Unplug and Recharge: When Burnout Fries Your Motivation

Life really does have an uncanny way of imitating art.

It was Labor Day of 2010. I'd just finished penning the final revisions to my latest book "Fried: Why You Burn Out and How to Revive." My husband Gordon and I returned from an early-morning hike and spotted smoke in the gulch below the house. Within minutes there were flames. Hastily packing what we could, we loaded the dogs into our cars and prepared to flee.

A hundred-foot wall of flames raced up the gulch as we said goodbye to our home. The roar of the conflagration was terrifying as we witnessed the worst wildfire in Colorado history. It burned for almost a week and incinerated 169 homes and more than 7,500 acres of pristine beauty.

"Fried" was suddenly more than a book title. Five days into the evacuation we were told that our home had, against all odds, survived. Twelve neighboring homes were reduced to ash. The once-magnificent view had been replaced by a charred, lunar landscape. Clouds of soot and toxic dust settled over everything inside and out.

Staying on top of the insurance claim, hiring and overseeing contractors to clean and repair the house, canceling checking accounts and credit cards that might have been compromised -- all the while traveling, working and living in a hotel -- started to burn me out.

Berkeley psychologist Christina Maslach created a scale that measures the three basic components of the syndrome: emotional exhaustion and physical depletion; loss of empathy; and decrease in self-confidence and competence. Burnout starts innocently enough with working harder but slowly and surely culminates in physical and mental collapse.

As work expands and threatens to eat life whole, values get turned upside down. Exercise, play and time with loved ones may get short shrift. The result is snarkiness and impatience, a tendency to feel edgy and judgmental -- a closing of the heart. In an attempt to feel better you might overeat, drink to excess, turn to prescription or illicit drugs, get lost in porn or find yourself staring mindlessly at the television. It's like a film of plastic wrap has been stretched over the world, and you can't connect with life.

Motivation gets replaced by a "why bother?" attitude. Headaches, trouble sleeping, stomach problems, muscle aches, high blood pressure and the whole panoply of stress-related ills increase. The end result looks a lot like depression. The cure is not in a pill but in making choices that allow you to make a living while having a life.

Tips for Revival:

1. Unplug and take stock. Go away for a few days to a quiet place where you can get some perspective. What's burning you out? Are you a square peg in a round hole? Customer service, for example, is a bad choice for the conflict-averse. Are you a caregiver who needs respite? Are you a people-pleaser who needs to say "no" to others and "yes" to yourself? Is your lifestyle so expensive that working enough to fund it is killing you?
2. Purge what's not necessary. Pareto's Law states that 20 percent of one's actions result in 80 percent of hoped-for results. Identify leverage points and energy drains. What serves you, and what wastes your time? When I cut down on radio interviews, reviewing people's manuscripts and doing favors for just about anyone who asked, I had much more time for what really matters. The fire gave me permission to say "no" without feeling guilty. But you don't need to wait for an excuse to live your own life.
3. Play both for the sake of fun itself and because play changes your brain state and supports creative thinking. Work smarter by exercising or playing when you feel stale.
4. Pay yourself first. Schedule time for self-care, family and friends before filling up your calendar with work demands. Waiting for free time to materialize is the same as deciding to save the money that's left at the end of the month.
5. Take a weekly Sabbath. Do absolutely nothing related to work on that day. This is a time-honored strategy for staying sane and enjoying life.
6. Cultivate beginner's mind. The late Zen teacher Suzuki Roshi wrote, "In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities; in the expert's mind there are few."

As a result of the fire I've had to give up expert status. After months spent grieving the destruction of the land, I'm constantly surprised by new life revealing itself. Charred trees are host to flocks of magpies and woodpeckers. Some of the browned-out trees are showing signs of life. The pleasure of seeing the landscape with fresh eyes is not in the end-product of what all the cutting, pruning and planting might create, but in the act of creativity itself.

Pay yourself first. We humans are born artists, and when burnout wipes the canvas clean, it is an invitation to pick through the ashes and make life new again.

 

Comments

[Bostontru2u]

11:03 PM on 01/21/2011

"Giving up your expert status" should have been number 7. You really can't let go and relax when you tell yourself to always be on top, in charge, the know it all, the leader, the go to person, the "Expert." Think about your health when feeling burnt out. You are the most important thing to yourself.

[Narouca]

09:00 PM on 01/19/2011

Good ideas all of them, especially #5 - “Take a weekly Sabbath. Do absolutely nothing related to work on that day”.

Required a bit of organizing and proportioning key tasks to other days of the week; but seriously, it’s all getting done and the world has not fallen apart yet!

[Bob Ellal]

10:06 AM on 01/19/2011

After my four bouts of supposedly terminal cancer in the early nineties, I was "burned out." Mainly on facing my own mortality ad nauseum. The qigong practice that helped me beat the cancer helped me in a new way: to deal with the PTSD I was experiencing. It took several years and some medication, but here I am: "piss and vinegar" levels back to normal. I'd recommend qigong to anyone traversing a disease process, or to reduce stress and regain the energy of burnout.

