The Frozen Yogurt Wars

Ever since Seinfeld called out some frozen yogurt chains for having way more calories than they claimed, there has been a lot of confusion surrounding frozen yogurt. New chains have been popping up every day, and it can be very hard to tell which brands are actually healthy and which ones have more fat than Haagen-Dazs ice cream. Well, we love frozen yogurt and we eat so much of it that we consider ourselves fro yo connoisseurs. We know which brands are hard to swallow and which are hard to burn off. Read on so that as the days get warmer, you can indulge stress-free in a cool, satisfying treat.

#1 - Tasti D Lite

Tasti D is pretty much our favorite place on earth, but unfortunately it's only available in certain parts of the country right now. (However, more of these gems will be popping up around the country soon, so stay tuned.) This stuff is incredibly delicious, has only 20 calories per ounce for most flavors, and is all natural! That means no crazy chemicals, so you can feel good about indulging in this stuff. Plus, it comes in literally hundreds of unique flavors like fluffernutter, cake batter, mudpie, cinnamon crunch, etc. We've found that Tasti D makes a great lunch when you add healthy toppings like almonds or granola, or a perfect snack when swirled on a cone with a few sprinkles. Just be careful about licking your cone while walking down the street - a few construction guys may notice.

#2 - Pinkberry

The Pinkberry craze is sweeping the nation - so much so that there are now tons of Pinkberry knock-off chains with stupid names like Cantaloop, Diet Berry and Red Mango. This stuff is not your typical frozen yogurt. It's more like a really cold version of regular, plain yogurt. It's light and refreshing, but without toppings it tastes like that palate cleanser sorbet they give you at fancy restaurants. Make sure to always add toppings, especially because their toppings are the best thing about Pinkberry. They have the most beautiful, perfect, most likely genetically manipulated raspberries and blueberries on the planet. As far as nutrition goes, Pinkberry is kind of confusing. It tastes like real yogurt, but doesn't actually have any of those active cultures that make yogurt so healthy. However, for less than 20 calories an ounce for the "original" flavor, you can eat Pinkberry without guilt. Just remember to eat some real food during the day to balance it out.

#3 - Carbolite

This is Atkins-friendly frozen yogurt and we hate it almost as much as Dr. Atkins himself. Sure, you can eat buckets of this stuff and it'll do nothing to your waistline, since it only has about 10 calories an ounce and very few carbs. However, if your taste buds are so dead from eating other chemically, fake Atkins foods that this actually tastes good, then we feel very sorry for you. Carbolite tastes like pure chemicals and is incredibly hard to digest, if you know what we mean. Not worth it.

#4 - TCBY

This is one of the most superfluous brands around the country and it's not bad. It tastes pretty good and is a great alternative to McDonald's at all those freeway rest stops. Just remember that this stuff can pack on the calories a bit more than most of the other brands. Their frozen yogurt has up to 50 calories per ounce, which is more than Breyer's vanilla ice cream! If you love TCBY, go ahead and eat it for dessert or on the road, but if you're trying to lose weight and are eating this every night, you're not doing yourself any favors.

#5 - Colombo

This is another common brand, especially around college campuses. Colombo tastes more like ice cream than almost any other chain and has slightly fewer calories per ounce than TCBY, so this is a good option for college students who are on the run. Just be careful with all the crazy toppings they have. Adding smashed up Oreos to your frozen yogurt can be really fun, but totally cancels out the healthy factor.

For more tips, pick up a copy of HOW TO EAT LIKE A HOT CHICK: Eat What You Love, Love How You Feel, by Jodi Lipper and Cerina Vincent.

Comments

[Therm]

> "Pinkberry knock-off chains with stupid names like...Red Mango".

Actually, Red Mango predates Pink Berry by several years in Korea, Pink Berry just came to the U.S. first.

> "It tastes like real yogurt, but doesn't actually have any of those active cultures that make yogurt so healthy."

While this is true of Pink Berry, Red Mango apparently does have the active cultures.

[lacitepq]

Not sure if you are joking but I actually do have a friend who eats btwn a pint and a quart of frozen yougart a day. The sad thing is that besides coffee and diet soda that is all she eats. She has always looked anorexic to me. The final tip-off was one day she told me she needed to lose 10 lbs. Even though she is large-breasted the rest of her looks skeletal. (which I didn't have the heart to tell her does not make her look very attractive) Aneroxia is a strange disease.

[Blefuscu]

the worst part is that women like this are always super grouchy because they're hungry. when it comes to lovers, the choice between being with this woman or woman who's 5-10 lbs. heavier but relaxed and happier is a no-brainer for me. this of course assumes that the heavier woman doesn't have the typical female hangup about her weight. being 5 lbs heavier really doesn't make you that much hotter in the eyes of men, anyway. only other women notice that crap. same thing with clothes and makeup.

[Blefuscu]

whups, make that "being 5 lbs. lighter doesn't make you that much hotter"

[JScott]

I never understood this craze for Pinkberry, to me it's just average frozen yogurt and your paying for their hip designed retail establisments, they have this clever marketing campaign it seems to make it hip and cool with opinion leader/celebs and such trying to generate buzz and profits. Funny thing is I tried it and was unimpressed, like so what's the big deal.

[NetParrot]

What if, like most people, you think yogurt that's flavored to taste like richer desserts is less "yogurt" than it is a way for women who are neurotic about their weight to attempt to indulge themselves without loathing themselves afterwards?

[Blefuscu]

"it can be very hard to tell which brands are actually healthy and which ones have more fat than Haagen-Dazs ice cream."

um... since when is eating fat unhealthy?

this is all just factory food. best to eat actual yogurt and avoid this crap altogether. better yet -- make your own. unprocessed food is cheaper and will keep you from getting fat. all this calorie talk... counting calories is a losing proposition for long-term permanent weight loss anyway. if you are trying to become an anorexic supermodel i suppose it might help, but if you need to use arithmetic to keep from being obese, something is severely wrong.

americans' DNA has not changed in the past 30 years, but we have become lard-asses. noone knows why, but i can almost guarantee you that the solution is not "healthy" processed food.

[Idytme]

I have always been weight conscious but I have been very hypoglycemic (sugar sensitive) since my teenage years. When frozen yogurt came out as the next best thing in frozen deserts, I always used to eat it. The problem was that it would make me feel even worse eating it than eating ice cream, by far.
Forget the fat, most frozen yogurts are chalk full of sugar, and it is the high sugar content that makes you tired and hungry again a few hours later, and the lack of fat that makes you less full and eat more to be satisfied.
I also worked with a company that made low fat (under 2% fat) desserts. The only way you can compensate for the lack of fat in terms of flavor is to add incredible amounts of sugar, as well as artificial flavorings. When we did desert tastings, I would get sugar lows a few hours later close to making me pass out. I had to learn to eat a high protein meal before tasting the new products.
Bottom line for me is to forget these high sugar deserts unless they also have a lot of protein. It is better to have an iced fruit protein drink in the summer than frozen yogurt, and for dessert a half cup of top quality ice cream is better than two cups of frozen yogurt or sorbet.

[rbtr8or]

Tasti D Lite is NOT yogurt. A tiny bit of research would have revealed this.

[67bug]

Ce Fiore is my favorite, way better than Pinkberry!