10/03/2013 12:04 pm ET Updated Dec 03, 2013

#Shutdown: Why Won't Democrats Say "Republicans Want Grandparents Dead?"

With the federal government now shut down, let's try a simple thought experiment. Here's a list of things that could be said by Democrats and liberal pundits in the media about the Republicans on Capitol Hill.

1. Republicans hate America's grandparents and want them dead.

As a result of the shutdown, the CDC is forced to stop its flu vaccine program. Since 1976, as many as 49,000 people in the US have died from the Flu... which can be nearly prevented by the vaccine. Many of those deaths are seniors.

2. Republicans are making America an easier target for terrorists and are putting American lives at risk.

As a result of the shutdown, Homeland Security must stop confirming the legal residence of immigrants who apply for jobs. What if the company that delivers the explosive C4 hires a driver who takes the shipment for an unscheduled stop?

3. The Republicans hate America and even worse, children.

Thanks to the shutdown, the National Park Service must close its 400 parks, including the Statue of Liberty, a popular location for New York and New Jersey school children.

4. Republicans are going to destroy the stability of America's fragile economy.

Regulators who oversee the trading of Commodities Futures will not be showing up to work -- which means that traders can run rampant. And who knows what they'll do if left unguarded. The last time a regulatory agency turned its back on a section of Wall Street, they decimated the housing market and very nearly collapsed the entire global economy.

5. Republicans hate America's bravest soldiers.

You see, as a result of the shut down, the Veteran's Administration will not be able to process new requests for education benefits or rehabilitation requests from soldiers injured overseas.

OK. So now here's our experiment. Why aren't the Democrats in Congress and the liberal pundits saying any of the above? Afterall, if the situation were reversed, you can be 100% certain these are the things Republicans on the Hill, FOX News and Rush would say about the Democrats. How do I know? Just last week, FOX News, et al said over and over that President Obama had weakened the US in the eyes of the world by not dropping bombs on Syria.

Here's my theory why most Liberal pundits and Democrats aren't saying what I've written above: we know it's NOT true. Well, that and most Democrats and Liberals suffer from a serious mental defect. You see, there's something wrong with our brains and conscience that doesn't permit us to invoke that kind of uber-hysterical hyperbole and rhetoric in the course of political discourse.

Also, most liberals and Democrats are missing the gene that would allow us to cut a bitch and bloviate the way the Right Wing Attack Machine does.

But, here's some good news. Some scientists in The Netherlands are working on a cure.

Jon Hotchkiss is the creator of the new science series, This vs That. Would you please follow him on TWITTER, so he can stay in touch? Thanks.

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