[merlinspinoza]

07:55 PM on 01/18/2011

http://www.globalgoodnews.com/health-news-a.html?art=129530763619617040

[robertbeal]

05:52 PM on 01/18/2011

Yes, the futurists of the '70's predicted copious creative leisure time. Alas, political-economics dictated a different course for most boomers' adult lives. Eat, sleep, and exercise well AND give time and attention to the larger predicament.

[cmm5713]

04:56 PM on 01/18/2011

The signs and symptoms of burnout are eerily similar to those of depression though the root causes may be different. The "emotional exhaustion and physical depletion; loss of empathy; and decrease in self-confidence and competence" is so debilitating. That "burnout starts innocently enough with working harder but slowly and surely culminates in physical and mental collapse" is the plight of so many. Thank you for your article which acknowledges the negative effects of working so hard and striving for perfection in our imperfect world. If we could only be as gentle with ourselves as we are with others.

[mrs adler]

04:16 PM on 01/18/2011

As a student facing her 7th final since 1st December, I feel burnt out now, psychologically tired, depressed, unmotivated and... like cr*p right now. I think that, of the above, I need to go on holidays on my own, to do nothing....

[Joan Borysenko]

04:35 PM on 01/18/2011

A holiday is just the ticket, mrs adler! One of my friends and colleagues, Wayne Muller, talks about the flow of life as music. No matter how beautiful the notes (and I'll add stressful since that's part of life, too) without rest stops it's all just noise. Time to stop, rest, and listen to the music of your life.

[Eric Gainer]

01:22 PM on 01/18/2011

Joan, these suggestions are all valuable insights. I hope you know your readers take them away and come back to them. Number 6 rings true for my life, it helps one realize that much like the fire that swept through and ravaged many homes in your town, there is always a rebirth, a spark in which we can work with from the embers of any situation. Many thanks.

[Joan Borysenko]

04:32 PM on 01/18/2011

Thanks for your kind support, Eric. It's a challenge for me to write up a short list of to-do's when revival from being Fried is what a friend of mine calls a lifelong process of becoming. Part of that becoming is learning how to pick yourself up when you've fallen down--otherwise known as resilience. When I wrote a book on resilience (It's Not the End of the World) one of the three commonalities of resilient people most written about in the literature was faith. Faith in God or in some larger principle that you could trust in. Trusting that's there's always a spark left to fan is an article of faith for me, not because I believe it in the abstract, but because it's my direct experience. I've had a lot of practice falling down and getting back up again. That's why I like to share both my personal experience and the research literature when I write.

[save time live better]

12:19 PM on 01/18/2011

Being in "go go go" mode all the time can lead to burnout quickly.Taking some time to recharge your batteries can boost your energy and give you a fresh perspective on things. In fact, it is often during our "down time" that we come up with our best ideas for solving problems or improving our lives.

Give yourself permission to schedule time for yourself. Start small: aim for half an hour a day to do exactly what you want to do (and nothing else). Use the time to indulge in an activity that brings you joy and gives your mind a rest from the day-to-day madness of your life. Treat your scheduled "me time" like any other item on your calendar. Short of a true emergency, don't let anyone or anything interfere with your commitment to yourself.

For ideas on how to recharge your batteries by making time for you, click here: http://www.save-time-live-better.com/2010/11/recharge-your-batteries-by-making-time_08.html

[save time live better]

12:17 PM on 01/18/2011

Terrific advice. The times when you are super-busy are the times when you need a little time for yourself the most. Being in "go go go" mode all the time can lead to burnout quickly.

Taking some time to recharge your batteries can boost your energy and give you a fresh perspective on things. In fact, it is often during our "down time" that we come up with our best ideas for solving problems or improving our lives.

Give yourself permission to schedule time for yourself. Start small: aim for half an hour a day to do exactly what you want to do (and nothing else). Use the time to indulge in an activity that brings you joy and gives your mind a rest from the day-to-day madness of your life. Treat your scheduled "me time" like any other item on your calendar. Short of a true emergency, don't let anyone or anything interfere with your commitment to yourself.

If you're not sure how to find a little time just for you, here are some ideas:

1. wake up half an hour earlier

2. take back your commuting time

3. use your kids' television time to unwind

4. make the most of after-dinner time

[wellbeingcity]

02:08 PM on 01/19/2011

If you are really struggling to find time for yourself, you could try beginning with just one minute at
a time and try some of these simple one minute meditation ideas: http://bit.ly/cy3AL8

[JR Jake]

12:13 PM on 01/18/2011

This story is actually a reprint from about 1-2 months ago. Why unplug, just put it in neutral? Change your day, your routines, your habits will track accordingly. It is not rocket science.

[feyangel]

11:53 AM on 01/18/2011

Good article and timely for me, as I am coming out of total and complete burn-out period, and have been wasting time judging it, thinking I "should" quickly get back to the same state and level of "doing" that caused the burn-out in the first place. What I glimpse sometimes, that this article clarified, is that what I need to do is LEARN from what happened and move on, reshaping my life in a healthier, happier way. Thank you.

[RJII]

10:28 AM on 01/18/2011

But the job keeps growing, engulfing and de stroying.