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Jim Watkins

Jim Watkins

Posted: July 28, 2009 06:53 PM

Don't Give Up, Birthers!


It appears the movement to convince people that President Obama was born overseas is petering out. There's more conclusive evidence this week--and there was never a shortage of it--that he was, in fact, born in the good old U.S. of A.. Once again, officials in Hawaii have confirmed the legitimacy of his birth certificate, and even Ann Coulter is finding the effort by the so-called birthers to be ridiculous and embarrassing. Let's face it, when Ann Coulter thinks your movement is too extreme, it's time to fold up the street corner card table and go home.

But creative Obama opponents should certainly be able to come up with other crackpot ideas about why he's not the legitimate POTUS. To save them some time, here are some suggestions:

--- According to now-established precedent, a President can't take office until the U.S. Supreme Court says so.

--- He once shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

--- His fingers on top of the Bible during swearing in were clearly crossed.

--- Name spelled backwards is "amabo," which is Latin for "I shall love." So he must be from Latin America.

--- Angela Lansbury brainwashed him.

--- Once while marching in honor guard as a young Boy Scout accidentally allowed American flag to touch the ground.

--- Birthers now focusing not on where Obama was born, but on when. And so far all evidence indicates he's only 19.

--- At the conclusion of oath of office, actually said "So help me, dawg!"