelle Lewis jumped in.
This is from Michelle:
I was home with my baby today and thought it might to fun to go ahead and write the aforementioned presidential-turkey-pardoning song. At least, it kept the baby amused (yeah, that's him coughing in the background). Anyway, we made it a real family operation -- my husband Dan played guitar, while I sang with Jackson on my lap.
I've printed the lyrics below so you can sing along.
Happy Thanksgiving!
"One Turkey"
Ever since Harry Truman,
Compassion arrives
For one lucky bird
Who is promised not to die.
Kennedy had done it, so had LBJ,
And again this November, George W will save...One Turkey
One Turkey
This jerky will pardon one turkey - hooray!
One turkey
One turkey
Will still have a neck at the end of Thanksgiving DayDon't know much about turkeys
But one thing is sure
They can't raise our taxes
Or send kids to war
They don't reward cronies
Or muck up our air
So somehow this pardoning doesn't seem fairOne Turkey
One Turkey
This jerky will pardon one turkey - hooray!
One turkey
One turkey
Will still have a neck at the end of Thanksgiving Day
The White House great lawn
Out on this Thursday morning
Their erstwhile dinner detects irony
Our one little turkey looks up at the prez
And he says,
"Wait, you're pardoning me???"One Turkey, etc.
Bush-Cheney created a DEREGULATED ROGUE ECONOMY and IRAQ INVASION for the benefit of irresponsible, greedy profiteers, including themselves via their multinational investments!
Count on Bush-Cheney to invent every possible MISSION IMPOSSIBLE and then call it MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. Unfortunately, ADVERTISING is NOT everything. Advertising is NOT REALITY.
Advertising is LYING. Remember that when you vote!
The grim reality is: we're living in a NANNY STATE FOR THE RICH and Bush-Cheney corporate welfare queens, Big Oil, war PROFITEERS grabbing all our money and tax dollars.
Middle America's economy is being destroyed for the sake of mega-profits for deregulated, unaccountable "corporate welfare queens" .
A turkey sat on a backyard fence
And he sang this sad, sad tu-u-u-ne
"Thanksgiving Day is coming
Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble
And I'm going to be eaten soon."
"Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble
How I'd like to run aw-a-a-ay
Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble gobble, gobble
I don't like Thanksgiving Day."
(Sorry I can't include the music
I just saw Pink has a song titled "Dear Mr. President", check it out on VH1.
Fall In Love with Michelle Lewis' cute
baby's background vocals. Thank you for a warm laugh, ladies!
i used to pack turkeys for cargill. by the time they got to me, the carcass was in a bag, and i had to straighten the bag and cryovac the air out of the bag and seal it. it made my hands and arms very sore and eventually very strong. my wish for the turkey workers is that they too become vegetarians and find better work.
as for lewis libby, may he rot in hell along with his co-conspirators--all five of them (bush, cheney, card, rove, and libby)