2011 is a tough year, with palpable stress and fear in the air; recovery expectations dashed; bad news, night after night; and human suffering reaching new depths in Japan and the Middle East. All of this is occurring in an environment of chaos and ever-increasing distractions. New challenges, problems and tasks being added daily to lists already impossibly long.
It may be shocking to read words like these coming from Mrs. Best Year Yet, but these realities have affected all of us, including me. And sometimes it felt like it has affected me especially. Here I am, working in the business 24/7, way past retirement age, and the stress of years of working this hard finally erupted this year in scary pain and health issues -- for both Tim and me. We have had our home on the market for two and a half years, having long since said goodbye to that nest egg strategy, while we've struggled through months of low sales, waiting for our new Best Year Yet online software to take off. Will we ever be able to stop?
I don't ever remember having a fear that took the breath out of me and sometimes brought clutching chest pains. Then last November I broke my foot, leaving the emergency room on crutches!
In the midst of all this, I couldn't find my way, and nothing seemed to work. I
was lost in the pit of self-pity and didn't even know it. I've always believed in miracles, but the well was dry.
Then one day I overheard my lifelong friend Sally talking about a conversation she'd recently had with friends. Someone had asked the question, "What's the source of miracles?" A deep discussion followed and they reached a profound conclusion. The source of miracles is gratitude.
The light came on. That's the truth, and I've always known it. But knowing something is one thing, and living it is another.
Yes, I'd been expressing gratitude daily in my meditation, and I'd been feeling glimpses of connection with my true self. But too often I climbed back on the pity pot as soon as
I returned to my day.
But hearing her words, I began to see that gratitude means far more than saying thanks and counting my blessings from time to time. I've done my best at acknowledging people for what they do and who they are because I know that most of us feel unappreciated and unrecognized for how much we give at work and at home. We hate that part of ourselves, but it's there, isn't it.
So if merely being thankful isn't enough, what is? Slowly, I began to see that what's required is living in gratitude. But here's the rub: It's not enough to be grateful if I do so in pursuit of the miracles I hope will come as a result.
The secret is authentic and heart-felt gratitude for what I have, living in appreciation of the blessings that already are, not wanting more, and living in abundance now. Not expressing appreciation and gratitude for blessings because of the benefits of doing so. The truth is that there is so much for me to be grateful for now. And that truth overpowers everything that's happening now in each of our lives.
If you've read my book,"Your Best Year Yet!" you may remember that Tim and I go out for dinner every Friday and spend the meal taking turns toasting miracles that have happened in the past week. We've often said that our Friday Night Miracles habit is the source of our sanity and the incredible results we've achieved in our 32 years together. But even those moments of gratitude had not been spilling over into the rest of the week.
Since the light came on when I heard my friend's story, its glow has been becoming brighter every day. My thinking is focused on gratitude, and my ability to let go of fear, judgment, worry and resentment is getting stronger every day. I wake up faster and faster and let go more and more quickly of thoughts and assumptions that take me back into the dark, black hole where everything is awful and things are hopeless. Finally and incredibly, I have come to a place where it really doesn't matter if things don't change. I am so, so lucky!
And, believe it or not, when I was halfway through writing this article and had just finished writing the words, "The source of miracles is gratitude," Tim came to me and asked if he could interrupt me for a minute. He said, "If you'll sign this document, the sale of our home is firm, and we're closing a week from Tuesday".
If it has taken these difficult times to force us to remember to be grateful for what we have and who we are, above all and every day. Every painful and fearful minute has been more than worth it.
Is it possible to dissolve fear? Yes. Please try it. Fear and gratitude can't co-exist.
Follow Jinny Ditzler on Twitter: www.twitter.com/Jinny_S_Ditzler
Harvey J. Kaye: Maine Governor Paul LePage Reveals the Fears of the Right
Bill Mann: Cable, Broadcast TV Cynics Fearlessly Mine Public Fears
Deborah King: Is Radiation Panic Contaminating Your Life? 5 Ways to Detox from the Fear
Gratitude - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Gratitude | Define Gratitude at Dictionary.com
Why Living a Life of Gratitude Can Make You Happy | zen habits
We take so many things for granted, we shouldn't . Some people cannot even breathe on their own,
so, if we start with the basics, breathing, walking, carrying our body, the list is endless.
