Socialite Endorses McCain, Changes Everything

Merde! Lynn Forester de Rothschild, a top Hillary Clinton fundraiser, has endorsed John McCain for president of these United States. Apparently, the wife of Sir Evelyn de Rothschild feels Obama is "arrogant and has difficulty connecting with average Americans." And who better to tell us about connecting with Middle America than Lady de Rothschild herself?

Neil Cavuto proudly announced the endorsement today, asking, "Did this woman just help bring 18 million votes John McCain's way?"

Of course she did, Neil. Everyone knows that since Brooke Astor's death last August, many Midwest farmers and factory workers have been clueless as to which socialite's lead to follow. And whereas steelworkers traditionally take their cue from Liliane Bettencourt, the de Rothschild endorsement is certain to strike a populist chord and ensure an easy McCain victory.

Short of Sunny von Bulow coming out of her coma and endorsing Obama, this election is over.