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Jon Soltz

Jon Soltz

Posted: November 21, 2007 11:24 PM

How to Make a Chickenhawk


Thanksgiving is a tough time of year for me, since I got back from Iraq. Actually, every holiday where we're supposed to give thanks and celebrate has been tough. My mind always goes back to those who didn't make it home, came come injured (physical or mental), and those still over there. For them, it's kind of tough to be thankful.

It's a feeling that so many in public service and the media will never understand. Hell, some of them did everything they could do NOT understand. And, yet, they have no problem going on TV and Radio and call veterans like me "defeatists" or "phony soldiers," and talk about how this is a necessary sacrifice we need to make.

So, when Arianna wrote to me and asked that I write something with a Thanksgiving theme, and that Nora Ephron posts some of her favorite recipes, I thought I'd post one of my own. Now, I'm no Emeril Lagasse, but when I thought of what bird I'd like to roast this Thanksgiving, I could think of none better than.... a chickenhawk.


Ingredients:

· 1 whole chicken

· Handful of juniper berries (to represent the berries on Rush Limbaugh's butt that 'kept him' from serving in Vietnam)

· A can of "au jus" (to represent France -- where Mitt Romney fled to avoid the draft)

· Mustard, Relish, Onions, Tomato (all the toppings of a Chicago hot-dog, which Richard Perle ate plenty of when he got out of Vietnam by attending the University of Chicago)

· Crisco (to represent the weight that Fred Kagan will drop when he heads to basic training once he decides it's actually worth personally fighting this war)

· Three Pinches of Rosehip (for Michelle Malkin, Ann Coulter, and Elizabeth Hasselbeck who all are apparently too delicate to sacrifice for America)

Rub all the ingredients on the chicken, and sprinkle with powdered sugar to represent George Bush's disappearance from the Texas Air National Guard, when he apparently had a problem with.... well, you know. Then, let it sit and find "other priorities," like Dick Cheney said he had when the nation needed him to fight in Vietnam.


The result is one of the most putrid birds you'll ever see in your life. The only way to combat the bad taste is by blasting heat at it with ads like this, this, and this.

In all seriousness, though, best wishes to you and your families for a healthy, happy Thanksgiving, on behalf of VoteVets.org.

Follow Jon Soltz on Twitter: www.twitter.com/jonsoltz

 
 
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09:38 PM on 11/25/2007
Nice recipe, but for a truely authentic chickenhawk...I'd add a hint of mint from Mark Foley.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
faith
06:03 PM on 11/25/2007
Well said Mr. Soltz ! I am truly heartbroken that our Congress refused to impeach the president and his cohort. I am sick that we have an additional 20,000 troops with brain injuries that the military "failed" to count in the wounded numbers. And, I am astonished that the military egregiously, unconscionably asked maimed and wounded Vets to give back bonuses because they were no longer able to fight. The nation has gone nuts. We have become such a selfish society that we do not comprehend the payment mr. bush's personal war has cost this nation in terms of human life and national treasure, and future economy (education, science, medicine, etc.). Woe is us. Woe, woe, is us.
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01:54 PM on 11/25/2007
Good piece of writing, Jon. Very apropos.

We, the people of .. our .. land, have no beef with you nor any of your comrades who are willing to fight and to suffer and to die for us. There is no way that we could give you all sufficient "thanks."

Except one.

We can "thank" you more properly if we hold the criminals in our political system fully and completely accountable for the crimes that they have willfully and maliciously perpetrated upon every single one of us. If we cast them from their offices in disgrace and bind them over for the just trial that they would never give to their enemies.
02:09 AM on 11/24/2007
Thank you for your service and your excellent post. I think Bush, Cheney & Co. relate to the troops rather like child molesters who tell their victims they love them as they rape them and ruin their lives. I simply don't understand why Congress has not found the will to impeach them. They have done so much harm to so many. It is a crime that they are not being held to account for it.

Keep on keeping and may angels watch over you.