However, we don't have to stop at gratitude, let's say that gratitude is a wonderful good habit,
that will allow us to do what sunflowers do, throughout the day they turn towards the sun, sometimes more than 2, three times.
There is clarity, sun, love, good things in the world as well.
Keith Johnson has a free "The Art of turning Dreams into Realty" eBook and a one hour seminar download. Free Confidence Building Resources Click this link to visit now http://keithjohnson.tv
First of all, sorry for being slow to respond -- blame it on our new granddaughter who arrived 3 weeks early. ( : I love your conscious and useful definition of unconditional LOVE. Once I heard a teacher say that 'love and relationships are not fires we can warm ourselves by, but opportunities to stoke the fire'. Thanks!
As I recall, a result was to be more attuned to the presence of gratitude.
I think you made a good point about having an awareness of a grateful ideal is not as enlivening as walking the walk.
I've been taught that gratitude needs to be imbued as an emotional presence. Once it makes it to that home it is no longer subjected to the whims of projecting or remorse.
It is only possible to think about the past or the future. Emotions are now, as are observations, but as soon as we think, we aren’t here now.
Why not? One can be grateful for what one has and very fearful of losing it, or of things outside one's control.
Sorry to be slow in responding -- a new member of our family arrived early, and (pleasantly) slowed me down for awhile. I fully understand your objection and the fact that you can't substantiate what I've said. If you really want to know more, I can point you to the scientific basis. However, I suggest a faster and more rewarding path to doing so -- simply try being more grateful yourself and see what happens. I hope you're surprised!
There is homeless guy who hangs out in front of the grocery store that I go to, that I always give money to. He's probably the most grateful and kind hearted man I've run across, yet I don't see his situation getting better.
He's both physically and mentally disabled and has been standing in the same spot, asking people for money, for years.
I've also know plenty of people who were as grateful for all of the good things in their lives, who had terrible things happen to them, that were not of their making. And what about the not-so grateful who reap incredible benefits and rewards, regardless of what kind of person they are?
Everything you say is true -- everyone has had hard times, no matter what they do to practice what they know works. Your homeless friend is probably doing a better job than all of us, given what his life is like. But that's the point I was trying to make in my article: when we are truly grateful for what life has given us, we don't need things to change. Thank you for telling me about this man -- he is an inspiration to me.
Unless anecdotes touch us deeply -- they can be meaningless. However, when they are our own, they become reality. May your days be filled with gratitude. Thanks, Terri.
http://www.heathbrothers.com/switch/
You have instincts for a good reason. They are useful.
Lately I have been experiencing simple pleasures in a new way. The disaster's in the world around me made me ever more thankful that I had a roof over my head, food on the table and enough to pay my bills. I have never had an overflow of cash, and yet I have been gifted so many times with amazing gifts. I also tythe ten percent of my income to charity which makes me feel very abundant all-ways.
True wealth is a state of mind = ABUNDANCE
So true.
And gratitude is very important. Every day I think of something I'm grateful for just to give me something positive to think about. It really helps to ground me.
The beggar is not necessarily a failure but may be a successful master at manifesting his experience.
Everything is a gift of inestimable value. Love it all, saying yes to this and yes to that without judgement; with acceptance, and let unwanteds pass by. Shift attention to wanted, emote in connection with it and a whole new batch of yesses appear.
The trick seems to be in acceptance of what is, clarity of what is preferred and creating the feeling of having/experiencing it without attachment to outcome.
A persistent feeling of wanting perpetuates more wanting, not having.
The feeling of having perpetuates more having. Gratitude is a feeling of having, with appreciation, which is love.
It's not so much magic as science. ; )
Regarding your last comment, I've always been more of a 'magic' person' than a scientist, but want to pass on the name of a book my husband gave me for Christmas. It's called 'Thanks - how the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier' - http://tinyurl.com/495ach3
Maybe gratitude is a bit of both!