Oh, and I am thankful for people like you and your fellows at VoteVets.org . You give me hope.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
countrycontemplative
Thoughtful reflections
01:09 AM on 11/24/2007
Thanks for a well written piece and the links to the videos. I'm a Vietnam era veteran and I too am sick of the chickenhawk cheerleaders for this recent tragedy. I pray everyday for those unfortunate enough to be left in the war zone and for an end to this madness. Peace.
07:52 PM on 11/23/2007
Excellent post and I enjoy your media appearances,but the Rush Asspimple Brigade will be in touch.WTF,did you think your service entitled you to free speech.
HUFFPOST PUNDIT
realpolitic
GOP is full of sound and fury, signifying nothing!
04:46 PM on 11/23/2007
Bill O'Reilly and Ann Coulter are profiles in courage. Well, not really!
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leftLibertarian
reefer+java=groovy
04:29 PM on 11/23/2007
Never Forget: Dick 'less' Cheney supported the Vietnam war yet when he was asked to serve in the military and fight in a war he supported, cried like a baby and was given Five Draft Deferments.

Never Forget: Rush LimpDick who also supported the war, cried like a baby because he had a tiny butt pimple and was given a draft deferment.

Many other Iraq War hawks never served> Glen Beck, Bill O'Reilly, William Kristol, Tom Friedman, Joe Lieberman and those Beltway Boys on Fox News.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
BillKen
11:59 AM on 11/23/2007
Thanks Jon. That was an absolutely great Post. I'm A Vietnam vet and my greatest regret is that you young guys are being betrayed like we were by all these worthless Shitbirds. It was really hard for me to realize that my government would stab me in the back but the message finally registered. My message to your generation is; don't take it. Semper Fi
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zendem1
Sometimes I like to touch other people's food
11:36 AM on 11/23/2007
A little pork for Ted Stevens

A fruit cup for Larry Vitter

A heaping pile of steaming bullshit for Wolfowitz and the PNAC

Some crazy bread for Rick Santorum

Rum balls for Scott McClellan(wink)

Southern fried chicken for Trent Lott

A nice Chinese dish for Hillary Clinton(it looks good on the outside, but you really don't want to know what's in it)
10:17 AM on 11/23/2007
Thanks, Jon. Please keep working to create awareness of this situation. As a mother of a soldier who has had two Iraq tours, I found it hard yesterday to feel peaceful when our soldiers are still in danger, put there by a machine so corrupt that our media cowers in fear. Funny how the same administration that holds itself above the law and constitution claims to have a mandate to export the same democracy it scorns to other countries. Smoke and mirrors, and the price of this magic show is beyond belief. But hey, most Americans don't know, don't want to know, and are content to be spoon fed drivel about celebrity antics and fall into the trap of character assisination and misinformation. I fear for this county.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
nutty4tahoe
Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them.
09:47 AM on 11/23/2007
Dear Jon Soltz: Please keep on keeping on. Only wish the MSM had to cojones to have you and Paul Reichoff on their shows so all the kool-aid drinking mom and pops out there (the ones who watch something other than Fox anyway) could clue up. Hopefully the TV ads to be run during the upcoming election campaigns can help get them straightened out. A hearty "thank you" from my family. It's people like you who help us feel we have something to be thankful for this Thanksgiving and something to look forward to being even more thankful about next Thanksgiving.
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VOTER
Freedom from fear - the philosophy of human rights
08:45 AM on 11/23/2007
Great Post!

VoteVets.Org is a remarkable and timely website. All voters and vets, especially members of the

VFW, should check it out.
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marko77
06:54 AM on 11/23/2007
Excellent post Jon Soltz. The best.
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texastrixie
I invented the internet.
02:04 AM on 11/23/2007
Dear Jon:
I hope you have a festive Thanksgiving, surrounded by people you love. It is very discouraging to hear from other vets that if you question why they were sent to Iraq, or why they are still there, that you don't support the troops. I have no problem with those that served - whatever their feelings - they served, not me, and with that service they have the right to say and think any dang thing they want about me. But it hurts my heart that wanting our soldiers not to die unless it is absolutely necessary is responded to with anger by many vets. I realize that if you didn't believe in this war it would be almost impossible for a soldier to get up each day and be prepared to die or have his buddy die.
But with the lack of proper equipment, the problems with inadequate medical treatment of vets when they come home, and the miserly education benefits awaiting those who come back healthy enough to want to go back to school, I am surprised that there isn't more anger at this administration by Iraq war vets and their families. Its not even to get President Bush, although I think he is the worst President we will ever have. I simply wish that everyone: the vets, their families, and the rest of us that owe them so much would demand better treatment of every vet that comes home, and greater regard to what these multiple deployments are doing to the soldiers' families. I just want all of us to thank, respect, and reward - in every way possible - each man and woman who has to breathe one breath of that hot, dusty, war.